SFist alerts you to the risk of “sport-caught shellfish” from Santa Cruz county carrying a neurotoxin called domoic acid, which causes amnesic shellfish poisoning (ASP). Of course, the key is that most shellfish people buy in stores or eat in restaurant is commercially caught, and thus “subject to frequent and mandatory testing.”
Domoic acid buildup in shellfish is caused by certain algal blooms. ASP can cause brain damage in humans, and seizures in marine mammals. Sounds awesome.
Fucking Obama and his compromise bipartisanship bullshit.
Remember when everybody made a big stink about Michelle Obama’s organic vegetable garden? Remember how tons of progressive yuppies thought it was, like, the coolest thing ever? Well, evidently, just because the Obamas don’t want their arugula drenched with hormone-altering chemicals and toxic sludge doesn’t mean that they give a shit about what farmers are allowed to spray on yours.
As Mother Jones (ugh, I know, they’re crazy) reports, Obama has nominated a former high-level lobbyist for the pesticide industry for a key agricultural post. In fact, the nominee hails from the very same organization that launched a series of ridiculous and kind of vicious attacks on Michelle’s little garden. (And the same organization that, under his watch, engaged in secret talks with the EPA to test pesticides on children. I will repeat that: test pesticides on children.
Not like Barack Obama has a stellar record on nominating progressives to key positions dealing with either the environment or food production, but this recent bit of news is especially WTF?!
The lobbyist (oh hey, remember Obama’s campaign promise not to fill key posts with lobbyists?) is expected to be confirmed without any problems. But with a name like “Islam ‘Isi’ Siddiqui,” there’s always a chance that the birthers and Lou Dobbs could unite to run this guy out of Washington. Fingers crossed.
From Ben, who stole it from this girl he has a crush on.
Win a copy of 500 Vegan Recipes! Hurry up and do it by Tuesday, Nov. 17!
The clever fuckers at the California Milk Advisory Board will be filming their latest “Happy Cows come from California” commercials in New Zealand. Torture the local cows, but don’t let the state benefit from production fees: such lovely people they are.
Local chefs discover that tofu is not an abomination against haute cuisine. Color us shocked. And hungry for samples!
Another poor review of Eating Animals, from another Gawker associate. Shut up, Joshua David Stein, you are much too pleased with yourself and your criticism.
For the strong-stomached, the birth of an elephant. Miracles: kinda gross! This goes for every human who records the births of their own young as well.
Remember Nicolette Hahn Niman’s ridiculous op-ed renouncing her ranch’s responsibility for carbon emissions? Peter Singer gives her brief, precise what-for.
King of Jerkoffs A. Bourdain says humans are allowed to eat animals because they are “smaller and stupider” than us. Ari Solomon says, intelligence is as intelligence does, bright boy. (Although we should note, Mr. Solomon, that “stupider” is an inflected comparative and most certainly a word.) (Grammarsaurus!)
Publisher’s Weekly selects this year’s best food books; titles include the bizarro Almost Meatless (“almost”? come the hell on), the revolting Lobel’s Meat Bible, and two books Vegansaurus wouldn’t mind unwrapping this holiday season: Ratio: The Simple Codes Behind the Craft of Everyday Cooking, and Salt to Taste: The Key to Confident, Delicious Cooking. Neither is vegan, but both seem extremely useful.
Revolting, slightly terrifying tale of a food writer’s giving in to a murderous impulse and shooting a baboon, and the global fallout.
Ours friends at Veg-Table are looking for writers for their city guides. GET ON IT, YOU WRITERLY PERSON.
A lot of you are probably planning on attending because you’re a bunch of g-d liberal hippies. All the info you need is here, but basically, it’s all day Friday (that’s TODAY!), Saturday, and Sunday. It’s at the San Francisco Concourse Exhibition Center and it’s $15 per day but there are various deals for bike riders and seniors (go on, people on wheels!).
There are definitely some great exhibitors like PCRM, VegNews (also a partner! go vegans!), Compassionate Cooks, International Fund for Animal Welfare, and more. There are also some lame exhibitors but I won’t go in to details because I’m not feeling particularly mean today but let’s just say the happy-meat-eating Prius crowd will be there IN FULL EFFECT. Guard your loins! I don’t know why I said that, just love the expression. Also, don’t procreate with those people. Also, I’ve noticed a bizarre amount of organic baby clothing for sale at these events. Probably has to do with the thing above.
Speakers include the usual hippies and visionaries and sometimes-crazy-people-with-a-point. Oh also, A QUEEN. Except not in the traditional sense but this is Green Fest, what’s traditional about it? Hey, guess what, I’m a Hobbit Wizard!
