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October 2010

Buy a Sparrow Project shirt for Farm Sanctuary!

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It’s called style and substance, you should cultivate both. The Sparrow Project can help, by kitting you out in one of their adorable shirts! They’ve got something like seven different designs, and the proceeds benefit organizations like Clean Ocean Action and Farm Sanctuary. Specifically, sales of the “Vegan” design go to Farm Sanctuary. Cute, right? It’s printed on American Apparel cotton, and costs $25.

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They’re selling a vegan-themed tote bag to benefit Farm Sanctuary as well. It costs $18, is made of cotton canvas, and encourages people to ask you why you’re vegan. Perhaps a better approach than a Sharpied t-shirt and a massive fanny pack, but who are we to judge? No one, is the answer, especially when your Vegansaurus’ favorite tote is black canvas with this design on white.

Sparrow Media keep a lively blog focused on social justice issues, if you’re interested in that sort of thing—which, really, freedom is freedom whether it’s for humans or animals. One of their members will be in the Bay Area later in October, should anyone with retail connections like their merchandise. We are certainly looking forward to hearing more from them!

Sep 30, 201013 notes
#brooklyn #meave gallagher #shirts #sparrow media #the sparrow project #tote bags #vegan fashion #social justice #activism
Canadian rabbit insanity part II: EXODUS OF THE BUNS

Remember four months ago, when the internet went a little nuts for the story of the “feral” rabbits living on basically every grassy space on the University of Victoria campus in British Columbia, Canada? Your Vegansaurus was skeptical about applying that “feral” adjective because of the the rabbits’ behavior in the videos—they were so calm around people! Which is shockingly atypical wild rabbit behavior! Frankly it is sometimes shockingly atypical companion rabbit behavior, for the more nervous of our bunny pals. It made us curious about the origins of these INVASIVE RABBIT HORDES, and how they had come to be, within a few generations, so remarkably nonchalant surrounded by loud, stompy human beings all the time.

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Thanks to Rebecca Dube from the Globe and Mail, we finally have an answer: people have been dumping their rabbits on the campus. About 1,600 bunnies live at UVC right now, and while the authorities have considered the “feral” rabbit population a Big Problem for about 20 years, apparently it’s finally big enough for them to consider it a Big Actionable Problem.

What gave us serious pause (zing) was what action the authorities would take. This story only garnered international media attention when the University made its problems with the bunnies public; and once the internet got to giggle at the idea of rabbits “taking over” humans’ space, the internet—i.e., the rest of the world—stopped paying attention. The Rabbit Hordes were still Wreaking Havoc, though, and British Columbia still intended to Do Something about them.

The initial plan was to kill them. Surprise! People love to kill Problem Animals. Thank goodness there are other, good people who don’t! Rabbit activists and Canada Green Party members helped arrange transfer of 1,000 members of the Rabbit Hordes to the Wild Rose Rescue Ranch in Whitehouse, Tex. Can you believe it? The U.S. did Canada a solid! It’s a beautiful thing. They’re able to move this many bunnies—up to 96 at a time—internationally with a permit from The Responsible Animal Care Society, a Canadian nonprofit group that is currently trying to raise money for the transport of all 1,000 rabbits.

If you have any spare change, please please please donate to the bunny transport fund! Wild Rose Rescue has so much space for them to run and play, and of course they’re all being fixed first, so there won’t be another Rabbit Horde explosion. They take donations through Paypal, so all us non-Canadians can give our foreign money worry-free.

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[photograph of veterinarian Joseph Martinez by Steve Bosch, Vancouver Sun]

Now, what about the remaining 600 rabbits? That’s also in progress. It appears the plan is to spay or neuter all of those rabbits as well (of course!), and move about 400 of them to “safe havens” elsewhere in British Columbia. According to the university’s “long-term rabbit management plan,” after all the bunnies have been trapped and sterilized, 200 may continue to live on campus.

We really admire the work all the rabbit activists did on behalf of the Rabbit Hordes. Making such complicated arrangements clearly wasn’t easy, and they still have lots to do. The bunnies never meant to cause trouble; they never should have been living on the University of Victoria campus, and these are good people saving the victims of other people’s selfish mistakes. Again, if you can, give a little to help get the bunnies down to Texas. Do your bit to save the Rabbit Hordes.

