Mission Burger is CANCELING ITS VEGAN BURGER OH DEAR GOD NO »
Unfortunately, yes we will cancel it pretty soon because it takes a lot of work to make and was sort of just a labor of love—love we lost a few weeks ago when people complained about frying a piece of battered fish in the same deep fryer as the vegan patty. Even though that was a one time contamination, we just don’t want to make any vegans upset in the future.
Maybe we’ll bring it back some day when our broken hearts have had a chance to mend a little.
Vegans. This is a call to arms. We must get into Mission Burger TODAY and buy vegan burgers and tell the good people of MB that we want, nay NEED, our vegan burger. Please, if you ever loved me, you will do this.
Also, I’ve written a response to Mission Burger below. I will also post this on Yelp and email it to them and post it on their window and write it on my chest and run naked through the streets I WILL DO WHAT IT TAKES.
Dear Mission Burger,
Please don’t do this. We love that vegan burger more than we love most humans and animals (AND WE’RE VEGAN! THAT MEANS WE LOVE ANIMALS A LOT!). We know that the fish contamination was a one-time thing and totally trust your practices and think you are awesome. Also, as we may have mentioned, we live our sad lives waiting for our next hit of vegan burger. IT IS SO GOOD. In fact, we’ve had several omnis who have tried both burgers tell us that the vegan one is ten times the burger. Please don’t take it away from us. Please. We are prepared to give you babies blood, our first borns, and delicious cupcakes if you will PLEASE GOD reconsider.
Vegansaurus & THE MILLION BILLION OTHER VEGANS, VEGETARIANS, AND OPEN-MINDED OMNIS WHO LOVE THE VEGAN BURGER MORE THAN THEIR FREEDOM.
p.s. AND I AIN’T ONE TO GOSSIP SO YOU DIDN’T HEAR THIS FROM ME BUT the one person we heard who complained about the fish fryer mix-up wasn’t even vegan, she was an uppity vegetarian! Please don’t punish the vegans for a vegetarian’s folly. Also, I will say this. I know most vegans who eat out at places that aren’t totally vegan are aware that some non-vegan stuff might get into their food. We hope kitchens will do their best to make sure that doesn’t happen, but let’s be real. It’s like not expecting rat dander or sweaty-chef sweat in your food: it’s the price you pay when you eat out. If you’re not okay with that, then definitely don’t leave your house and maybe consider investing in a bubble.