Big surprise: meat industry hates Meatless Mondays! »
Due in no small part to Megan Rascal’s marvelous cartoons, Meatless Monday is taking over, and those fuckers with big beef and pork are shitting their ugly, ill-fitting pants. GOOD. I wanna see you sweat, assholes. And look really, really stupid. Fortunately, that is something they do really well, as evidenced by this bit of gold:
The American Meat Institute, a trade group, unsuccessfully urged the Baltimore public schools not to join the Meatless Mondays campaign, arguing that poor kids needed the meat. “For proper nutrition there are a large number of lean cuts that you can eat and it doesn’t take a lot of it,” said Gregg Doud, an economist with the National Cattlemen’s Beef Association.
LOLZ WHAT? That’s the best they’ve got? That’s how their ECONOMIST speaks? I mean, damn. With the addition of food service giant Sodexo to the Meatless Monday campaign, the movement is only going to get bigger and bigger. If the big animal ag wants to stay in the game, maybe they should get into broccoli-farming, or get the fuck out of the way. OK, I know that last bit is wishful thinking as there is STILL meat on the menu on Meatless Mondays and oh, yes, ON EVERY OTHER FREAKING DAY. Anyway, let’s keep this movement moving like a freight train and give these jerks something to really cry about.
Oh, and why you’re at it, pass on Rascal’s adorable-ass Meatless Monday cartoon:
Lax food safety standards make veganism a safer choice »
“Food safety” is totally conceptual, right? Like “equal rights for all humans,” everyone’s all for it in theory, but in practice it just…isn’t.
The forced labor camps in Iowa where all the Salmonella-eggs came from had “pits beneath laying houses where chicken manure was piled four to eight feet high” and “hens that had escaped from laying cages [were] tracking through the manure.” Not to mention the “meat and bone meal” chicken feed tested positive for Salmonella AND was kept in bins full of holes! Want to feel worse? Read all the stories on Chow’s list of the terrible history of the DeCoster farms.
Or, OK, leave off the half-million recalled eggs; maybe they were some kind of huge outlier. An FDA inspector hadn’t seen the inside of one of those chicken-prisons in at least six years, anyway. How’s the meat industry doing? Very poorly, is the answer! They’ve fought every change to every regulation, claiming that they follow all the rules and new ones are unnecessary. Now a super-rare strain of E. coli has appeared in ground beef from Cargill, but the American Meat Institute says that they’re so busy working on preventative measures, which would be blown all to pieces if the Dept. of Agriculture dared to list this new scary E. coli as an illegal substance in ground beef. Even though it has already make people sick, and forced a recall of 8,500 pounds of Cargill ground beef—no no, it’s not THAT bad! Shut up and listen to the nice executives, FDA.
And if you don’t eat meat: how about some honey from China? It’s full of delicious antibiotics! Not that China has time to worry about one company’s scam; it discovered that 402 tons of imported dairy products—99.8 percent of total dairy imports!—were full of Enterobacter sakazakii, plus “excessive amount of nitrites, zinc and total bacterial count.” Wait, E. sakazakii has “historically high case fatality in infants,” up to 80 percent, and the aforementioned “dairy products” were POWDERED MILK FORMULA? That people FEED THEIR INFANTS? Way to go, every country involved in this disgusting scandal, which include Australia, France, New Zealand, Singapore, Taiwan, the U.S., and of course China: you are all reprehensible. [news links via Tom Scocca]
Of course it’s safer—and more humane, but duh—not to eat animal products, but for how much longer? If we don’t change our methods of food production, the world is fucked. The animal-borne bacteria will get into our produce because giant farms aren’t careful with their runoff, and we’ll all perish of some kind of horrible E. coli/Salmonella hybrid. Good luck out there, everyone.