vegansaurus!

Vegansaurus NYC: Cocoa V!

Hey people, one quick thing: you have to go to Cocoa V before you die! It’s an all-vegan, all-organic, all-fair trade chocolate and wine bar. CHOCOLATE and WINE! What else do you need? That’s pretty much it.

Really it’s not all chocolate and wine, they also have baked goods and a savory menu so I went to Cocoa V for brunch this weekend. I ordered the “daily whimsical quiche,” which was a spinach-onion-Daiya quiche. It was OK. Although I have publicly proclaimed Daiya to be the bomb, I think I’m over it. It has such a distinct Daiya flavor and I’m finally just tired of it. It’s like there’s all these ingredients in the quiche and all I can taste is the Daiya. But the consistency was good and the crust was good—it was a nice little quiche. I was with two friends and we started with the Cocoa V trio which was an edamame pate, hummus, spiced nuts and “toast points” (basically crostini). That’s a picture of the edamame pate on a toast point on stage right over there. This stuff was GOOD. Below is a picture of my friend’s tofu salad wrap she ordered. I tried it, it was kind of bland but good. I guess it’s what you might expect a tofu salad wrap to be like.

After the savory stuff, we got chocolate fondue! You see pals, I’m a baller and I’ll have chocolate fondue for brunch if I damn well please. The fondue wasn’t the best I’ve ever had but it was very good. Then, after the fondue, the REAL fun began! I bought all kinds of chocolates and stuff for people! You see pals, I’m the man. We got to sample this one chocolate I highly recommend you try, it was the spiced chocolate tile with cloves and those holiday spices like that. My friend Kevin said it tasted like Christmas. I liked it because it was salty and I love the chocolate + salt combo. There were so many different chocolates! I got some pretzel clusters for my brother because I’m so sweet and I got a chocolate cat-face on a stick for my friend—again, because I’m so sweet. “Chocolate cat face on a stick” sounds really gross but it’s really cute. It’s just chocolate in the shape of a cat’s head. That still sounds weird but you know what I mean!

We dabbled in the baked goods too; my friend got a red velvet cupcake but hasn’t eaten it yet so I can’t attest to the flavor but I can say it was very pretty. The scone pictured is my chocolate-hazelnut scone I’m going to have for breakfast tomorrow. DON’T WORRY! I already tried it just so I could let you know that it’s super delicious. But the rest, that’s for breakfast, I swear. I didn’t try any of their wine so I’ll have to go back again. Normally, I’m all for morning time boozing but wine in the morning wasn’t appealing today. You may notice there are many pictures in this post but I assure you, this is only a few. It started to pour outside so I was in Cocoa V for about three hours and there were so many pretty things, I got my shutter-bug on.

If you live in New York, you have to go here probably tomorrow. If you visit New York, you really should make a stop here, it’s worth it. If you can’t wait, have no fear! You can order online! Because there is a god! And god wants you to get fat off vegan chocolate! DON’T DISAPPOINT GOD.

Vegan upgrade: St. Francis Fountain!

I know not all of you have the love for St. Francis Fountain. Maybe it’s the hipster staff (and seriously, if that’s such a serious problem for you, you probably need to move elsewhere), or the fact that they’ve always acknowledged vegans without doing much cater to them beyond the obligatory veggie sandwich and tofu scramble (to be fair, a GOOD veggie sandwich and tofu scramble—and tofu subs available in breakfast burritos). Me, I like going out for breakfast, and St. Francis Fountain is my breakfast joint of choice (I like tofu scramble, sue me), so I was SUPER-STOKED to see that they’ve finally, and significantly, upped their vegan game.

First and foremost, they’ve gotten vegan monterey jack cheese. I suspect it’s Follow Your Heart brand, which is fine by me (and you haters can shut up and try it—when it’s broiled in a commercial broiler, it’s pretty great. That pizza you made in your 350-degree oven isn’t a good comparison!). It tastes good and is nicely melted but not liquified, and now it’s in burritos, on burgers, and ON POTATOES. That’s right—St. Francis Fountain now has VEGAN HOME FRIES. If you ask real nice (or order if off the menu), they’ll give you a big pile of them covered with melted vegan cheese, salsa, guacamole, and green onions. It’s pretty much the greatest thing in the entire world (and cheap! A small plate (which I couldn’t finish) was $5.50, the large plate is $7.50), and it’s called the Vegan Thing. DELICIOUS! EAT MANY!

