vegansaurus!

Mark is the cranky one.

You guys, I had a really good week in Modesto. I was really concerned about what I would do so I brought along every craft, portable video game system and textbook that I needed to write a lecture from. Then I spent my time eating Field Roast and napping. And abusing NSAIDs. I even got through about 10 hours of Final Fantasy VII before I realized that the entire game was approximately six hundred hours long and decided that I just could not make the commitment. When I told Allen this he said ” that game cost seven dollars. You’d better finish it!” Then he went back to watching 27 Dresses on non-cable television.

Allen loves to watch movies on TV, even though the movies he watches are movies he owns on DVD. In fact, they are movies I bought him on DVD. During the past week he has watched Up twice and been excited and surprised every time it came on. This is a movie that Allen owns the special-edition of and is still in its packaging. When I mention Allen’s behavior to him, he just says that watching movies on TV is fun, and that I need to either lighten up or finish the game I paid $7 for. Because nothing makes more sense than a person who will chastise me for not finishing a video game but will happily watch movies that he has paid for and that are five feet away from him on network television with frequent commercial interruptions. The result of this logic makes my head explode and Allen has to face the consequences of putting it back together and screwing it back on to my shoulders.

Consequences, by the way, are really important. While trolling around the Internet during a pre-nap relaxation hour I found out that one of the consequences of messing with a cat is getting the shit beaten out of you. I really hope that the little monster in this video has to watch this on a daily basis, because it will teach him two important things. First of all, don’t hit living things even if you perceive that they are weaker than you; second, those living things might fight back. No matter what logic you use, it is impossible to blame the cat for giving the kid what he deserved. One time, I reached into Bunny’s cage when she was sleeping and she bit me so hard I almost blacked out. You know what I learned from that? Not to disturb her when she is sleeping. What I hope this kid learns is that you don’t try to squash a cat with your fist. What I hope this kid’s parents learn is not to videotape their kid crying, and perhaps invite him to a visit with a practicing therapist. If you’re jonesing for a video where the cat is the aggressor, scroll down the same page and watch an adorable middle-aged baby get sucker-punched like a boss.

Besides douchebag babies, animals also seem to hate phones. Check them freaking the fuck out when commercials for the iPhone come on (animals are very cost-conscious) and kicking over the phone when it rings and disturbs their beauty rest. That is totally something I would do if I were a pet, too. Just knock shit over to let my people know that I do not have Stockholm syndrome. Ms. Cleo’s been doing that a lot. That and not letting me change her litterbox. I swear, every time I go to empty it she freaks out like I am stealing precious diamonds from her. Allen won’t even go near that because he is so frightened she will take a finger off. She has not been responding so well to Spanish.

That’s it for this week. Please send me links for next week and have a bite-free Wednesday!

Hey guys! I’ve got another deal for you. Lollihop has decided to make their vegan boxes a regular thing! So you can get a whole year’s subscription if you want! That is good news but I have even gooder news: The first 50 people to use the coupon code VEGANSAURUS20 when they buy a Lollihop gift subscription* will get 20 percent off their order! SWEET. 

You have to order by Thursday, Dec. 1 to get the Dec. 15 delivery but like I said, it’s permanent, so don’t fret if you order later. But I was like, Lollihop, how will they know if they are in the first 50? And they told me that the discount will show up before you finally check out. I didn’t want you guys buying anything without knowing the price! But you’ll see it before you finish checking out.

Remember, this discount is only for the first 50 people who order. OMG it’s like I’m turning you against each other! No, no, you’ll be OK. Godspeed. I hear vegans bite.

*Correction: The code only works for the gift subscriptions. But I guess you could gift it to yourself!

It looks like the same crew as our beloved Beats ‘n’ Brunch (maybe? Someone say shit if we’re wrong!) and it’s at Little Baobab in the Mission and so yeah, I’m calling it: Beats ‘n’ Brunch is back Update: Awesome people who loved Beats ‘n’ Brunch are putting this on, though they aren’t associated with B ‘n’ B.