It’s pretty much a good time, LOTS of people giving stuff away, some good vegan food being sold, and good people watching. I’ll be there so if you see me, DO NOT MAKE EYE CONTACT. I’m hella crazy. Also, say hi! WHAT TO DO!?
Eat Pastry Cookie Dough is the S-H-I-Z (that is slang for something very delicious: e.g., “this shiz is delicious”). I’m not about to be coy or shy about the amount of this cookie dough that I ate. I ate a lot. I ate enough that if you were to lay these (beautifully designed) tubs filled with (g-d amazing) cookie dough side-by-side, that shit would wrap around the earth five times. I ate so much cookie dough that your mama is so fat and she could not eat as much cookie dough as I did. I ate so much cookie dough that you cannot recognize my scent as that of a human, only that of cookie dough. I ate so much cookie dough that YOU GET THE IDEA.
Eat Pastry is a small company that you might remember hearing about on Vegansaurus. They showed up on one of the design blogs Jonas reads because their design is super cute and fucking awesome. (It says adorable little things all over the package, like “made by two chefs who met in pastry school and have been in love ever since” and “let fully cool before you devour (we mean savor)”) So then we posted about them and dreamed of cookie dough but nothing happened. THEN, I was visiting the offices of the Republic of the Best Place on Earth, VegNews, and they freaking had Eat Pastry Cookie Dough!!! We sampled (read: gorged ourselves on it) one day after lunch and an incredible, insatiable crush was born. The kind of crush you can only stop by eating the person/cookie dough. Eat Pastry’s “website” is sadly missing really any content but with a little sleuthing, I was able to contact them and ask for some delicious dough. WELL BITCHES DELICIOUS DOUGH THEY SENT. Five different types, to be exact: Chocolate Chunk (my fave), Chocoholic Chunk (brownie in a tub, my fave), Cinnamon Ginger Spice (Christmas in a tub, my fave), Oatmeal Raisin Chocolate Chip (HOLY CRAP, my fave), and Peanut Butter Chocolate Chip (my other fave).
YOU GUYS. This is the kind of stuff that dreams are made. Literally, my dreams are made of little cookie dough-shaped people. You were there last night, Ginger Spice. You too, Chocolate Chunk. Eat it straight out of the tub and you know that your shit can’t get salmonella. OR WORSE. Bake it up and know that you have Perfect Cookies. Like Stepford Wives perfect. I wish I were like them, their lives are so great! (By the way, I’ve only seen the first 30 minutes of that movie.) This is the kind of product that you want to throw a parade for. It’s like Daiya, but for cookie dough. I know that the phrase, “it’s so good you can’t tell it’s vegan!” gets waaaaaay overused but seriously, it is painfully, deliciously true when it comes to Eat Pastry Cookie Dough. YOU CANNOT TELL IT IS ISN’T VEGAN. OR I MEAN IS VEGAN SEE HOW IT IS FUCKING WITH ME.
Anyway, it’s currently available in some Whole Foods in San Diego (for the first time in my life, I am jealous of San Diego OH SNAP) and Mother’s Markets. I am assured that they are expanding their reach to Northern California very soon and so we can all get it on it. SO PLEASE, whenever you’re in Whole Foods here, fill out one of those customer comment cards and ask for Eat Pastry Vegan Cookie Dough! And Basu’s Homestyle! And Daiya! And also, ask at Rainbow too. Let’s do this, vegans. Activism has never been so delicious. Except for that one kind of activism that involves sex workers.
So what this shiz is, you join and they send out a daily group coupon (GROUPON, GET IT?). If enough people buy in, you get an awesome deal. For example, today in SF, they have one for a place that has VEGAN PIZZA. You buy a $20 gift certificate for $10! SCORE. Never ate there so can’t confirm on the deliciousness of the pizza, but that’s rad.
No, seriously. Vegansaurus is looking to expand and take over the world and dominate in every way possible. We’re looking for writers.
Specifically, we’re looking for people who are way into vegan food. We are especially interested in people who are really into cooking, baking, and creating amazing recipes. Also, someone with a good eye for current events, especially (obviously) vegan news. Certainly being a witty genius is a plus because we need more of that. this could be one person. or it could be two. You don’t have to be in San Francisco as we’re looking to expand our reach. But we need people who can contribute two to three times per week.
If you’re interested, send a couple samples of your writing to laura @ vegansaurus dot com, even if it’s just your blog or some scanned-in poetry. Actually not that second thing. Please god.
