vegansaurus!

» GOOP on BLAT. Ugh, why with the disgusting acronyms!?

Gwyneth Paltrow’s latest GOOP newsletter has some vegan recipes from Gwynie herself. GODDAMMIT FOR MAKING ME HATE YOU LESS. Hopefully this awful feeling will pass soon. Brb, gonna go look at a poster from Shallow Hal. Ahh, yes. Better. My unbridled hate has returned and all is right in the world. I seriously want to throw this bitch out a window. She is so bad for women. I’m gonna tie her and Kristy Alley to an anchor and throw ‘em overboard. FROM THE TITANIC*.

I don’t really want her to die, I just want her to erase the memory of her existence in my brain. Kinda like Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind 2. Let’s get this greenlighted, people!

*Just ‘cause you gotta be extra careful with these bitches.