Sep 30, 20106 notes
#Invasive Rabbit Hordes #british columbia #bunnies #canada #exodus of the buns #invasive species #news update #rabbits #university of victoria #tracs #meave gallagher

September 2010

Drown your end-of-coupon-days sorrows TONIGHT at SF Vegan Drinks!

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Yes, it’s the last coupon day at Rainbow, ever. You were already planning to camp out in line from dawn till dusk to save 20 percent off a barrel of flax seed oil, so why not follow it up by drinking the pain away at SF Vegan Drinks? Or show up early, and drunk-shop for the final two hours of crazy. And speaking of drink specials, I hear we have those? Here are the details, from Lyndsay (who said “hi” as I walked by on Valencia Street yesterday and didn’t realize until it was too late who it was SORRY LYNDSAY I THINK YOU’RE GREAT I AM JUST BLIND):

Just a heads up that the September installment of Vegan Drinks is Thursday, Sept. 30 at Martuni’s (Valencia @ Market). This a fantastic chance to mingle with other interesting vegans while enjoying drink specials—this month: $5 Rock Sake Pomegranate Lemonade Martinis—a host of non-alcoholic beverage options, and all-you-can-eat vegan hot dogs and popcorn!

A representative of Rock Sake will be joining us and will provide a variety of free samples. Looking forward to seeing you! 

Here’s the thing. Coupon day is hell, but 20 percent off everything you could ever want has been hard to pass up. I hate waiting in lines, and I complain bitterly about it, but I’ll also miss getting all that free stuff without having to shoplift. Not that I would ever shoplift from Rainbow in a million years. There’s a lot of love in the people who make that grocery store happen, and they’re still worker-owned; how great is that? While other people are busy with wage theft and exploiting immigrant labor, places like Rainbow give me hope for humanity. 

Also giving me hope/dulling my hopelessness for humanity: drinking. SF Vegan Drinks is sponsored by Vegansaurus and VegNews, and we’ll be there tonight! So show up! At Martuni’s! From 6 to 8 p.m.! Sí se puede!

Sep 30, 20101 note
#events #martuni's #sf vegan drinks #vegnews #steve simitzis #rainbow grocery
Gimme gimme gimme Onigilly's onigiri!

Oh my goodness gracious you guys, am I dreaming? Possibly, possibly I am dreaming. Just look at this photo from SFoodie and tell me it doesn’t look like a meal heaven would serve (if there were a heaven, etc. etc.)

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[photo by John Birdsall for SFoodie]

Do you know onigiri? It is only the most delicious and perfect savory snack in the entire world, is what it is. I learned of it lo these many years ago, on a trip to Japan to visit a beloved friend of mine. On a courtesy break during a bus ride from Matsumoto to Tokyo, she bought snacks, and when she got back on the bus she handed me a sort of three-dimensional triangle of rice, the middle wrapped in nori, covered in plastic. I unwrapped it, bit into it, and Oh, oh! It was amazing. But when I got to the middle, that’s when I fell in love with onigiri forever: hiding in the center of that perfectly shaped triangle was an umeboshi. A whole one, its little pit intact. The flavor! The tangy rice, the roasted nori, the sharp salty umeboshi—and the textures! And the size of the onigiri, just right to hold in your hand, the rice shaped and packed and wrapped to prevent spilling! I swear, with enough fillings—no, let’s be honest—with enough umeboshi I could live on onigiri forever.

The glad tidings SFoodie brings us today, of a new food cart in Justin Herman Plaza called Onigilly, about blew my mind. And that two of the three onigiri fillings are vegan? O glorious day! Even better: Onigilly specifies which of their daily dishes are vegan! Seriously, I am dead. Dead of anticipatory happiness.

Sep 30, 20103 notes
#onigilly #onigiri #japanese #justin herman plaza #fidi #street food #street carts #sfoodie #meave gallagher
The Food Network says some vegetarian food is, uh, not

“Now, Lisa’s going through this phase where she doesn’t eat any meat, so I usually sneak a little meat juice into her vegetables.” —Marge Simpson

SuperVegan brings us some unsettling news today: according to a survey conducted by Food magazine, about 15 percent of chefs report that ” their vegetarian dishes might not be completely vegetarian.” Further, says Food, “Beware if you’re one of those super-picky vegan types: One chef reported seeing a cook pour lamb’s blood into a vegan’s primavera.”