Vegans, vegetarians, and yes, even omnivores are invited to apply. And maybe your dog too if he can use a computer.
First, let’s appease the FTC by noting that we received a copy of this book for free, for reviewing purposes. Second, let’s appease the critics by noting that as Lisa Jervis is a founder of Bitch magazine, we are predisposed to love her. Third, I don’t have any photos of the food I made because I don’t have a functioning camera, so you’re just going to have to imagine how wonderful everything looked, OK? Fourthly, let’s write this.
Cook Food is a little, no-frills book that is crammed full of useful information. It’s written by a (seemingly) very practical person for the very pragmatic cooks among us, by which I mean she takes a very “do the best you can with what you have” approach, with her recipes functioning more as inspiration than rules to strictly follow. This, I dig; often I want to make dish but cannot find one of the ingredients, and do not have the opportunity and/or inclination to go get it. It’s rare to find a cookbook author who encourages you to wing it. This is all right.
I tried out three recipes from Cook Food, all of which I tried to follow to the letter but none of which I did, exactly. The first was Rosemary Mustard Tofu; lazily, I didn’t press the tofu at all, but I did let it sit in the marinade for a good long time. Per the author’s notes, the leftovers did make a good sandwich the next day. I accidentally put too much dijon mustard in the sauce, because I have trouble with tasks like measuring, but it wasn’t a big deal, really.
Next I made Lentils with Wine, which I loved and will definitely make again. For a dish with so few ingredients, it has a lot of flavor, full-bodied and rich and just really delicious. Red wine, red onion and green lentils are apparently the perfect combination.
Lastly, I tried out her version of peanut sauce, which, as she warned, was not at all like the Thai-style peanut sauce I had sort of wanted (despite having read the recipe before deciding to prepare it). This one I fiddled with, a little; I found it quite salty and, I don’t know, off somehow, so I added a lot of white balsamic vinegar and a couple splashes of plain soy milk, and that seemed to mend it for me. Then I ate it on everything; on Trader Joe’s vegetable gyoza; over cold mixed lettuces and hot rice (DELICIOUS, my goodness); as a dip for baby carrots and steamed broccoli. It turned out to be a very versatile sauce.
Cook Food wasn’t written by a vegan; it’s a vegan cookbook because Lisa Jervis believes that eating mostly organically and locally grown produce is healthiest for us and our environment (and she’s right, duh). It’s plainspoken without being obvious, and pragmatic without condescending. It’d make a wonderful first cookbook for new vegans—much better than those “Vegan Recipes for College Students” that teach you how to boil pasta or whatever—but once your skills have improved beyond “beginner” you’ll still find it useful.
Plus, like I said, it’s Lisa Jervis, and everything she creates is of very high quality.
If you’ve got the money, I’ve got the time KNOW WHAT I’M SAYIN GREAT NEITHER DO I.
If you are so inclined/filthy rich, you could spend Thanksgiving doing it up at Millennium. Oh go for it, you have no family who loves you anyway. I mean in the Bay Area! I’m not that mean! OR AM I, PERSON WITH NO FAMILY WHO LOVES YOU?? IN THE BAY AREA. Dang, paranoid!
OH ALSO SPEAKING OF THAT…if there are any stragglers around for the holidays who can’t afford Millennium, you’re welcome to come with me to my parents’ house. It’s seriously a blast. First, we will eat hella mashed potatoes, then we’ll hear my dad lecture about raquetball and/or aliens, then my four-year-old niece will feel you up, and THEN we’ll watch a movie! Probably something with an end-of-the-world or Strawberry Shortcake theme. It’s actually tons of fun, email me!
If you can’t/refuse to make it to either event, you can always recreate the Eric Tucker Experience with his pumpkin pie recipe (Thanks, VegNews!). I’d share mine but basically it’s exactly his only I came up with it first um yes that’s the ticket.
ManzanitaShangri-La Vegan is the place to go when you’re sick of feeling like a big fat greasy intoxicated pig and need to feel cleansed, which is obviously not good for all occasions but certainly has its place. It’s organic, vegan, macrobiotic food FOR CHRIST’S SAKE. I know that just made half of you go, “oooh…tell me more” and it made the other half (the smarter half, some might say) go, “DISGUSTING I HATE YOU LAURA I HOPE THIS BLOG BURNS TO THE GROUND.” However, I would ask you to reserve judgment as I am so often unwilling to do. Manzanita Shangri-La Vegan is actually quite fantastic. Be prepared to be surrounded by white people with dreads who might step outside for a delightful mid-meal game of hacky sack (but you’re used to that by now, aren’t you). Just go with it. If you can’t handle a woman coming up for some fresh air after an invigorating partner yoga session to openly breastfeed her seven-year-old, what can you handle!? JESUS, GROW A PAIR.
