Review: Serrano’s Pizza  »

Hello, let’s talk about California pizza. By which I do not mean, “let’s have an argument about East Coast vs. West Coast or thick vs. thin crust.” That won’t get anyone anywhere, least of all this review underway.

At Serrano’s you will find the only edible pizza outside the Eastern time zone—though according to the logo, at Serrano’s it’s always pizza o’clock!—with plentiful toppings and spicy fresh sauce that they will ladle on extra for no charge. You will not find any vegan cheese, or fancy vegan options, but you will find people who have never once messed up my order, because they listen to their customers when they say things like NO CHEESE. You will also find my favorite cheeseless toppings combination, the “Art & Tom Terrific,” comprising artichoke hearts, fresh garlic, and sliced fresh tomatoes. What? Yes, baked all deliciously on top of a big mound of spicy, fucking zesty marinara sauce and a perfect crust.

A word about “Chicago-style” pizza, or as some might call it, crust aberration. Chicago-style pizza is ridiculous: I don’t want to hear about the merits of Zachary’s or Little Star; they and their double-crust triple-cheese wonderlands are ridiculous. Thank goodness Serrano’s knows what to do with a crust (which is not “make a pizza sandwich out of it”).

Do not mess around with other, inferior pizza delivery places in the area. They will disappoint, and you will be sad, and then you will come back to Vegansauraus and read this review of Serrano’s and it will say “I told you, other places are a mistake!” Serrano’s or switch cuisines! Then you’ll feel even sorrier for yourself, as you chew on the enormous hunk of congealed dough some pizzerias around here try to pass off as “crust.” But truly, the best measure of Serrano’s (Serrano’s’s? Serranos’s’?) success is that their slices cold the next day are as good as they were when you got them hot and fresh. San Francisco, you cannot get better delivery than this pizza.

[photo of pizza that while vegan is not Serrano’s by shil]

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