We love the SF SPCA and we love adopted animals,* which makes this weekend’s Homecoming Adoptathon an ideal even for those of us—you, me, everyone else—without a companion animal to find one, already, and fill that hole our hearts we are currently stuffing artisan vegan cheese into with a furry creature who really will love us back. Fuck a human friend, what you want is an animal. Dogs don’t think you drink too much! Cats maybe are a little concerned with your “professional” wardrobe but they would never say so. And bunnies are never too tired to greet after another endless workday with a full minute of I-love-you hops.
The SF SPCA is ready to help you remedy that forever alone situation this weekend, with two days of adoptathon fun. On Friday, Sept. 14, get down with free booze and free adoptions, plus food from Voodoo Van, which appears to have one vegan option (though you’ll be in the Mission, legit snacks won’t be far off); adoptions are on from 1 to 8 p.m., reception from 5 to 9 p.m. Then on Saturday, Sept. 15, from 10 a.m. to 6 p.m., continue wooing the animal companion of your dreams with free adoptions, plus a foster care bake sale, and Q&A with a trainer. You know you have to train your dog if you adopt one, right? An untrained dog is an unhappy dog! Plus you can’t take it to the park to play with the other dogs if s/he never learned to socialize. The adoptathon continues on Sunday, Sept. 16, from 10 a.m. to 6 p.m., with more free adoptions and more bake sale.
Are you ready for a furry best friend of your very own? Maybe a dog small enough to put in a large bag, who loves to catch (soft!) frisbees and curl up behind your knees for an afternoon nap? Or someone with big paws and jaws to wrestle with? Someone to call your “four-legged child” because you and your partner aren’t into human kids? The SF SPCA wants to make those dreams come true this weekend. So get over there and make yourself and a lonely animal happy.
For more information, visit the SF SPCA online.
*Yes, Vegansaurus is built on relentless, hyperbolic enthusiasm, but we really do love you.