Things that are especially delicious: the salad dressings, the kale (I don’t know what they do but MAGIC!), and actually pretty much everything is really good. Except the vegan baked goods. As you might have guessed, I’m a junk food vegan so I know how hard it is to get the baked goods right, but come on. You’ve got time and a kitchen, let’s get to practicing! Less time making daisy chains and sexing in communal hot tubs (SHUDDER) and more time in the kitchen! ALL SAID, this place sounds way more hippy-dippy than it actually is (lie) and the food is way worth a visit (truth).
Sorry for the late notice. But if you’re looking for something more hip to do than whatever you usually do on Tuesday nights, check it out. Get into some poetry-slam post-punk hip-hop David Bowie revival action. Apparently he’s vegan too.
More specifically, the second or third week of November, in Jack London Square in Oakland. It will offer wines and vegetarian small plates. You’re invited to contact Eric directly and ask him to please at least make most of the dishes vegan or easily veganizable. Because that’s dope that he’s keeping it all vegetarian but really, you are ERIC TUCKER from MILLENNIUM. We have expectations, Tucker. Your empire is built on the backs of vegans so do not forsake us or we’ll go totally non-violent and pacifist on your ass!
If you actually read Eating Animals, which you clearly didn’t, or you just hate him SO MUCH that it clouds everything, you would know it’s not preachy. It’s extremely well researched, smart, and thoughtful. I mean, we just want you to THINK about this stuff, AT THE VERY LEAST. Your knee-jerk snarky omnivore response is hardly conducive.
Also, this comment from “carbonadam”:
Any vegetarian who thinks animal life is more sacred than plant life is sorely mistaken. All life is sacred and none from the lowly ameba, to humans, to trees, vegetables, nuts, goats, dogs, cows, whales, roaches and rats is any more important than the other. This “animals are more sacred” than plants argument is nonsense and is rooted in human hubris that is about as arrogant and single minded as it can get. vegetarians can be annoying and self righteous and at the end of the day they still have to place organic matter into their maws that was once alive, as do we all, in order to say alive. I say let the annoying ones who think they have it all figured out grind up rocks into dust and eat that instead of organic plant and animal life.
Is this the aptitude level of the average Gawker commenter ? I mean, COME ON.
Let’s be real: the only thing that matters about Thanksgiving is the pie. When everyone else has forsaken you, you can always turn to pie. Unfortunately, we’re short on pumpkin, sweet potato, and pecan pies here in the Bay Area, but maybe next year!? All I know is, we gots to ask for what we want so if you want these types of pies, email your favorite pie place and ASK FOR THEM! Come on vegans! This is three-minute activism, you can do it!! Okay, enough of the patronizing, let’s pie this!
Alameda Pie has got you covered with vegan apple pie. They’ll be delivering all over the Bay Area but get your orders in, stat!
Mission Pie has an Apple Brandy Raisin pie for the vegans. Get your orders in on the double. Pick up at their store.
Bike Basket Pies is gonna hook you up with several variations on apple and pear pies, including apple-cranberry and pear-ginger. THEY MIGHT ALSO HAVE A PUMPKIN PIE. No word yet but perhaps if enough vegans requested it, WHO KNOWS!? Pick up in the mission.
In The Mood For Food Vegan Catering has a vegan pumpkin pie! Woohoo! They also have apple-walnut tarts, pear-pecan tarts, apple pies, pear pies, PECAN PIES, brownies & carrot-oat cookies! In fact, they have a full on vegan Thanksgiving catering menu so check it out & get your orders in ASAPly! Oh, and they DELIVER.
Rainbow is selling several vegan pies, including some new stuff from Sugar Plum Vegan, including a gluten-free chai spice sweet potato pie and a pumpkin cheezecake. You gotta head to the store to see what their selection is.
Whole Foods will definitely have vegan pies. Sure, they’ll be boring but you know, you gots to takes what you can gets NOW GO EMAIL SOME PLACES.
Oh and yeah, I’m sure any of our local vegan bakeries (sugar beat sweets, violet sweet shoppe, fat bottom bakery, cinnaholic, sugar plum vegan, idle hands baking company, ETC ETC - google them for more info because girrrrl, I gots a job I gotta get back to!) would be stoked to help cater all your holiday pie needs, so don’t forget about them!!
