vegansaurus!

Victory Burger opens in Oakland!  »

Victory Burger, the burger joint that Kickstarter built, is open! And it is damn good. DAMN GOOD. Since it’s steps from my front door, I’ve eaten there about 50 times and confirm that everything is extremely legit. Also, I CAN’T FIT INTO MY PANTS DONT LOOK AT ME. As soon as I’m done writing this, it’s off to the Y to exercise (for health! and also because I can’t afford to buy new clothes right now!) but first, let’s drool.

Here’s the menu; you can see the incredible amount of tasty vegan food up on it. Two different types of vegan sandwiches (a curried burger YUM or an arepa filled with marinated tofu, plantains, avocado, and an addictive slaw!), coconut ice cream milkshakes (with add-ins! I’ve had peanut butter-chocolate, chocolate-banana, and strawberry-balsamic!), and tasty-ass deep-fried pickled veggies and fries with AVOCADO MAYO. It’s seriously the best place for your vegan burger and fries fix in town. It’s a classy-ass diner and I’m in love.

Now, some pictures:

WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR?! Victory Burger is on Alcatraz at San Pablo, right next to Actual Cafe, and is open Wednesday through Saturday from 11 a.m. to 3 p.m. Hopefully their hours will expand but they’re a brand-new baby restaurant so give these fools some time, OK?

Restaurant review: Fairfield’s Vegan Paradice is exactly what you want, suburban vegans!  »

Solano County is a million times greater now, thanks to Kimberly and Gerald Brown’s delightful cafe, Vegan Paradice. It’s in downtown Fairfield, which I didn’t know was so adorable. Faithful reader Allison tipped us off to it a couple months ago, but it’s only open Sunday through Thursday, 11 a.m. to 5 p.m., and I have three jobs, so when am I free? But I made it this week for lunch, because I am dedicated to you, suburban vegans. Also it’s hot as all get-out and I wanted soft-serve.

My ma ordered the all veggie sandwich ($6.95), with lettuce, tomato, red onions, olives, sprouts, and tons of avocado, on sprouted whole wheat bread with mayo, ketchup, and housemade cucumber relish and must-have sauce. It was so full the avocado fell out in great green pieces, covered in that tangy sauce.

I got the terrific tofu burger ($7.75), with lettuce, tomato, grilled red onion, and sprouts, with the same ketchup, mayo, and housemade must-have sauce and cucumber relish on a sprouted whole wheat bun. It really was terrific! Gerald compared it to a Wildwood tofu patty; it’s housemade, with diced vegetables (including kale!) and cooked to a crispy outside and a sort of scrambley-textured inside. So good, dripping with sauces and that relish, just tremendous.

We were both pretty full, but because we were there for Vegansaurus, I insisted we order the soft-serve as well. It comes in vanilla, carob, and swirl; obviously we ordered swirl, though I was dubious about the carob.

But I was wrong! It was delicious! They make it with a combination of soy and coconut milks, and it’s sweet and creamy, just as soft-serve should be, with a slightly salty finish that makes the flavor more complex than your standard soft-serve. I think. I haven’t had soft-serve yogurt since 2008, and soft-serve ice cream since 2005. Bless you, vegan geniuses, for bringing us the technical and culinary triumph that is vegan soft-serve. This is a small cup ($3.75), by the way, and it’s huge and we couldn’t finish them.

You can read more about Vegan Paradice in this article in the Fairfield Daily Republic; it’s been open all summer, and they are working on expanding their menu and staff—right now it’s just the Browns. They make a lot of their stuff in-house, including almond roca and caramel for the soft-serve. ALMOND ROCA AND CARAMEL FOR THE SOFT-SERVE.

If you live anywhere near Fairfield, or drive past it on your commute, you have got to stop in at Vegan Paradice. It’s going to be hot through September; come for the soft-serve, stay for the burgers. They have vegan meat-and-cheese combinations we didn’t even try! I’ll definitely be back the next time their hours and my time off coincide. Suburban vegans in Northern California finally have a cafe! Let’s help it flourish.

Seven best Bay Area veggie burgers & Mission Burger’s vegan burger recipe! BURGERS!  »

Obviously I’m trying to optimize SEO for anyone searching for “burger” and when I do things, I go big or go home! So usually I just go home but today: GOOGLE BETTER WATCH ITS BACK.

Anyway! I wrote some stuff up for SFoodie, first being (WHAT I BELIEVE TO BE) the seven best veggie burgers in the Bay Area. Next: a cobbled-together recipe for the dearly departed Mission Vegan Burger. I got the recipe from the nice dudes at Mission Street Food, and then tried to scale it down because that shit was originally for 70 patties and lord knows I can EAT but 70? Touché, Mission Street Food dudes. Touché. Oooh, perhaps we sell them at the next SF Vegan Bakesale?? We just need an industrial deep fryer. You got one? Wanna be my boyfriend?* Please note: if you have one and bring it to the sale, I WILL steal it. OMG, I’ll be deep-frying errrthang in site. You’ll be like, “Laura, where did you go?” and I’ll be all, “Oh sorry, I was just deep-frying my face!” Except I’ll probably be deep-frying a candy bar because ew, health code violation!

Please forgive me, it’s been a rough day. Take us away, picture of the Plant Burger (which may or may be on the list)!
photo from Ed U. on Yelp via SFoodie!

*Sorry, Jonas! I’m sure you understand, you’d do the same to me. It’s either leave or be left, baby!