Gross, right? Before the apoplexy blinds us all, let’s use our clever vegan brains to examine this analytically. Food says that they anonymously “surveyed chefs across the country,” but they provide no hard data at all, which renders this “about 15 percent” essentially meaningless. How many chefs are 15 percent? In which cities and states did the surveyed chefs live? Look, if your Vegansaurus surveyed vegans, and 95 percent of respondents agreed that humane treatment of farm animals was a “positive step” toward animal rights, what would you say? Hopefully, you’d ask the same questions—without hard data, surveys don’t mean much.

SuperVegan concludes that this survey answer is “just one more reason to avoid restaurants that have animals on their menus,” but your Vegansaurus respectfully disagrees. We encourage vegans to patronize non-veg restaurants all the time because they offer quality veg dishes. However, if they’re not actually vegan, that’s been a depressing waste of time and money. Don’t restaurants want business? Are they all so financially comfortable that they can afford to play with our food?

Presumably, 15 percent isn’t a huge number—15 if they asked 100 chefs, 30 if they asked 200, etc.—though we can’t know because we don’t have those figures. If chefs put vegetarian and vegan dishes on a menu, it should imply that they understand the terms and want to make food that abides by them. Of course, continue to eat at veg restaurants, we love those places the most! We love all restaurants that serve tasty, cruelty-free food. There are so many better things to lie about—what would putting lamb’s blood in a primavera even accomplish, honestly? If this survey makes you warier of eating at non-veg places, your Vegansaurus recommends asking specific, very polite questions of your server when placing your order.

And remember, always look at surveys as carefully as you do menus and ingredients lists!

Sep 30, 201010 notes
#food network #lies #supervegan #surveys #numbers #analysis
Our beloved Elizabeth Kucinich wants you! to support Healthy School Lunches!

The Improving Nutrition for America’s Children Act—gosh that sounds wholesome—otherwise known as H.R. 5504, has finally been placed on the House order of business. Unfortunately, the House is taking its “autumn recess” before voting on it, even though the previous legislation—a one-year extension of an even earlier bill—expires, oh, today. Good call, guys!

Elizabeth Kucinich is very concerned about how this will affect the public schoolchildren of the U.S. So is your Vegansaurus, actually. Our Laura worked extremely hard to help get language into this bill that would ensure veg options for public school kids, including non-dairy milk, and we really don’t want to lose that because of selfish politicians who require pork—literal or political!—to vote for any bill. Kids need healthy, tasty school lunches! And you know we aren’t concerned about CHILDHOOD OBESITY AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!! so much as just getting the kiddies a good, vegetable-protein-based meal five days a week. You always pay taxes; why not let some of them ($8 per taxpayer over the 2011 to 2015 period) go toward something you believe in?

You can help out immediately by calling or emailing your congressional representative today to express your support of H.R. 5504. We need to tell them all to make this their top priority when they return from their “autumn recess,” a.k.a. “campaigning break.” If you hate kids, do it for Elizabeth. If you don’t care about people at all, do it for the animals that won’t have to be killed for the veggie kids’ meals. If that doesn’t move you, do it for your favorite pink dinosaur!

Sep 30, 20103 notes
#couch activism #elizabeth kucinich #h.r. 5504 #healthy school lunches #house of representatives #mrs. q #pcrm #politics #meave gallagher
Sep 29, 20101 note
#candle 79 #desserts #marin #mill valley #whole foods #white whines #laura beck #gardein #chick'n
Sep 29, 201023 notes
#David Hornsby #Emily Deschanel #GIVE ME THAT DRESS GIVE IT TO ME!! #MAWWIED! #WE LOVE CELEBRITIES #events #feather love photography #let's give her an award too! #vegan weddings
Top Chef: Just Desserts, episode three airs tonight, and our third chef is revealed!

The third episode of Top Chef: Just Desserts airs on Bravo tonight (10 Eastern/Pacific), which means that we’re ready to unveil our third guest chef (see the first two here!) who will veganize the episode’s winning dessert! Have you been able to bear the suspense? We have, but just barely! Ohhhh, puns, can you take it?!