ONE LAST THING: You can always get a vegan ice cream cake (pumpkin ice cream YES PLEASE) from Maggie Mudd! Bonus point: all ice cream cakes are 20 percent off in November!!!
ONE MORE LAST THING: Perhaps you choose to keep it super-fancy and want to bake one yourself. OH YOU ARE SO FANCY AND BETTER THAN THE REST OF US.
We decide to deep fry everything in the house. Including maybe the house.
Honestly, both Hazel and Jonas are lucky they’re still alive. DEEP FRYING IS HELLA FUN.
I’m not gonna tell you exactly how to be you but I will say a couple things. There are tons of amazing recipes for vegan batters and deep-fry dishes on VegWeb.
You have a fridge with stuff in it, right? WELL THEN DEEP-FRY THAT SHIZ.
I also will provide two quick recipes:
Get some stone-ground cornmeal (or just a rough ground, you ain’t got to be fancy with a stone and shit), some flour, some nutritional yeast, some salt & pepper, and mix all that together; now you have a great crunchy fry coating. You can either get some silken tofu and then whip the shit out of it with a little water and make a base for dipping before you coat it in the fry mix, or you can just coat with some olive oil and dip. Easy-peasy, ocean-breezy. It makes a delicious coating on your food and is super-fast and delicious. Trust.
PIZZA ROLLS. Okay, this is Jonas’ specialty and WHAT A SPECIALTY IT IS. All you need is some pizza dough (we used the pre-made stuff in the fridge section of Trader Joe’s! We lazy!), some pizza or pasta sauce, some vegan sausage, and some vegan cheese. Just roll out the pizza dough thin; cut it into triangles; put some sauce, sausage, and cheese in the center; roll it up so it looks like a crescent roll; DEEP FRY IT. Giiiirrrrlllll…it is SO TASTY. You know you want to, fatty. Just do it.
And remember, you can do this and feel not truly awful about it because A) FAT PEOPLE RULE and B) Since all your deep-frying is animal-free, it means its cholesterol-free! THAT’S RIGHT. I believe that means you can deep-fry with impunity. So do it up, you’re hella skin-and-bones, anyway. The only person that’s attractive on is LFB and you know it.
AND YES, that is a Wii Fit in the background of that picture. We use it when we run out of table room for fry.
Our next sale will raise money for Food Empowerment Project, who work with youth and low-income populations to make healthier, more informed food choices AND SaveABunny, who saves the shit out of the CUTEST BUNNIES EVER. Added bonus, we’ll have adoptable bunnies on the scene (!!!) and ready to go home with loving, awesome homes.
Check it out Saturday, December 5th, in front of Ike’s Place (3506 16th St. at oh come on you know where Ike’s is fine it’s Sanchez can’t you go anywhere without Google Maps?), 11 a.m. to 4 p.m.
We badly need volunteers, eaters, bakers, paper plates, compostable to-go containers & flatware, and hella publicity to make this awesome so mobilize, vegan (pacifist) army and email firstname.lastname@example.org if you can/want to/feel obligated to pitch in! Let’s make this happen!!!
This past Friday, the SFPD raided the beloved, the delicious, THE BENIGN Brassica Supperclub and forced them to shut down. OH HELL NO. Aren’t there real crimes going on in this city to focus on? Like rapings and beatings and shiz? A VEGAN SUPPERCLUB. Ain’t nobody getting sick from some cabbage, fools.
The weirdest part, some guests overheard one of the police say that they were vegetarian and that they wanted to stay and eat but couldn’t! I mean, how is that for bizarre? Oh and the cops MADE A RESERVATION. Way to infiltrate, po-po! This is more sophisticated shit than The Wire!
Anyway, not to get all Free Murat on your asses but, is there anything we can do??
The American is a new grilled cheese restaurant opening in South Park (January-ish, we gather?), and we have heard through the grapevine that some vegan options may be included in the final menu. Currently, vegan grilled cheese is only available in SF at Ike’s Place.
JSF mania, regal vegan dining, tons of recipes, horrible tragedy and more in this week's (bipolar) link-o-rama!
TODAY! That’s Friday, Nov. 6: Jonathan Safran Foer is having a book signing at UC Berkeley at 7 p.m. in the Multicultural Center! Woo!!
On Sunday, Nov. 8 at noon King of Ughs David Chang and Ubuntu’s vegetarian betrayer Jeremy Fox will appear in conversation with each other at Omnivore Books (3885 Cesar Chavez St. at Church Street). New York Times columnist (and co-author of His Majesty of Shut Up, David Chang’s new book) Peter Meehan will moderate.