They’re calling it B12: Bomb Vegan Brunch, and it appears to be one weekend only, Saturday and Sunday, Dec. 3 and 4! You should get up on it! The menu is TK but it’ll most likely be delicious, and here are the details from their Facebook event:

Somebody set us up the bomb!

We are extra-excited about this go-round of weekend brunch at Little Baobab with an all-vegan extravaganza by guest chefs Katherine Rae and Julia Russotti and delicious beats from DJs Manitous and Matt Haze. 

Saturday, Dec. 3, and Sunday, Dec. 4, from 10 a.m. to 3 p.m.

Bring an appetite for this one - this menu is hearty, satisfying and diverse as brunch should be!

Consider yourself warned! Be there or be sad at home eating some kind of oatmeal that you’ve convinced yourself tastes like delicious dessert—it does not.

Now, let us stare at some delicious Korean pancakes from a previous Beats ‘n’ Brunch:

Bunny’s Dream Gift Basket, donated by The Busy Bunny. Click to bid!

The House Rabbit Society and the East Bay Rabbit Rescue have joined forces to host this online auction of rabbit gifts and art! All proceeds go to an emergency medical fund for these two worthy organizations. They’ve got studio sessions with photographer Mark Rogers (get a fancy photo of you and your pet! Bunny or not!), watercolors and mosaics and other rabbitty artwork, and giftcards to Pet Express—all kinds of good stuff to get and receive.

Astrid, by John Beahm. Click to bid!

All the action is happening on Facebook, but you can also bid by calling the Rabbit Center at (510) 970.7575 between noon and 5 p.m., Tuesday through Friday. The auction ends at 1 p.m. on Tuesday, Dec. 6, so get to bidding for the buns!

You will never guess what happened to Matt Damon after he attended a bullfight in Mexico City: He got a phone call from PETA, demanding an explanation! To which he responded with not only an explanation, but an apology.

Jane Dollinger for PETA has reportedly stated, “Matt said that he went to the bullfight believing that bullfights should be stopped but felt that he should see the cruelty for himself while he was in Mexico. He said that seeing with his own eyes what these tormented animals go through only reinforced an already strongly held belief that bullfights should be relegated to the history books.

“He also said that he was upset to think that his attendance was in any way construed to be an endorsement of such a barbaric activity.”

Matt Damon at the bullfight.

I’m having a hard time being mad at him for this [Ed. note: Read: Jenny totally wants to hit that! Myself, I don’t buy his, “I didn’t know” routine. Don’t play dumb with me, Matty!]. I mean, bullfights, awful, for real! Good for PETA for getting to the bottom of the situation, right? I guess I could get behind a Matt Damon campaign for PETA. Don’t you want to see Ben Affleck in it too? I miss those guys together. So long as they aren’t wearing leather jackets, feather earrings or some other bullshit in their very special celebrity PETA poster. Ah! Pun not intended.

Actually, I really despise the PETA campaigns featuring celebs who eat meat. It seems hypocritical to me, like “I love animals, stop abusing them, BUT I ALSO REALLY LOVE EATING THEM!” Or, “I’d never wear fur, but I’ll wear a meat dress to an awards show.”
Maybe he should stay away from PETA, but still work to stop this atrocious spectacle of tormenting bulls for entertainment.

In more Matt Damon news, PETA has already addressed his movie We Bought a Zoo [Ed. note: oy, that movie makes me want to vom! War Horse too, War Horse can kiss my ass], and he helped start the charity Water.org.

Erin from Foursquare informed us that they now have an Herbivore badge for cool veggie Foursquare users like us! Or like me, at least! Yes, I’m a Foursquare lover. But I don’t check in EVERYWHERE, just at places I like or am proud to be. So YOU KNOW I always check in at veggie restaurants! Now I can’t wait to unlock this badge! It’s not a pink T. rex but it’s still a dino!

Erin says she is the only vegan at Foursquare, so we need to represent: “I want to see more users unlock this badge than the fried chicken, diner, and bbq badges—combined!” We can do it!

And keep an eye out; we are going to make a Vegansaurus Foursquare tips page. I’ll let you know when it’s ready!

Last year your Vegansaurus contributors put together a little donation guide with a few of our favorite charities, to make your non-consumerist gift-giving that much easier. We also received some great reader suggestions, so I thought this year, let’s open it up to the readers, too.

