Clementine Bakery brings fresh-baked vegan yums to Brooklyn »
This weekend I finally made it to Brooklyn’s Clementine Bakery! I went with my pals James (a.k.a. DJ Grand Format) and Jess (a.k.a. Cutie McSweetums). J&J have been telling me about this organic vegan bakery in “Clinton Hill-Stuy” for weeks now so I finally had to check it out for some brunch. Above is one of their cinnamon rolls. It was delicious! Not super-cinnamon-y but it had this great sticky honey flavor. Must be agave? I don’t know, but it was good. And just about the size of my face!
Their tagline is “your neighborhood cake dealer,” which is hilarious, and as you can see, the place is thoroughly adorbs. On top of that, the people were so very nice.
You can see there is an abundance of sweets but they also have a variety of “savory biscuits.” If you don’t know, now you know: I LOVE BISCUITS. They come in wacky flavors and on Sundays, you can get them with gravy! If you don’t know, now you know: I LOVE BISCUITS AND GRAVY. So I got the artichoke-kale biscuit with gravy (pictured below). It came with a lot of gravy. I didn’t need that much but it was tasty. I liked the biscuit but I think I would have preferred a plain biscuit. The flavors are fun if you are just eating the biscuit on its own but with the gravy, the flavors get a bit convoluted. Still super yummy though!
Behind the B+G is my almond milk latte. I absolutely love when you have a choice of non-dairy milks. Soy is just not my favorite but you know that’s usually your only option. Here they have soy, rice, and almond (I think they also had cow milk as an option but maybe I’m imagining things?? But it’s not like I don’t frequent a million other establishments that serve cow milk). Oh, and some of you will be pleased to know that they have a good selection of gluten-free stuff and soy-free stuff. Yay for you guys!
Clementine also has a nice sandwich menu. I didn’t get one (what do you want from me, I had biscuits and gravy AND the giant cinnamon roll, I’m just one rascal!) but James and Jess both got the Schmancy as it is their fave. The Schmancy is composed of seasoned and baked tofu, spinach, tomato, avocado, pesto, and Hollandaise sauce, served on a rosemary roll. Schmancy indeed! James also got this cute heart-shaped cake-sandwich thing to take home.
I should have gotten one too! I was so stuffed, I wasn’t thinking straight. Next time I will be more on my game. I also want to get a danish! They totally had some sort of sweet potato danish that clearly needs to find a home—in my tummy!
So this is definitely a lovely place I can highly recommend. Plus, you never know who you might see! It is apparently where the who’s who of the NYC vegan community meet. We saw none other than Deborah Diamant of SuperVegan and Vegan Drinks fame! And then if Instagram is to be trusted, it looks like Joshua Katcher made it there shortly after I left. And then of course I was there, so that’s obvi a big deal.
In summation: cinnamon rolls as big as my face!
Picnic Bakery! S.F. storefront coming, but you can try their tasty treats already! »
A couple weeks ago we told you about new San Francisco vegan business Picnic Bakery, and we’re back with word on the deliciousness of their delicious treats! And they ARE delicious. Owner Emily was kind enough to drop off a variety for us to try and we were alllllll over it. And by we, I mean me and Meave because seriously, screw everyone else IT’S CAKE. JK jK, you’re all great, but really: CAKE. Also, cupcakes. And pies. And something called PEPPERMINT PANDAS, which are basically as cute and delicious as real-life pandas.
Since I took terrible pictures of everything, I just went ahead and stole some photos from Picnic Bakery’s blog. So, first things first, let’s run down the goodies that we tried, and I’ll go ahead and encourage you to order some stuff ASAP to try for yourself because there was a point at which I was singing “Satellite of Love” to the peanut butter pies. Shine your light on me, you gorgeous chocolate orbs.
First up, the aforementioned PEANUT BUTTER PIE!