JSF makes a modern Modest Proposal to omnivores: how about some delicious dog? One of your Vegansaurs’ first solid foods was dog soup. This was not a major factor in his/her decision to go vegan (GUESS WHOSE), as it only happened once, during toddlerhood; the point is, duh, all meat is equally reprehensible.
Miss Vegan Drinks? Of course you do! Thank goodness for the East Bay, who’ve been doing their thing on non-holiday Tuesdays and want to see you at their next meeting! Mix and mingle on Tuesday, Nov. 10 at 6:30 p.m. at the Kona Club, at 4401 Piedmont Ave. at Pleasant Valley Avenue in Oakland! Details here.
Hey, Science: “Because such monkey torture will not lead to improved human health, you don’t need to be an animal rights advocate to wonder if an ethical cost-benefit analysis might conclude that the ends don’t justify the means.”
Nicolette Hahn Niman doesn’t want you to blame her ranch for the environmental problems caused by raising animals for food; after all, she says, “Singling out meat is misleading and unhelpful, especially since few people are likely to entirely abandon animal-based foods.” And anyway, ”avoiding soy from deforested croplands may be more difficult…. Brazilian soy is common (and unlabeled) in tofu and soymilk sold in American supermarkets,” so shut up and eat your Bill-Niman-de-and-renounced “happy” beef, already. JESUS LADY.
Adult Dungeness crabs are few and far between for the second consecutive year, but that won’t stop most fishermen from going out to catch as many as they (legally) can. Fishing in a “down” season makes perfect sense, hooray people.
CHOW honors local hero Bryant Terry and Queen of Vegetables Deborah Madison in its first annual awards, the CHOW 13. Too bad they have to tell us how much they looooove Ryan “literally all of the pig” Farr as well, boo.
For reasons as yet unknown, all the female spectacled bears in the Leipzig (Germany) Zoo have lost nearly all of their hair. They look incredibly pathetic without their usual “fluffy dark brown” fur coats.
Oh delicious, sumptuous, vegan cuisine literally good enough for the Queen: a luncheon at Windsor Castle, part of a “Celebration of Faiths and the Environment,” satisfied all the participants’ dietary requirements by eliminating all animal products from the menu! An “autumnal roasted pear salad” with “deeply savory…toasted [Kentish] cobnuts”? Yes, please!
Yobie Benjamin analyzes the most recent reviews of and data on San Francisco’s public school lunches, and determines that, duh, it can be done better, for cheaper. The notable part here is that he includes veg options in his price breakdowns. It’s not more expensive to eat vegan! OK?!!
How revolting: a guy in Cleveland had very poorly hidden the bodies of six women—who had been raped and murdered—“in and around” his house, which is next door to a sausage factory, which some people blamed for the stench. Rotting carcasses stink, be they human or other animal.
The SF Bay Guardian makes a giant effort and reviews Greens. Revelation: it still makes good food. Your omnivorous friends will not complain (too much) about being denied their meat for one meal. Like we were saying, a new restaurant critic with some imagination re: veg food, please.
On Saturday, Nov. 21, friends-of-Vegansaurus Farm Sanctuary are hosting a Celebration for the Turkeys dinner, “designed” by Colleen Patrick-Goudreau! Tickets cost $75 for adults and $35 for children, and are on sale now. Unless you are also a famous vegan cookbook author, this is guaranteed to be a lot tastier than your Thanksgiving dinner, so you might as well go. Plus it supports farm animals, instead of crazy relatives who drink too much/not enough; a pig will never ask you when you’re going to give it grandchildren or if you’ve put on weight.
A what? An Animal Protection Liaison, as proposed by the Humane Society of the United States, would “work with the executive agencies and Congress to advance animal protection policies.” Simple, right? Yes!
guidelines for improving the lives of our nation’s animals, both domesticated and wild; the APL would help ensure those guidelines are followed.
Look, this puppy gets the best care ever, I mean, he has damn hell ass Secret Service agents to protect him. And he is ONE SMALLISH DOG. What about dogs born in puppy mills? What about cows on feedlots? What about endangered animals? They need someone to protect them. All you have to do is sign this itsy bitsy little petition—it is one brief form—and HSUS will forward it to the president or whomever in his administration is in charge of receiving such things. Easy-peasy.
Jonathan Safran Foer on The Ellen Show. VEGGIE CELEBRITY POWER IGNITE! Too bad he’s straight and she’s gay and they’re both married and there is a significant and probably insurmountable age gap and they live on different coasts because IF THEY WERE A COUPLE. Watch out, world! I’m so sorry I just wrote all that.