This week’s guest chef is the TOTALLY RAD Celine Steen of the hugely popular and highly delicious Have Cake, Will Travel! If you’ve spent more than two seconds on Have Cake, Will Travel, you know that Celine makes the most ridiculous-looking food EVER. If you haven’t tried to eat your screen while on her site, have your prescription checked, okaaaaay?? Not only that, she co-wrote the fabulous must-own cookbook 500 Vegan Recipes: An Amazing Variety of Delicious Recipes, From Chilis and Casseroles to Crumbles, Crisps, and Cookies. It’s epic. What’s more, she has TWO cookbooks coming out in 2011, The Complete Guide to Vegan Food Substitutions (GENIUS!) and Hearty Vegan Meals for Monster Appetites (MORE GENIUS!). No vegan (OR ANY) kitchen is complete without Celine’s website, cookbooks, and AMAZING food photography.

We love her and are so honored to have her tackle this week’s recipe, however insane/terrifying/complicated it might be. So enjoy Top Chef: Just Desserts tonight (if you want, no pressure, KILL YOUR TELEVISION! Unless you’re me and then IF YOU TOUCH MY TV IMMA MURDER YOU) and then check back with us next Monday to see Celine’s amazing veganization of the winning dish!

And now, your episode preview: Will our veganizer have to make A WEDDING CAKE? Or is this a preview of something completely different?


[can’t see the video? watch it at vegansaurus.com!]

Sep 29, 20101 note
#500 vegan recipes #MAN WE LOVE DESSERT #Top Chef: Just Desserts #bravo #celine steen #have cake will travel #project just desserts #tcjdlinks #video
Dead bear found discarded outside strip mall, or What the fucking hell is your problem, Humans?

SFist reported that a dead bear was found abandoned outside a strip mall taqueria in San Leandro late Sunday evening. Apparently, the 300-pound bear had been shot somewhere else and then transported to the strip mall, where it was left. It is black bear hunting season right now (which in and of itself deserves a resounding What the Fuck), but authorities don’t seem to think a licensed hunter, the most responsible and reputable of humans, would simply dump a black bear carcass on a taqueria’s doorstep.

Now, I was raised to live in stupefying fear of bears, not shoot and discard them. Bears will fuck you up good and proper, and after reading this story, I honestly wonder why they don’t do it more often. I’m no fan of hunting—I think it’s a bullshit excuse to act like a macho asshole, and most of the time, the arguments that say we “need” hunters to keep populations

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in check seems about as legit as the Williamsburg caveman diet—but simply throwing away a dead animal is such a fucking disrespectful piece-of-shit thing to do, I just can’t even articulate how sad and fucked up it is.

Sorry, bears.

To avoid bumming everyone out completely and totally, please check out the American Bear Association and their bear sanctuary in Minnesota; maybe shoot ‘em a couple bucks, become a member, or even sponsor a bear. Also, check out this heartwarming tale of two blind bears who were rescued and taken to a sanctuary in Romania. 

[Image courtesy American Bear Association]

Sep 29, 20108 notes
#jordan #people are assholes yet again #bears #sfist #black bears #hunting #san leandro #american bear association #hunting is the worst
What's wrong with organic eggs?

As new photos reveal, PLENTY. I’m sure I’m not the only one who finds that eggs are one of the most difficult foods to talk people out of. We’ve all had that conversation with that person who insists that they are totally down with your veganism but you see, they eat organic eggs, so there’s no, uh, foul. Try as I might to talk about the essential meaninglessness of feel-good labels like “free range” or “organic,” it can be hard to combat those pleasant misconceptions without any shocking, awful photo evidence.

(Un)Fortunately, we now have it.

The Cornucopia Institute, an organization that promotes family farms and more sustainable farming, visited 15 percent of egg farms in the United States, and released a report titled “Scrambled Eggs: Separating Factory Farm Egg Production from Authentic Organic Agriculture.” While the report is aimed at protecting the interests of smaller-scale family farmers rather than ending animal agriculture altogether, it’s a useful read for vegans looking to combat the “happy egg” myth.

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The conclusion of the report is something vegans should already know: most “organic” eggs aren’t really any different from regular eggs, with the sole exception that layer hens who produce “organic” eggs are fed “organic” food. The chickens are still kept confined in too-tight quarters, denied access to the outdoors, prevented from exhibiting their natural behaviors, and generally treated horribly their entire lives. To the large industrial farms examined in the report, “organic” is just another brand, and the current standards for what can be labeled as organic are a joke. The report shows how many of the larger producers are playing the system, providing “outdoor access” to chickens in the form of a tiny skylight or window.