What we tried is one of the smaller ones in the background. These things were OFF THE CHAIN. For those of you who are currently in a romantic relationship with the classic combination of peanut butter and chocolate (those of you with beating hearts and taste buds), these things are ridic. Meave says, “Super creamy and fluffy, it was really rich, but also remarkably delicate. Like black tie peanut butter.” BLACK TIE PEANUT BUTTER Y’ALL.
Next! Peppermint Pandas!
They’re basically little chocolate cakes stuffed with peppermint cream and covered in chocolate ganache HOLY JESUS. Meave muses, “The peppermint cream was not too creamy, not too dry, not too minty, not too chocolaty, but clearly and satisfyingly minty-chocolaty.” I love these so much, so so much.
They were IT. If you love chocolate or coconut or happiness, these will rock your socks off. Or get your rocks off. Whichever one of those sayings is sexual, that’s what these will do. Meave liked them (specifically that the cupcake cake was chocolaty, moist, and tender) but she’s not one for coconut so they were not IT for her. More for Laura, come to mama!
Gingerbread tiny cakes!
I didn’t try these because I was on my way out the door to LONDON (that’s right, I was on vacation, sue me!) but Meave polished them off (FRESH!) [Meave note: On the advice of Mama Beck! Who loved them probably as much as she loves Laura!] and said, “a little bite of the best gingerbread you ever had, plus lemony cream cheese frosting HELLO YES. Ginger isn’t my No. 1 jam but these were really good. I think they work particularly well as minis, they’re so flavorful you don’t want to eat a million of them.” And I can say that they were really cute and pretty and the candied orange peel look divine!
Basically, everything was winner winner fuck dinner we’re eating CAKE. If you know anything about anything, you know that I all I want to do is pile into a big bubbly bathtub (a hot tub?) with all of you naked and eat these cakes until we have to get out and take showers and all of a sudden, 18 years later, I’m like, “Remember that night in the big bubbly bathtub with all that cake? Well, here’s your son!” I don’t know what I’m saying but basically, these cakes were so freaking good. They were totally pure junk food, but decadent and very well done. I’m super excited for the store to open in Upper Haight, and until then, I suggest we all hire Picnic Bakery to cater everything forever.
Vegan bakery needs help expanding into the wonderful world of espresso! »
It’s the latest and greatest vegan endeavor to take over the world! Seattle-based vegan bakery Bouteloua Bakery, which reader Bryan tells me makes the best vegan croissants ever, is looking to expand their business to include espresso, in all its glory. But they need our help! Enter IndieGoGo! Bouteloua is trying to raise enough money to buy an espresso machine, among other things, and enough funds to hire some new people! Nice. Besides making the best vegan croissants ever, Bouteloua is also all organic and serves fair trade coffee from The Vashon Island Coffee Roasterie.
I know, some of you are like, “Megan, I don’t live any where near Seattle!” but guess what! I asked the owner (another Megan! Megans unite!) and she said if you go in for the $10 perk or the $50 perk, she will mail chocolate chip cookies to you! You won’t get the free drink on the $50 perk but that should cover shipping. So, you get to help a young vegan business and get some vegan cookies to boot. More importantly, you’re supporting another step in total vegan dominance! Huzzah!
Doughbot brings crazy-flavored vegan doughnuts (donuts?) to Sacramento! »
There’s a new dougnut (donut?) shop in Sacramento. It’s called Doughbot and they have many vegan varieties! Woohoo! They specialize in crazy flavors that people lose their shit for. Like, you know how regular ice cream tastes delicious and everyone is like, “Ice cream, woo!” and then Humphrey Slocombe and Bi-Rite Creamery opened up and started putting shit like old batteries and blood pudding in ice cream and everyone was all, “ICE CREAM GIVE IT TO ME I WILL WAIT IN LINE FOR SEVEN DAYS FOR A SCOOP OF VANILLA ICE CREAM WITH CORN FLAKES AND HOBO URINE IT’S SO PRECIOUS AND UNIQUE.”