This is for you (semi) old-school vegans who remember this delicious turkey-shaped fake bird. It was the bomb, tastier than a tofurky, and adorably/creepily shaped like a turkey. Unfortunately it’s still off the market but fortunately some vegan sleuths dug up its recipe and shared it with us. AND A MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL!
Just because Halloween is past us, doesn’t mean it’s time to put the pumpkin away just yet. After all, it’s still decorative gourd season! Here are just a few of the seasonally available pumpkin-flavored goods you can be sure of enjoying until January at least.
For me, the season was inaugurated not with changing leaves, but when I first noticed the return of Starbucks' beloved Pumpkin Spice Latte. Get that shit with soy milk, no whip—with or without a shot of espresso as your mood dictates—and you’re golden. I ask you, is there a better way to enjoy these coming cold(ish) months than with a steaming hot cup of corporate good cheer?
UPDATE: Scrooge came early this year! Against our better judgment, we believed the word of a Starbucks employee and didn’t examine the ingredients label for ourselves. The PSL is not vegan, even with soy milk—we are very bummed! Mea maxima culpa. SOLUTION: Make your own with this easily veganizable recipe.
Peet’s Coffee also has a pumpkin-flavored latte available, but it’s not as good as Starbucks’ version. Consider it the lesser of the two. Unlike Starbucks, however, these are definitely vegan.
Clif Bar features a “Spiced Pumpkin Pie” flavor as one of three seasonally available flavors. The others, just so you know, are “Spiced Gingerbread” and “Cranberry Orange Nut Bread.” I can’t vouch for cranberry yet (it’s new), but the others are delicious (for Clif bars). AND they will give you vitamins and energy to keep you going on the…trail…or whatever.
For those marginally more inclined towards making something themselves, Trader Joe’s brings us their Pumpkin Bread and Muffin Mix. This stuff is the shit. We’ve already shown you how to hack their bread mixes. The important takeaway is: substitute 1/2 cup of canned pumpkin for the eggs! After all, why would you want to dilute your bread with anything that’s not MORE pumpkin?
Now available at Whole Foods and Trader Joe’s is Buffalo Bill’s pumpkin ale. This is a relatively decent beer which earns unaccountably low marks from sites such as Beer Advocate. They must know something I don’t! Side note: Buffalo Bill’s brewery is located just over in Hayward, and their menu actually has a vegan pizza listed. Granted, it’s just veggies and no cheese, and it’s the only vegan item they have, but still! They might be getting a visit from me soon!
Superior to Buffalo Bill’s by all accounts (including mine) is Dogfish Head’s Punkin Ale. This is for “real” beer drinkers only, and comes with a price tag to match. Available at Whole Foods and City Beer Store, this is what I’ll be pouring over my head in between Pumpkin Spice Silk rinses, all holiday season.
What’s your favorite vegan pumpkin food product? Seriously, I would love to know: I won’t be happy until I’m eating nothing but pumpkin in its various forms.
The SF Weeklyrecently laid off its restaurant critic, and is searching for a new one. Want the job? We want you to have it! Obviously, we can’t; that’s why we have Vegansaurus, right? Right. But you, careful, considerate omnivores who for whatever reasons haven’t given up your animal-unfriendly diets yet, certainly could!
I know, it sounds insane, vegans encouraging you to eat meat. Well, we’re not, exactly; what we’re thinking is, we need more mainstream restaurant critics who enjoy vegan food, and understand that you can eat very well without animal products. If you’re going to have to review new dead-cow and dead-fish restaurants, you could try the veg options at those places, or at least note if there are any. I tend to skip the reviews in publications of all sizes, not just because they almost never review vegetarian or vegan restaurants, but because they usually don’t even address the concept of not eating animal products. People like us are left to figure everything out for ourselves, which is ridiculous; if you want to increase your audience (I’d say “sell more papers” but the Weekly is free), broaden your range. Include us. Our demographic spends a lot of money on food; we’re interested in what’s new and delicious, and we love to read good food writing. How about throwing us something other than a bone?
So omnivorous readers, and readers with omnivorous friends, what do you say? An actual writing job has opened up at an actual publication; all you eligible people should apply, already.
Hear that, you guys? “Real” Americans don’t want universal healthcare, live in major cities, or have domestic arrangements other than marrying someone of the opposite sex and making babies, and they especially aren’t fucking vegetarians.
This is rich coming from the New York goddamn Times, you know?