What reports like this really mean is something everyone who eats food in this country needs to recognize: we can’t trust big agriculture to give us the food they’re marketing. If it’s cheap and convenient, chances are someone got screwed in its production. What’s the solution? This Vegansaur says cut it out with the eggs already. TOFU OMELETTES FOR LYFE!

Sep 29, 201019 notes
#cornucopia institute #jordan #tofu omelettes rule #treehugger #don't eat eggs #eggs #industrial agriculture #organic eggs #happy meat #organic valley
Hello friends, it's WTF Wednesday!

Well, hello there! Aren’t you looking attractive today! Almost as attractive as these dogs in a photo booth:

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[Photo from vi.sualize.us]

These dogs are not only looking awesome (SUNDAY BEST, MOTHERFUCKERS!) but are also emulating exactly what each one of us does in a photo booth: one regular photo and then three photos of insane making out. Even if you’re taking the photo alone. Which I usually am. That means it’s usually just one photo of me smiling for my mom and then three of me frantically tonguing the wall and crying. Life!

Last week I got an email (email me!) from Becki who lives halfway across the world (as soon as I got it I was all, “WHOA! STOP THE PRESSES! ALLEN I GOT A LETTER FROM SOMEWHERE IN EUROPE!” and Allen was all, “like a real letter? In one of those awesome envelopes?” and I said “SURE! EXACTLY LIKE THAT! BUT IN MY EMAIL!” and then Allen groaned at me and went back to sleep because he does not like to be disturbed at 3 a.m. Something about working in the morning. BORING!)! Becki wanted to share something great and uplifting with me (which will get its own post!) to combat some of the sadness of the last WTF Wednesday offerings. I’ve been thinking about that a lot, and so today we’re going to shatter the idea that WTF Wednesday has to be all doom and gloom! Because it doesn’t! It’s whatever we want it to be! It is like the ’70s! Except without STDs! Or, rather, with fewer STDs!

Let’s talk about Hamsters! First of all, hamsters are the world’s most perfect animal. I know that you may disagree with me, but you are wrong. And this has nothing to do with the fact that I went vegetarian because I adopted a hamster off the street. I AM NOT BIASED AT ALL! You want more proof? You ever see a wombat (very cute!) wielding a chainsaw? You ever see a prairie dog (adorable!) playing rap? You may not know this but Hamsters are OGs (and I am not talking OLIVE GARDEN!). Bunny (R.I.P. BIG POPPA!) used to terrorize bigger animals all the time! She taught my other hamsters how to escape their cages! She once tossed a piece of corn at someone for looking at her wrong! If Bunny were with us today, I’m sure she could have taught these hip-hop HAMSTAZ a thing or two!  Sadly, there was one thing Bunny couldn’t do: she couldn’t play an instrument, so she was never able to join a jazz trio. I will never forgive myself for not encouraging her love of music.

Then there are pandas! Yes, I know! You’ve seen the baby panda sneezing? An oldie but a goody! BUT have you seen this panda have a sneezing fit? No, you go ahead! I will just wait patiently until you finish convulsing in reaction to all of the cute flooding your system. But why leave it at pandas? Do other animals not sneeze? Isn’t there a baby elephant, perhaps, sneezing itself silly somewhere? Why yes, YES THERE IS! Let’s just stop this before we both pass out! Let’s go look at something sparkly!

Laura just hepped me (lolz!) to this awesome video of people dressed as MY LITTLE PONY doing musicals. First, horses and ponies are so rad, and I love reading good stories about them, AND ALSO HATE reading bad news (everyone help the wild horses!). Secondly, when that blue pony is doing “Defying Gravity” and climbs up onto the ramp to sing the grand finale, I almost cried. Not only because it is a fucking pony singing and dancing,* but because it wanted to keep the INTEGRITY of the original staging! Why is there not more stuff like this on the internet? Usually you just get this guy doing songs from A Chorus Line with the most dramatic head rolls I’ve ever seen. How does he not give himself whiplash? He used to do an amazing cover of “Part of Your World,” and although this is not his original version, the CAMERA WORK and props are amazing. I wish he wouldn’t refer to him as a “boy” in the song, though. You’re going to do Little Mermaid? You’ve got to OWN Little Mermaid, like Abby and I did for Hazel’s benefit! Fuck it, here we are being fabulous:


[can’t see the video? watch it at vegansaurus.com!]