Second, they’ve now got three kinds of vegan pancakes. I’m not a huge pancake girl myself, so my more pancake-savvy buddy sent me a report, saying that the flapjacks are good but lack Earth Balance to go on them (ATTENTION ST. FRANCIS FOUNTAIN—GET SOME EARTH BALANCE. IT ISN’T THAT EXPENSIVE AND WILL MAKE MANY VEGANS’ DAYS). However, even with no Earth Balance (FOR NOW), vegan pancakes are still an awesome find, and it’s nice they’ve bothered to come up with a recipe and make it happen.

Third, they now have something called the Devil Burger, which is a pile ‘o fried seitan with melted vegan cheese on a burger bun with pickles, onions, tomato, and lettuce, with vegan mayo. It’s simple, but it’s FUCKING TASTY and is exactly the kind of greasy vegan diner food San Francisco has been missing. Finally! I also suspect it kills hangovers dead, though I haven’t had an opportunity to test that out yet.

In addition to all that, they have vegan huevos rancheros (now even better with the addition of vegan cheese), vegan breakfast burritos (see above, re: cheese), a vegan burger, vegan chili, several kinds of tofu scrambles (get the one with peanut sauce, mushrooms, and spinach), vegan milkshakes (pricey but rad), and good coffee.

My only complaint is that they did away with their Toasted Vegan sandwich. Sure, a grilled veggie sandwich isn’t the most original thing in the world, but SFF did it up right, and it was a damn fine sandwich. My husband is super-sad to see it go (though also pretty stoked about the devil burger, so, I guess it works out).

Go forth, vegans! Eat of the grease and drink of the coffee! Agitate for the Earth Balance!

Vegansaurus NYC: Curly’s Lunch!

I went to brunch with the omnis this past weekend and we decided to go to Curly’s Lunch in Manhattan. I had never been there but I will be back! It was kind of awesome. It’s just vegetarian but they say they will veganize anything on the menu, “just ask.” How sweet? So sweet! I got the Slumberjack breakfast, vegan style. Vegan pancakes, tofu scramble, Curly’s fries and “sham” (fake ham). First of all, I love the name, “slumberjack” and I’m going to have to work it into my regular parlance. It may be difficult but I ain’t never scared! Second, it was the JAM. So good! I loved the sham and the tofu scramble was especially good as far as tofu scrambles go. The pancakes were excellent but I could have done without the fries. I know it’s their thing but curly fries for breakfast? Kind of ick. The omnis got the Slumberjack too but not veganized so theirs came with eggs and whatnot. They were very pleased—they even ate the veggie bacon! I was so proud.

They had a special that day, vegan gumbo. I loved my pancakes and all but vegan gumbo? Yes please! I will get it next time, if they still have it. Or maybe vegan french toast. Who can say!

Vegansaurus NYC: Square Root Cafe!

Hey people, the unthinkable has happened! I’m completely content! Or at least I was for a brief moment at the adorable Square Root Cafe in Brooklyn. This place is so cute. It’s a diner, but not a ridiculous Johnny Rockets kind of diner, more like a mismatched-wooden-chairs, nice jukebox, lollipops-at-the-counter kind of diner. They don’t have a ton of vegan options but there was definitely a presence. And it said great stuff on the menu like about how all the vegetables are vegan and cooked on-site. That’s really all I ask; I mean, it’d be great if every where had more vegan options but I just really love when the vegan items are clearly marked and you feel really confident about just how vegan they are.

That beautiful monstrosity above is the Bongo Breakfast! And it was AWESOME. For one thing, it turns out I really enjoy saying, “Bongo Breakfast!” For another—look at it! You get all that different food! You can see it’s not your typical tofu scramble—in fact I don’t think the menu called it that. It’s chopped up tofu with mushrooms and bell peppers and it was surprisingly good. It might be a little bland for many of you but I personally enjoy just straight up tofu, so I liked it. I also occasionally eat handfuls of raw oatmeal. Go figure. That crazy-looking sausage was A++ and the hash browns were extra-tasty. I even ate part of the little salad, which is amazing because salads are for nancies.