Remember that!? Doughbot is bringing the nutso flavors and lucky for us vegans, we can eat lots of them. Since I’m a spoiled American who is tired of stupid old vanilla and chocolate and must have all sorts of shit stuffed into everything I eat, I’ll probably indulge in the bood orange glazed and Mounds of Joy varieties because they sound fucking delicioso. Anyone been? Can you confirm or deny?
Other than that, check out their super cute splash page and logo:
Finally: Tartine has some VEGAN DELICIOUSNESS! »
If you live in San Francisco and think you know anything about food then you are most likely obsessed with Tartine. If you aren’t, congratulations and let’s be friends and eat donuts and drink Folgers and leave this place PLEASE I CAN’T TAKE IT ANYMORE.
Anyway, they’ve got a vegan carrot cake now! Hooray! Now us vegans can wait in line for three days to eat a delicious 10,000-calorie sugar-and-fat-bomb with the rest of you assholes! High five! SO LET’S DISH. Has anyone tried it? Thoughts? I haven’t (photo via awesome reader Shelley!) but my initial feelings go thusly:
1) Excited! Foodie assholes everywhere will have to see a vegan pastry in their butter case!
2) Confused! KAMUT FLOUR? FOR REALLY? Why? The vegan product needs the funky flour, too? Okay, whatever.
3) Excited! I LOVE TO EAT FOOD.
So, there you have it! If you’ve tried it, let us know. If not, I GUESS I’LL TAKE ONE FOR THE TEAM GOD.
Eat this NOW: cupcakes and pie in a jar from Fox & Fawn Bakehouse! »
You gotta eat these cupcakes right now. Fox & Fawn Bakehouse make honestly some of the best cupcakes I’ve ever eaten in my life! I know I say that almost every time I write about anything (best ass-kicking of my life! best lobotomy of my life! best shit sandwich of my life!) but for real, I really really really mean it this time, for real! The cake was spongy and light, and the frosting was sweet but not cloying. Deeeeeelicious. Man, I could eat a few right now and that’s no joke! These are the cupcakes you wish you could make but you just don’t have the skillz to pay the cupcake billz. Speaking of honesty, I honestly have no clue how my fingers haven’t fallen off from all the typing I’ve done in the past month. The fact that I can still walk upright and (kinda) speak English are miracles.
Anyway, you will not regret getting these cupcakes into your mouth, so go ahead and order from them immediately. Oh, and the pie in a jar? RIDICULOUS. It’s a PIE in a JAR and it’s the perfect wedding favor, housewarming gift, present to yourself for making it through the day. Also, Fox and Fawn Bakehouse prices are extremely reasonable! $24 for a dozen is only $2 per cupcake and that’s way less than what you spend in a store. THE DEAL! It is AMAZING! So order a bunch of stuff and fan them on Facebook and generally just eat the shit out of their goodies because even though I got some for free (doesn’t guarantee a good review or even a review period), I’m totally planning on ordering cupcakes from them and PAYING. This is the Real Deal, people, because I don’t like to pay for shit, ask anyone. I mean, ANYONE.
Oh and if you’re not into special ordering things (I don’t know why this would be the case but maybe you’re too poor or don’t think you’re special enough), you can track them down at the Benicia Farmers’ Market, where they’ve been selling out!
Plus, look at this damn logo:
[Cupcake photo by Damien Jay! Thanks, Damien!]
Sticky Fingers’ chocolate-on-vanilla xmas cupcake, with festive sprinkles and edible Christmas tree! We’d like to buy one of these little darlings for every member of Congress who voted yes on Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell abolition and the shark-finning ban. Hate equal rights? Hate sharks? Fuck off, you get no cupcakes from us.
[photo by Mr. T in DC!]
Review: Sweet Freedom Bakery in Philadelphia! »
There’s a new vegan bakery on the U.S. scene! Sweet Freedom recently opened it’s doors in Philadelphia (up the street from the famous Govinda’s!). Fear not, San Franciscans and beyond, they ship! It’s a $40 minimum but you could do it for something special or, you know, a Tuesday.