Boy, am I exhausted! You know what would counteract that (besides not receiving any more lectures from Allen for waking him up at night for no good reason when he has to put up with me all day already AND JESUS, MARK!)? If you would send me links that would make you happy to see on Vegansaurus! Links to articles and videos that gave you pause and/or made you think “oh my god, what is UP with that?”

And puppies! You see those puppies up there? We can have that EVERY WEEK! And it’s all up to you! and my editor [Ed.: Damn skippy, crazy!]. But mostly YOU! AT LEAST 89 PERCENT YOU!

Have an awesome day!

Sep 29, 20103 notes
#amazing animals #animals sneezing OMG #cute animal videos GALORE #elephants #hamsters #i want to be those pit bulls #mark shrayber #my little pony #pandas #pit bulls #ponies #this should be called CUTE ANIMAL VIDEO WEDNESDAY #wtf wednesday #video #submission
Cinnaholic needs our help!

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Vegans! And friends of vegans! And lovers of all things delicious! AN ANNOUNCEMENT: Our most favorites, Cinnaholic, is in a tight spot with cash and needs a little extra to pull through this month. You can help, and here’s how: buy a gift certificate for deeeeeeeelicious cinnamon rolls now, and you redeem it, plus 15 percent of its original value, in December. You’re giving them a micro-loan because they’re fucking rad and their cinnamon rolls are magic, and then you reap the rewards after just nine weeks! DO IT! And buy one for your friends! And your mom! (And ME GIVE TO ME!)

Sep 29, 20106 notes
#HELP A VEGAN! #cinnaholic #deals and steals #vegans unite! #laura beck
Animal-welfare news sways meat consumers

Some good news! Meat eaters don’t like hearing about shitty conditions animals live and die in, so let’s keep reminding them! Every chance we get! In a non-preachy, non-offensive way, of course. I know, our job is never easy, but we’re not the ones crowded into CAFO’s breathing in the shit of our friends and family while we wait to die, right? GOOD MORNING! I AM A BUNDLE OF SUNSHINE AND LIGHT! Now, get out there and do your part to keep animal news in the news and get active and vocal for the animals. Ow!

[Thanks for the link, Paul!]

Sep 29, 20107 notes
#upi #meat eaters don't like hearing about the animals they eat? GOOD #news #let's legislate!
Sep 29, 201033,428 notes
#I BELIEVE THE CHILDREN ARE OUR FUTURE FEED THEM CHICKEN PARTS AND LET THEM ALL DIE BEFORE THEY'RE TEN #OMG DISGUSTING #chickens #how things are made! #parts is parts #reblog #sadness #the world is fucked #would be so much better if that were vegan taffy #laura beck
Our visit to the Donut Farm! Oakland gets better by the day!

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Laura writes:

Donuts from Oakland’s new Donut Farm!  Well, not totally new, it’s Pepples Donuts but in a funky fresh (best words to describe this place, trust) new location with lots of excellent new flavors we haven’t seen before. In the box are Fresh Strawberry, Salted Caramel, Old Fashioned, and Philz Coffee! HOT DAMN! all-vegan, all-organic, all-tasty as shit. Or, a lot tastier than shit, as it were. Can’t think, too hot.

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It’s cash-only, and the one thing they sell besides donuts is coffee. (Except Wednesdays, when the awesome ladies of Fat Bottom Bakery make a vegan cupcake delivery. Which we forwent to bring you this report today. Sacrifices!) Kinda perfect.

Donut Farm is in Oakland at 6037 San Pablo (at 61st St.), Open  Monday thru Thursday 9 a.m.-6 p.m, Friday & Saturday 9 a.m. “till late.”)

Sep 28, 20103 notes
#donut farm #fat bottom bakery #laura beck #oakland #pepples donuts #philz coffee #vegan donuts #donuts
Peta's 30th Anniversary Gala: Celebrities winning awards for being naked!

We dig much of the actual work that Peta does, but as vegans, it’s disappointing to see an animal-rights group give Humanitarian Awards to celebrities who eat meat, dairy, and eggs, and who wear silk, wool, and leather. It’s like, YAY! You’re a little bit famous! And you don’t wear fur! For now! Here are awards and acclaim and goodie bags for Taking a Stand in the ultra-conservative cold-weather climate of Los Angeles.

It’s all just a bit of a letdown. In the Peta theme of all publicity is good publicity (???), here’s our breakdown of the awards:

Eli Roth (barf) received a Humanitarian Award for posing with an enormous snake to raise awareness of animal cruelty.