Guess what else! They offer vegan milkshakes! Pish, like I care. Jk, it’s cool but I just never liked milkshakes. Maybe I should try one though! I’ve definitely never had a vegan milkshake. In fact, one of my assignments for my silly school is to do something I’ve never done that takes me out of my comfort zone; I think it means confronting your inner demons, which in my case are clearly milkshakes. Milkshakes and RATS. Actually, if anyone knows of a place in New York where I can go meet some rats, let me know because I was thinking I could do that for the assignment. Hmm, what was I talking about? Why are you always distracting me!!!

Now, back to the Square Root (I believe that was a math joke. See, I told you I’m basically a mathematician). Not only was the food good, but the guy working there was super-nice and I’m totally not saying that just because he was attractive. Also, he was attractive. Also, this is my new favorite place!

Los Jarritos!

In San Diego there is this phenomenon known as the “Potato Rolled Taco” [Ed. Generally, a “rolled taco” is a taquito if it’s made from a corn tortilla, and a flauta if it’s made from a wheat tortilla]. Jonas is from SD and practically never shuts up about the magicallity of the PRT at Pokez. Having never been to Pokez I can neither confirm nor deny that they are magical but I can say that my boyfriend knows what’s up when it comes to food. He is skinny but he is fierce. In a related note, god bless a skinny person who can throw down when it comes to food. I am bigoted to assume that skinnies can’t bring it when it comes to the dinner table but I’ve been pleasantly surprised by a few in my day. In fact, I know a girl in NYC who is built like a brick house but regularly eats five sandwiches for first dinner. FIRST DINNER. I don’t even want to tell you about second dinner because that shit is not fit for prime time. Needless to say, I curtsy to you, madam.  

ANYWAY, the point is, if Jonas said the PRT is the bomb, it probably is. AND I WANT IT. But also, when the hell am I in San Diego? I’m not Republican, I don’t surf, and I can get all the (LEGAL PRESCRIPTION) drugs I need without hopping over the border so really, there is no need. That’s where Los Jarritos comes in. Los Jarritos is a family-owned sit down Mexican food joint at South Van Ness Avenue and 20th Street in the Mission. You walk in, sit down at a table with menus, order potato flautas and a Jamaica and eat chips and salsa for five minutes until your meal arrives. SOME THINGS YOU SHOULD NOTE:

1) The agua frescas are the size of toddlers. Delicious hibiscus-flavored toddlers. LOOK AT IT NEXT TO THAT CHIP, it’s 50 times its size! Amazing!

2) POTATO ROLLED TACOS ARE THE POTATO ROLLED BOMB. Eat them always. Also, the lovely waitress knew what vegan meant and that just put me at ease. Jonas got the sopes and I can report that they were also the bomb. The veg ones are made with nopales (that’s cactus, gringo) and they are deeeelicious!

3) This place is EL CHEAPO. All you can eat chips, a giant agua fresca, and two HUGE meals set us back 20 bucks! Cha-ching!

Over all, 50 million stars, will be back for more, more, more, more, more I LOVE YOU, LOS JARRITOS.

Vegansaurus NYC: The V Spot

Sometimes I’m weird and I don’t get wordplay right off the bat. What I’m getting at is I went to this restaurant before I got the G-spot pun, FYI. But I’m glad I went because it was muy delish!

You see, I moved to Brooklyn from San Francisco on Saturday, and boy are my arms tired! But seriously folks, I now have to totally reorient myself in a new vegan-friendly city. Turns out, right in Park Slope—my new ‘hood!—there’s a lovely little all-vegan restaurant: The V Spot! So my dear omnivore brother and I decided to go there for brunch.

When we got there it was pretty empty and we were concerned that it sucked, but it was only empty because everyone was sitting on the lovely back patio! The patio was bumping as it was a very nice day. The V Spot specializes in “latin cuisine” (“latin cuisine” makes me think of bacchanals and olive branches, btw) and for brunch they were serving breakfast burritos, huevos rancheros, and other such things. They also had straight-up tofu scramble and even pancakes. My brother got the burrito and I got the tofu scramble with a pancake on the side. They ALSO have an all-you-can-drink mimosa special for $10 during brunch, which of course we got; we would basically be losing money if we didn’t! That’s what I like to call “economics.”