What are your favorite charities? What causes don’t get the support they deserve? We want to know! Please send your suggestions, including pertinent links and a brief description of the organizations and why you love them, no later than Monday, Dec. 5. I’ll collect them, along with our wonderful contributors’ ideas, and post the 2011 Vegansaurus charity guide in plenty of time for this year’s winter holidays.

[photo by Mary L. via Flickr]

SFist has the word and we’re trying to get to the bottom of it! Café Gratitude, why you have to be so crazy? Can’t you just serve up your delicious kale bowls and key lime cheesecake and STOP BEING A CULT? So annoyed at them. SO ANNOYED! Where will I get my delicious coffee shakes?? THIS IS UNACCEPTABLE, GODDAMMIT, GRATITUDE! My question of the day is: “WTF YOU GUYS!?”

More TK because we’re hella going New Tales of Sherlock Holmes on this shit.

[yeah, right!!]

UPDATE: SFist talked to Shandra Gilbert, Gratitude’s Director of Operations, who explained to us that, yes, Gracias Madre is also up for sale. Alas.

Et tu, Gracias Madre!??!!?

UPDATE 2: We now know for a fact that many employees (like, higher-up employees) had NO CLUE this was happening. They found out via SFist. Really nice, Café Gratitude.

UPDATE 3: We talked to Steve Sommers of Kumin Sommers LLC, who filed the two current lawsuits against Café Gratitude. He told us some interesting things! They mainly concern their tip-pooling practice, which goes like this: Every penny generated in tips and sales goes into same pool of money. At end of the day, they tabulate how much they should have earned from food sales, and they remove that amount from the pool— this, says Sommers, is called “breakage,” and it “shoulders the risk of the business onto the employees,” and is illegal. Next, they take 20 percent from the remaining money and send it to the central kitchen. Finally, they divide the remaining money among all the employees, from the managers to the janitors. Sommers says that one of his clients, Sara Stevens, would collect $200 in tips per night and only pocket $40. She is suing for between $80,000 and $85,000 in lost tips, and missed fuel and rest breaks.

The second lawsuit comes from their CURRENT—as in, he was still an employee as of 2:30 p.m. today, when we spoke with Sommers—bookkeeper, Ravi Shankar. He was being paid a salary as an exempt employee, which is illegal, and is suing for about $60,000 in overtime pay.

Sommers says that they have offered to let the Engelharts—Gratitude’s owners—“pay over time, if it’s a matter of money,” but by closing all their Northern California restaurants “they are scapegoating these two people.” Sommers also notes that once he filed these suits, Gratitude purchased three industrial shredders. “What are they hiding?” he asks.

It’s a legitimate question!

Also of note: These suits are entirely unconnected with Landmark and all that weirdness the East Bay Express wrote about in 2009.

UPDATE 4: Just heard from another (current) employee who said that they’re for sure being sold and that so is Gracias Madre, and it looks like there might already be a buyer for Gracias Madre, and it’s a big corporation. They didn’t tell the employees who the big corporation is (we’re thinking of starting the rumor that it’s McDonald’s! You in!?), but all Café Gratitude employees and central kitchen employees are getting fired. Super sad and shitty.

UPDATE 5: We just got news from a tipster (thank you!) that the Gratitude’s commercial kitchen and offices building on 14th Street is for sale. Asking price is $1.895 million, agent is Rob Maccarone at TRI Commercial. Check out the brochure here.

What time is it? SHOPPING TIME. And as a thoughtful, stylish vegan consumer, you want to give presents that your friends and family will cherish forever. Or, you want to buy yourself stuff because you’re tired and it’s only Tuesday but it’s almost December, where does the time go, you deserve a present.

Vegan Cuts to the rescue! This week only, they’re selling two Vaute Couture tees for 25 percent off! One style is brand new! They are both adorable, made of sustainable, fair-trade materials, and really the biggest problem here is deciding which one you want, because you’re limited to one per person.

Maybe get your friend to buy one and you buy the other and you can share them! Or convince your relations that they should buy one of each style and give them both to you! Or, you know, buy one as a gift for someone you love, because now is the season of being less selfish.