I went to the bakery with my sister and Fig. I know, they are a thousand times adorable, but he’s spoken for and she’s too young for you! Sweet Freedom is not just vegan, it’s also gluten-free and allergy-friendly (like no peanuts and stuff). It’ll please the lot of us!
I got a chocolate chip banana cupcake with chocolate and vanilla frosting, pictured above. I also got a chocolate cupcake with mocha frosting AND a slice of the cinnamon sugar loaf. You know how I do! The cinnamon sugar loaf was AMAZING. It has a gooey cinnamon sugar layer on top and swirled within. YUM. It’s not beautiful like the cupcake but it was delicious. The chocolate chip banana cupcake was a bit disappointing. It was good—had good flavor—but it was kind of grainy at the end, a bit of a protein bar flavor. Not sure what was going on there. I preferred the mocha cupcake; ooh the frosting! SUPER!
The day I went they didn’t have any donuts, which I had totally been looking forward to. They also didn’t have the pumpkin loaf on their menu but I think that may have been excessive with the cinnamon sugar loaf. JUST KIDDING! I would have gotten both. Ah well! I will just have to rely on cupcakes to get chunky. Le sigh.
The fabulous Shannon from Cinnaholic is up on The Feast showing us all how to make her cinnamon rolls. So cool! Although I’m very lazy and will always buy them and will never ever ever make a batch of cinnamon rolls in my life (I know my limits!), it’s still fun to see how the magic happens. CINNAHOLIC CINNAMON ROLLS, I LOVE YOU!!!
Quick-Ass San Francisco Bay Area Thanksgiving Guide! »
Souley Vegan is doing a special Thanksgiving menu (info is further down the post). I’m hoping for a veganized deep-fried turkey leg. I wanna get Medieval on your asses!
Café Gratitude returns with their FREE VEGAN THANKSGIVING! No matter that it’s raw, it’s free! I mean, you’re already vegan, might as well become a full-on holiday meal weirdo. Oh, and it looks like you might have to work? But, er, FREE FOOD!
If you want to get a meal at a supermarket and bring it home, check out:
Whole Foods varies what it offers store-to-store. Our pals in Los Angeles, quarrygirl, got the Whole Foods dinner last year and looooooved it. Search by store location on their site, or give your closest store a call and find out what they’re offering!
Andronico’s has a pretty rad deal at their eight Bay Area locations! They’re introducing a vegan meal this year and it sounds delicious:
Field Roast: Wild rice, cranberry, fig and grain roast en croûte (1 pound)
Roasted root vegetables (1 pound)
Vegan yukon gold mashed potatoes (1 pound)
Vegan mushroom gravy (½ pint)
Cranberry orange chutney (½ pint)
Vegan pumpkin pie (6 inches)
It’s only $30 for all that awesome food! GET ON IT!
AND NOW: it’s DESSERT TIME! That means PIE!!
You can get vegan options at Mission Pie (order ahead!), Bike Basket Pies (OUR FAVORITES! Best pie in the Bay Area! Order ahead!), or pick one up at Rainbow Grocery or Whole Foods. Also, check out all our our local vegan bakeries and see if they might make you up something special? Bet they will! A cake from Sugar Beat Sweets? Cupcakes from Fat Bottom Bakery? A giant cinnamon roll from Cinnaholic? A toffee treat from Wholesome Bakery? Nabolom Bakery has lots of good vegan options! There are pies and Weekend Ruiner cinnamon rolls from A Fire Inside. Idle Hands Baking Company makes cupcakes and cakes if you aren’t a pie person. Or get a pumpkin pie ice cream cake from Maggie Mudd—that flavor’s coconut milk-based, it’s intense. The options are endless, but you better call now!
Also, if you don’t want others to do the dirty work, you could totally make your own fabulous Thanksgiving, lazy!
Now, let’s get fat, American-style! Happy Thanksgiving!