The mimosas were good, duh. My brother loved the breakfast burrito and declared, “I’ll come here ANY time!” Quite a win. I liked the tofu scramble; it was your basic yellow tofu scramble with broccoli, peppers and onions in it. The home fries were decent and the vegan sausage was great. The pancake was excellent! I might have to get them for the main dish next time—you can add blueberries, chocolate chips, bananas, oh my! Then the next time I go, I’ll get the huevos rancheros! Let’s just plan my whole life now! Because I need some direction.

One thing to warn you about: service was SLOW, with a capital GODDAMN. We had to ask for the mimosas twice, my toast twice, my tea twice, etc. It seemed like there was only one waiter for all the tables. It was Easter so maybe they couldn’t get anyone else to work or something. The main dishes came out on their own but for everything else, I suggest you ask twice—that seemed to be the trick to it. I’ll tell you though, it really hinders your all-you-can-drink mimosa experience.

Oh, I almost forgot my favorite part of the restaurant! The sign in the window for when they’re closed says, “Sorry vegans, we’re closed.” And the sign for when they’re open says, “Sorry carnivores, we’re open!” Haaaaaaaaaaaaa. I am a fan of this sign.

Recipe: East Coast coffee cake

I decided to chip in a bit for the most recent SF Vegan Bakesale, and I am a big coffee cake fan so I thought, “Hey! I’ll make a coffee cake! That’s the ticket!” I recently picked up Vegan Brunch by Isa Chandra Moskowitz, and there’s a nice little recipe in there she titles “East Coast Coffee Cake.” What makes it East Coast, you ask? OMG I asked the same thing! Apparently East Coast coffee cake is “a rich, moist, yellow cake topped with a thick messy crumb topping.” OK. I can see that.

My official ruling on this recipe: GODDAMN! It’s good. As I previously stated in the bakesale recap, I had more than one piece before I delivered the cake to the sale. Jeez louise, delish! Way better than that quickity-quick biscuit coffee cake recipe I gave you before. Another nice thing about this one, Moskowitz gives you like 82 variations on the recipe including stuff like chocolate, berries, and figs—oh my! I just did the straight-up O.G. for safety’s sake.

Ingredients
For the topping:
1 cup flour
1/3 cup brown sugar
1 tsp. cinnamon
1/4 tsp. nutmeg
1/4 cup canola oil, plus up to 2 Tbs. more if needed

For the cake:
3/4 cup non-dairy milk (I used almond milk because that’s my new steeze)
1 tsp. apple cider vinegar
1/3 cup sugar
1/2 cup canola oil
1 tsp. vanilla
1 1/4 flour
2 tsp. baking powder
1/2 tsp. salt

For serving:
2 tablespoons powdered sugar (optional)


Instructions
Preheat over to 375F. Grease an 8-inch square pan (Isa says she likes to use a springform pan—interesting). Mix the milk and vinegar together and set aside to curdle.

Make the topping:
Mix together flour, sugar, cinnamon and nutmeg. Drizzle in canola oil by the tablespoonful. Use your fingers to mix until crumbs form. Alternate mixing and adding canola oil until oil is used and large crumbs have formed. Some of the mixture can still be sandy, but make sure you’ve got mostly large crumbs.

Make the cake:
In a large bowl, mix milk mixture, sugar, canola oil and vanilla. Sift (of course I didn’t sift because I’m lazy and sifters are for squares) in flour, baking powder and salt, and mix until smooth.

Pour batter into pan. Evenly sprinkle the topping over the batter and pat down just a bit.

The recipe says bake for 35 to 40 minutes, but honestly (can I be honest?) mine was ready at 30 minutes or even a bit earlier. The cake is done when you can insert a knife into the center and it comes out clean. Let cool for an hour before slicing and serving. Then you can sift the powdered sugar over top after it’s cooled—if you feel like it.

And there you have it! If anyone has made any of the variations, please tell us about it in the comments! OR MAIL CAKE TO MY HOUSE.

[photo by Megan Rascal! Recipe reprinted with permission from Isa!]

