NEW VEGAN ICE CREAM ALERT!! ALSO A FIRE!!!
Now that I have your attention. New local non-dairy raw(-ish?) ice cream, Alkemie, hits the shelves at Bay Area Whole Foods! It’s available in a small variety of flavors, like vanilla bean and mint chocolate chip (UGH SOME CREATIVITY PLEASE, I’d love a double-chocolate cookie dough crunch fantasy with marshmallows and teddy grahams, PLEASE GOD IS THAT TOO MUCH TO ASK!? And before you say boo, I know some of you are purists. Just know your place as an Undeserving Poor and shut yer yaps!),
Anyway, it’s on sale now for $5.99 a pint. The Chronicle Food & Wine staff gave it a thumbs-up as a non-dairy product, for what that’s worth. Probably not much because that article appears to be written by a moron. There are tons of non-dairy ice creams that aren’t soy-based already on the market, especially in the Bay Area. Get it together, Chron, you sound like my Grandpa. Actually, my Grandpa was a lot cooler than you.
I’m really into offending people today, you’re all lovely. I apologize.
(Thanks, The Sisters Vegan, for the heads-up!)