You might be thinking, “What a boring product to review. I am so tired of looking at Amy’s frozen foods in my local boutique grocery freezer case. I don’t even eat frozen foods; I only eat meals prepared from farmer’s market ingredients and Veganomicon recipes.” Nice life, snob. Also, marry me.
What I’m saying is that for regular people with busy lives, desk jobs and no money, frozen food happens and Amy’s is generally one of your better options. Specifically, the Black Bean Vegetable Burrito is where it’s at. I ate these twice a day in college, and have recently rediscovered them as the perfect food, after a long (sad) accidental hiatus.
This delicious creation is made with a whole wheat tortilla, a bunch of organic vegetables like tomatoes and peppers, it’s totally vegan, and it tastes like one of those junk food refried bean Taco Bell burritos from the ’80s that tasted SO GOOD when you were a kid and never allowed to eat them. Actually, I wasn’t allowed to eat them so I could be remembering that incorrectly, but you know what I mean? The delicious taste of junk food chemically engineered to addict your brain?
(OOH speaking of that, Eric Schlosser was at Herbst Theater last night and I would totally have gone if I could! He’s not talking about fast food though, he’s talking about our fucked prison system. Still very interesting.)
Anyway, to recap, Amy’s black bean burrito is full of good stuff but it tastes conventionally delicious. Also it’s about $3 and rocking 9 grams of protein and no cholesterol, so I recommend you keep several in your office freezer. Find it in the freezer case at your local spot (if you live in San Francisco or a comparable city where your vernacular grocery markets are full of things like organic produce and the Hain-Celestial family of products.)
Berkeley, get going: tomorrow, Wednesday, Nov. 4, the Boalt Hall Animal Law Society will show Food, Inc. Be in room 100 in Boalt Hall on the UC Berkeley campus by 5:30 p.m. for the screening, which is free for everyone! Awesome! The film runs about 90 minutes, and is supposed to be very good. Or at least worth no money!
An Omnivore's take/rant on the cult of David Chang.
OK, so when I first heard about Ubuntu starting to serve meat on special Tuesdays or whatever I was all, WTF UBUNTU?!?! Then I realized, hey the economy and all that BS, and I am totally supportive of any and everything Ubuntu tries to do (and if you haven’t tried their Marcona almonds with lavender sea salt then you are missing out on ECSTACY, YES THE DRUG I LOVE TRIPPING ON E I MEAN ALMONDS TOUCH ME PLEASE) so if Ubuntu needs to make a quick buck by serving meat like every other Napa restaurant then so be it, ‘cause I will WIN THIS by GOING ON WEDNESDAY, HUZZAH!
But THEN I heard that it’s gonna involve lame-ass “guest chefs” or something else equally as ‘tarded, and that it’s gonna involve David Chang, and I’m like WTF all over again.
David Chang owns 97 Momofuku-branded craptacular restaurants in Manhattan and let me tell you something: he’s totally mean; and also, homie, your food ain’t all that, y’hear? And notwithstanding the stupid “figs on a plate I hate you San Francisco and vegetarians BLAH BLAH BLAH” comments he said, we already have a David Chang here and his name is Charles Phan and in SF HE AIN’T ALL THAT. Slanted Door is one of the hardest restaurants to get a reservation to but I think if you ask any foodie what they think about Slanted Door, they’d be all, Yeah it’s all right, but it’s way too expensive and I’d only go there on an expense account. Because in reality what we have here is a Chinese dude smiling at you letting you know that you shouldn’t be scared to eat Chinese food because THIS Chinese food is different because it’s Niman Ranch, but then you look all around you and IT’S ALL WHITE PEOPLE IN COLLARED SHIRTS, because Chinese people know what the real shit is all about and don’t need to be comforted knowing their own cuisine and don’t get me started on stupid yuppies co-opting street food because at the end of the day it’s just yuppie white folks not wanting to feel guilty about their discomfort with other cultures. And yes this was the longest sentence in the history of sentences but I think we all know what I’m getting at here, right?!?
I rant, yes, but at the end of the day, Momofuku and all its 1,598 incarnations just aren’t good. And to Ubuntu I say, Go on with your bad self, and make hella money, but dude, why you gotta throw David Chang a bone? Stop trying to make me love you less!
This rant is brought to you by Omnivore Ed. Let it be known that Vegansaurus also thinks David Chang is a shithead and his cult-like following is definitely goofy. I mean, what? Does his food give you a bigger penis or cause you to sprout wings? NO? SHUT. UP.Also, we ask you this: IS IT COINCIDENCE THAT “CHANG” RHYMES WITH “DUMBASS OVERRATED CHEFLEBRITY”??? RIDDLE ME THAT!