Grading the government, loving lemons, saving deer, giving presents to pigs and more in a special holiday link-o-rama!

The Humane Society gives the Obama Administration a B- for animal protection, based on the Change Agenda for Animals the HSUS set at the beginning of 2009. The full report is in this pdf.

Every country is crazy and racist in its own way: in Japan, you can buy a box of tissues shaped like a bucket of KFC “chicken” with Obama styled as Col. Sanders and emblazoned with the English word CHANGE. I don’t know.

Next Saturday, Jan. 9 at Mix (4086 18th St. at Castro Street) from 3 to 7 p.m., Rocket Dog Rescue and Muttville Senior Dog Rescue are cohosting Iris’ Memorial Fundraiser! There’ll be music, art, a raffle, snacks, and drink specials, with all proceeds to benefit Rocket Dog and Muttville.

Our friends at VegNews point us to the super-disturbing news that a “medium-sized” dog eats about 360 pounds of meat per year, which “combined with the land required to generate its food” means that a medium-sized dog has twice the carbon footprint of an SUV driving 6,200 miles per year, “including the energy to build the car.” In short: VEGAN DOGS 4 LYFE. The authors are also heartless advocates of keeping rabbits for company and supper, which obviously we do not support, but COME ON, vegans, are you really feeding your companion animals other animals?

Update: Just like Michael “shut up” Pollan’s “a Hummer-driving vegan has a lighter carbon footprint than a Prius-driving omnivore” (or whatever) comment, the above “facts” regarding the environmental impact of your meat-eating pets have been proven false by actual science. Vegansaurus maintains that giving your companion animals food like V-Dog instead of vile shit even offal connoisseurs wouldn’t touch is better for everyone.

Gracias Madre finally opened and we have a first report. (Should you go? YES you should. duh.)

Arizmendi Bakery, creators of amazing mint-chocolate-chip cookies the size of your face, among other phenomenal vegan baked goods about which Megan Allison has been known to wax rhapsodic, is expanding to the Mission! We are quite pleased.

Oh hey, the recipients of the Ed Block Courage Award were announced just last week Tuesday—NFL players are nominated by and voted on by their teammates—and guess who won for the Philadelphia Eagles? YES! Everyone’s favorite dog-abusing sociopath, Michael Vick! The Ed Block Foundation “celebrate[s] players in the NFL” while “improving the lives of neglected children and ending the cycle of abuse.” I can’t imagine what kind of courage it took to STOP TORTURING AND MURDERING DOGS and START PLAYING FOOTBALL AGAIN, Michael VIck; apparently, enough to reward you for it. A-plus, then. I guess neglected, abused kids have a lot to learn from such an upstanding citizen. Have fun at dinner.

The deer at Valley Forge got a “holiday reprieve,” as the National Park’s plan to have “sharpshooters” kill 1,500 deer over four winters (a November-to-March period), beginning with 500 in 2009, was indefinitely postponed by two lawsuits. The slaughter of these 1,500 deer would destroy 85 percent of the herd presently living in Valley Forge National Park.

LA Weekly says, Meyer lemons and red cabbage are where it’s at. I say, have you ever had German braised red cabbage, all sweet and sour and delicious? It tastes like staying warm on a snowy night, highly recommended.

There’s a new chef at Weird Fish who is reportedly changing the brunch menu and eliminating lunch altogether. Um. Do we have reason to worry, here? The brunch at Weird Fish is great, we fucking love Weird Fish, please do not mess around with our vegan brunch PLEASE PLEASE.

The Guardian has food writers name the most important (for varying reasons) food books of the decade. Fast Food Nation and The Omnivore’s Dilemma get mentions, how broad-minded. Or, you know, shut up, England.

And speaking of publications that irritate me right out of my holiday booze-haze, Bon Appetit lists “the 10 best dishes under $10.” Repping for San Francisco—and the meatless—Harvey Slocombe’s tin roof sundae. Shut up, Bon Appetit.

Northern California Dungeness crab fishing: the season is short, the majority of the dead crabs are canned and shipped out of state, and it has nothing to do with honoring the values of Slow Food goddamn Nation. Color me shocked.

But HEY! here is a video of some pigs getting presents! Aren’t they adorable?