The deal expires this weekend, so get to Vegan Cuts and buy a shirt! Only if you like deals and shirts, though. Maybe saving money and putting fabric on your body aren’t your things. That just means more awesome clothes for the rest of us.

This is Allie and Noah, two South San Franciscans who need a new home. This is a very special pair of cats: Noah is blind and Allie has taken on the role of his “guide cat.” Their former owners, who are being being sent to Korea by the army, put a collar with a bell on Allie so Noah would always know where she is. A few days after they put the bell on Allie, Noah was getting around the house like a champ. Initially, Noah followed Allie around but now that he’s more confident, he leads the way with Allie close behind to make sure he’s all right. Allie sleeps with Noah and helps him groom himself. She even checks the litter box after he uses it to make sure he sufficiently covered his business.

Aren’t animals the sweetest? Always taking care of each other. And look at Noah’s eyes, so big! They don’t know why he went blind shortly after birth but they think, because of the size of his eyes, that it may just be a birth defect. Allie looks just like my little Mitsy and Mitsy is the best cat ever. Do we have any other owners of gray cats in the crowd? I think they must be the best! 

Allie and Noah are being fostered by the Nine Lives Foundation. If you can help the pair, call Debbie Mueller at (650) 670-7056.

It’s that time between the two major holiday meals, where you have two choices: take it easy, eat some veggies, maybe do a juice cleanse OR GO FULL SPEED AHEAD, EAT EVERYTHING, after all, swimsuit season is so far away! I’m somewhere in the middle—I guess it’s not so black-and-white. One thing I do want to do in this time is incorporate more raw foods in my diet. And OhDeerChocolates has sprung up on Etsy at the most perfect time!

Sara Malazzo-Miller, creator of OhDeerChocolates, is selling her e-cookbook for the low price of $8, for this week only! Her 20+ cookie, truffle, and candy recipes are raw, vegan and CHOCOLATE!

OhDeerChocolates’ chocolate mousse.

Raw dessert—it’s like health food. At least that’s my motto! Sara is also donating 100 percent of the profits to wildlife rescue centers. Now that’s the holiday spirit!

Happy news! When you use the coupon code “VEGANSAURUS” on Boygirlparty’s Etsy store, you will get 10 percent off your order AND Boygirlparty will donate an additional 10 percent of the sale to the Woodstock Farm Animal Sanctuary! Huzzah! The Woodstock Farm Animal Sanctuary is a magical place that deserves our help, PLUS this stuff is so cute! It’s a win-win! Bonus: Susie Ghahremani, the crazy talented artist behind Boygirlparty, is super committed to eco-friendly printing—a win-win-win!

Susie also says that if you want to forgo your discount, she will donate 20 percent of your purchase to the Woodstock Farm Animal Sanctuary—just don’t use the coupon code and leave a note at checkout! You saintly bastard! 

Everything in her store is adorbs, but here are my favorite things! First of all, try not to die from the sweetness of these mini notebooks:

I want to take these tiny books and write tiny genius thoughts in them.

And I love this octopus to-do list notepad:

I don’t know if your mom is anything like mine, but my mom is ALL ABOUT to-do lists. Like, cray cray. I’m sure any to-do list enthusiast would be super happy to get this! Or get it for yourself and get your shit done in the cutest way possible. 

Susie has also created a bunch of sweet recipe cards, like this elephant one:

Kick it old-school with handwritten recipes! Or bust out the typewriter and type them up. People will think you are cool.

The holidays are coming up and a nice notebook like this owl one always makes a good present:

It’s cute and useful! And in these superficial and overcrowded times, it’s all about the aesthetics of utility. That’s my word.

There’s also a ton of really pretty cards but I especially like this bird notecard set:

It’s super classy to mail people cards. Nobody does it anymore. People don’t even give cards with presents! But you give someone this card and they can stand it up like a little piece of art and you will be an old-world hero. 

So those are my top picks! Susie also has great shirts and jewelry so check those out as well. Now, get to shoppin’ for a good cause!

[All photos by Renée Chartier]