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(Would this face condone ultra-violent misogyny?)

Christian Serratos (WHO??? oh, she who played “Angela” in Twilight) received a Humanitarian Award for posing naked in the “I’d Rather Go Naked Than Wear Fur” ad series, and participating in the “Save the Seals” celebrity ad series.

Dave Navarro (Finally! A name we recognize! FOR BEING A PROFESSIONAL CRAZY PERSON. Oh, and for being married to the biggest idiot in recorded history) received a Humanitarian Award for posing naked in an “Ink, Not Mink” ad.

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(KD Lang after a bender)

Olivia Munn received a Humanitarian Award for posing naked to protest elephants in the circus.

Joanna Krupa, professional good-looking person NO REALLY WILL SOMEONE TELLS US WHO THESE PEOPLE ARE, received a Humanitarian Award for posing naked in two pro-animal-adoption ads titled “Be an Angel to Animals,” and for posing naked in the “I’d Rather Go Naked Than Wear Fur” series.

Non-famous persons Emily McCoy and Emily Lavender/Rose McCoy (WHO?? the awards page says “Emily and Rose McCoy” but the news info page credits “Emily McCoy and Emily Lavender”) received a Humanitarian Award for protesting the Canadian seal hunt at a conference for the Fisheries Council of Canada on Oct. 28, 2009. No, really.

Kelly Osbourne received an award from us for being the strangest-looking skinny person in all the land. You can’t shrink the size of your head, Kelly! 

BRING BACK THE CUTE-ASS CHUB!

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(What hath Phen-phen wrought?)

Kellan Lutz (WHO?? Oh, who played “Emmett” in Twilight) received a Humanitarian Award for posing with his dog to raise awareness of animal adoption.

Charo (OH HELL YEAH) received a Humanitarian Award for making an anti-bullfighting video.

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(What is there to say really? If we look this good/are alive when we’re a hundred, we’ll be rocking this exact same outfit.)

Lea Michele received a Humanitarian Award for posing in an ad to protest carriage-horse abuse in New York City.

Eva Mendes received a Humanitarian Award for posing naked in the “I’d Rather Go Naked Than Wear Fur” ad series. She’s very pretty, we’ll give her that. 

Anjelica Huston received a Humanitarian Award for her video protesting the use of great apes in the entertainment industry. We cannot make fun as she is the greatest actor of our generation(s) and starred in The Witches and we will love her forever and ever.

Non-famous person Christina Cho received the Nanci Alexander Award for turning her vehicle into a McCruelty-mobile.

Dan Neri received the Bea Arthur Activist Award for his work on the ABC (Animal Birth Control) ad campaign. 

Shirley Manson receives an award from us for stopping making music. GOOD JOB! Also, for having the fiercest hair in the western hemisphere.

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(WORK IT, Ginger! Also, you were a total badass T-1000, we’re ascurred!)

And then there’s the usual crazy suspect:
Pamela Anderson(-Lee? -Kid Rock? -Some other rock n’ roll bad-boy/professional weirdo?), Peta’s Queen, looking amazing. We have mad respect for this total lunatic. She is so sexxxy and soooo insaaane that we must bow down. Plus, she has the boobs of a 400-pound woman on a 98-pound frame WORK IT, CRAZY.

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(Nice sunglasses!)

AND OF COURSE, Joaquin Phoenix, who was probably in character and ate someone that night.

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(Don’t fuck with him, son! He might be playing Richard Ramirez for his next film or some shit!)

[With additional reporting from Laura! All photos from Peta!]

Sep 28, 20104 notes
#can you believe this shit? #celebrities #humanitarian awards #peta #peta GOD #seriously #laura beck #meave gallagher
Advertising beat: McDonald's is for Old Spice-lovers, please


[can’t see the video? watch it on vegansaurus.com!]

Since our sneakers correspondent is also our crack advertising reporter, and that Megan Rascal is still gallivanting about Europe, we’re on the advertising beat today! This 30-second spot hasn’t aired on U.S. television yet, but presumably it will, considering how hard commercial media want us to admire/be/get wet for dudes who do Manly Things. The manliest thing a man has ever done, of course, is stuffed some meat down his gullet. Also, the voiceover guy has an “American” accent, and you know ‘murrican Manly Men don’t respond to “foreign” voices—unless they’re selling “foreign” products, like Dos Equis beer, or Grey Poupon mustard.

