Deep Fried Tofurkey! Aka, vegans can party just as hard as the rest of you bitches! »
Though reluctant to admit it, we vegans eat some nasty shit. Buttery grilled “cheese” with hecka fried soy bacon, Ike’s sandwiches with extra dirty sauce, crispy fried seitan served with Vegenaise for dipping.
Sometimes when nobody’s looking, I buy a 12.5 oz bag of Sweet Chili Lime Doritos at Safeway. Its healthy because we’re vegan, right?
In all seriousness, some omnivores think of our holiday meals as some antithetical version of their own, having “[n]o sausage in [our] stuffing, no butter on [our] corn, and no turkey of any kind.” They also think we don’t have gravy. What. The. Fuck.
I want people to know what delicious, superfluous crap we eat. And I want to take this demonstration to the next level. Today, I deep fried a Tofurkey in a pot of peanut oil. Happy thanksgiving.