Obviously McDonald’s can’t pretend their products are anything but chemically enhanced food-like substances, so now they’re making an appeal to the same people Manly Men who are all about smelling like Old Spice and bringing back chivalry. Cool idea, so original! You all are the smartest ever. Maybe it’s all the sodium that reminds you, a Manly Man, of your innate responsibility to open doors for Ladies. Maybe it’s the weird dairy products in the processed cheese-food that give you super-strong hands!* Or maybe all that gnarly cholesterol is actually brain food, and BAM you can fix cars you’ve never even seen before! Honestly, we have no idea; as vegans, we’ll never eat that much cholesterol, and most of your Vegansaurus was born XX, so we’re doubly stupid about the wondrous effects of McDonald’s on Manly (Omnivorous) Men.

Has anyone is Australia seen this commercial yet? Does it make you want to puke as much as we wanted to when we watched it? This play-pretend admiration of the super-fixed gender roles of the last century is unbelievably fucking stupid—it’s not even a binary!—and emphasizing its importance is pathetic. We are moving on from “Manly,” and we’re moving on from McDonald’s. If you want to make it in this century, you’d better evolve, you creeps.

*Note to fellow homo sapiens without much hand strength: wrap a rubber band around the lid of the jar. That provides much more traction than those ridiculous rubber opener-things and you can leave it on the jar for future use. It is brilliant and amazing and another small way of maintaining your independence.

Sep 28, 20103 notes
#I am not turned on by this #advertising #burgerbusiness.com #commercials #gender roles #mcdonald's #meat is not manly #australia #sociological images #chivalry is dead #burn it all down #meave gallagher
Sep 28, 20108 notes
#vegweb #HOT AS SHIT #sweatin balls #god help us #bay area whines #RECIPES! #vegweb.com
Operation Second Chance: Dogs behind bars!

Is that not an awesome mental image? Just some rad female pit bulls in a Caged Heat 3000-type movie? No? OK, well here’s something even better!

In Kwame Anthony Appiah’s excellent Washington Post piece, “What will future generations condemn us for?” he said that our children’s children would be ashamed not only of factory farming, but also of our current prison system. We couldn’t agree more, and we’ve got an example of one place that’s putting a Band-Aid on the gash that is our fucked “correctional facilities.” Woohoo!

Karmalized Pictures is an eco-friendly, vegetarian film company—awesome in itself, but then their name also makes me think of caramelized onions, which makes me happy! Good job, guys!—that has put out a film called Jail Dogs in 1C about Operation Second Chance. Operation Second Chance is an excellent program created and run by the Society of Humane Friends of Georgia and the Gwinnett County, Ga., Sheriff’s Office. It pairs death-row doggies with carefully selected inmates at the county jail, allowing them to give back to their community while still incarcerated. Dogs helping prisoners helping dogs. So wonderful.

image


(This is Jake and his trainer Reed; they’re best buddies now!)

The dogs live with the men 24/7 while the inmates are training them. This helps the dogs learn social skills, making them more adoptable, and teaches the men valuable skills and responsibility. It’s also been changing a lot of lives. Some of the men are learning to love someone for the first time and others say that these dogs have really raised their self-esteem and make them feel that they are worth something. You can’t put a price on that!

It’s also delightful to know that Gwinnett County Sherriff Butch Conway not only pushed to institute this Operation Second Chance, but has been a proponent of it for many years. It’s nice to see a sheriff who recognizes the value in rehabilitation, rather than focusing on punishment! Just all-around awesome good times. My only issue with the program is that they don’t seem to involve the female inmates. Is there even a women’s jail in Gwinnett county? Google? What’s THAT? Who’s he? Anyway, I bet since it’s so successful they’ll expand and include rehab for ladies, too.

image


(That’s Rex! We’re told “he’s one happy dog and everyone loves him!”)

For more information about the program, visit the Society of Humane Friends or Operation Second Chance websites.


[can’t see the video? watch it at vegansaurus.com!]

Sep 27, 20102 notes
#amazing dogs #dogs with jobs #making us cry #our fucked justice system #prisons #rehabilitation #georgia #gwinnett county #mark shrayber #jail dogs in 1c #karmalized pictures #society of humane friends of georgia #video #submission
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