You can buy these Vegan Bacon Guinness Salted Caramels on Etsy! And before anyone freaks, it’s the vegan type of Guinness! That’s bacon and beer in a caramel. EAT IT, OMNIVORE BITCHES. No, I mean, really, eat it. It’s delicious.
Stuff your face with Nicole’s Fancy Vegan Caramels! »
Imagine this: You’re a stay-at-home mom and a fiction writer, and suddenly you need $30,000 to repair water damage at your house. You could sell your child into slavery, obviously, but Nicole Kornher-Stace of New Paltz, N.Y. came up with a way tastier and more legal option: sell vegan caramels on the interwebs.
Her Etsy store is called Feed Your Face, and did I ever! The budding entrepreneur contacted Vegansaurus to see if we wanted to try her desserts and then tell you about them. Duh, next question. What I didn’t expect was that she’d send along two delicious little nuggets of each of 11 different flavors. Holy fatness, my day was made! And my dentist’s, too!
Nicole started making her caramels for fun, and because her three-year-old will only eat vegan sweets (rock on, kid). All her candies are vegan and gluten-free, and don’t have no corn-syrup neither (she uses coconut milk for the fat). She wraps them in parchment paper, which you can compost, so that’s cool.
Best of all, they’re damn yummy. The texture is on the gooier than chewier side, with some flavors even downright fudgey (though that varies with your room temperature), but the taste is all caramel, all the way. I didn’t love all flavors equally, though, so here’s my own personal, subjective, and totally professional review:
- Pomegranate balsamic: win! Tangy and not at all like a salad.
- Spicy mango: great chewy texture, would be perfect after Indian food.
- Dark chocolate sea salt: way too salty for me. Really salty.
- Dark chocolate orange: pne of the less-chewy ones (kind of crumbly), but the taste—orange oil and deep chocolate—is awesome.
- Green tea chai: Can I have this drink in a coffee shop please? Someone call Starbucks.
- Double ginger: YES YES YES! Kind of like a ginger chew but less intense and sweeter, and like a ginger snap but gooey! (I do love my ginger).
- Spicy chocolate: I think the chocolate is what fudgifies the texture; these have a nice kick without being overwhelming.
- Sea salt: still pretty salty but more edible than the chocolate sea salt ones. If you’re into salt and sweet, you might really dig these.
- Espresso: Coffee flavor’s definitely there but this is less “Pow!” than some of the others.
- Maple: like pancakes and Canada! Nice maple flavor, kind of extra sweet.
- Pumpkin spice: perfect for this time of year! Really nice, like pie. Holy crap, you could make pie with melty caramels on top or something. Score!
In short, if you’re looking for a yummy special fix, I definitely recommend what Nicole’s putting out there.
Nicole also has a section called Cookies For a Cause, where she’ll sell you a PDF of some cookie recipes she’s developed, and 50 percent of profits from that sale go to charity. Cool idea! Even cooler idea: Use her recipe to make cookies for a bakesale (like Sunday’s SF Vegan Bakesale) and then give THOSE profits to charity, too. So much giving!
Final bonus! A photo of Nicole’s vegan-sweets-loving three-year-old petting a turkey at Woodstock Farm Animal Sanctuary. CUTE!
OCD Sweets Caramels: EAT THESE IMMEDIATELY »
I already freaked out about OCD Sweets caramels before I even tried them. That’s just how I roll, I’m enthusiastic. Also: VEGAN CARAMELS. They’re few and far between, so when a new product enters the market, my body starts to simulate what I can only assume is a stroke. My heart starts to race, I break out in a cold sweat, and I get a little shaky. Imagine two really attractive people started making out in front of you (feel free to use the mental image of me and Gael García Bernal. Or me and me)—you know that kind of flustered excitement? That’s me when I hear about vegan caramels. I wish that were a joke or an exaggeration but I yam what I yam. And what I yam is a fat-ass vegan with hard-on for caramel.
I finally tried them. Holy. Shit. SOFUCKINGOOD*!&&^*&^*!^%@&^!%!!!!! I got my hot little hands on a massive quantity of the good stuff* and I was honestly blown away. These caramels are unlike anything I’ve ever tried. Sweet, smooth, creamy, and divine, with flavor combos that sound insane and taste amazing! I loved everything I tried, but I’d have to say my favorites were:
1) The Hoppy Vegan. It has BEER and PRETZELS in it and it’s SO G-D GOOD. I could just eat these and nothing else for days. Sure, I’d be urinating shit and crapping piss, but it’d be worth it. Annnnnnd, I’m really really sorry, I have no clue why I’m so gross today. I think I’m PMS-ing. CHOCOLATE! SHOPPING! ACK!
2. The Vegan Rosalia. Tangerine, dark chocolate, and roses. Seriously. It’s insane. I’d eat these until all my teeth fell out and had to be replaced. WITH SHARK’S TEETH.**
3. VEGAN BOOTY. It’s vegan toffee, y’all! From the site (which is adorable and the descriptions are so clever and perfect): “coconut butter toffee with toasted coconut inside, outside and all around, dark chocolate and shiver me timbers peel from a fresh picked orange.” UGH SO G-D GOOD.
Those are just a few of my favorites. Honestly, it’s hard to pick, so go with whatever sounds interesting to you. You won’t be disappointed!
Not only that, OCD SWEETS RECENTLY WENT ENTIRELY VEGAN! Yes, all of their products are totally vegan, and totally amazing. We need to buy up all their products to show them how much vegans appreciate their radness and their deliciousness. I just…I could not love them more. I love them so much that I’m thinking of driving to Other Avenues in the sleet and hail to get a fix. That’s saying something for me, as I don’t like to the leave the house if there’s even a slight inconvenience. This is me: “It’s 75 degrees out? Isn’t that a little hot to leave the house? I’m not Jamaican!” Or, “It’s 68 degrees out? Isn’t that a little cold to leave the house? I’m not Alaskan!” Or, “These pants are too heavy to lift, I don’t think I can leave the house today.” I’ve got a million of those! My skin is becoming see-through due to lack of sun and I’m pretty sure I’ve forgotten how to walk. Psych! I can walk to the fridge!
The point is, I don’t do much, and I’d do a lot for those caramels. If you can, go get ‘em at Other Avenues (and check their Facebook page for hopefully updated locations! or just fan them because they’re rad!). Or if you can’t get there (I feel you), go order ‘em and have a giant batch of delicious vegan caramel goodness delivered to your face. They might seem expensive, and that’s because they are, but you get a huge amount for the price. Enough caramel to serve as multiple desserts, and I can EAT. I just can’t say enough good about this company, the fantastic woman behind it, the delicious product, and yeah, it’s the best. Get up on this!
*One of the few perks of being a blogger. That, and a fat ass. And a gnawing sense of regret about the things you should be doing with your life. Also, carpal tunnel.
**Natural death, of course. Hopefully while battling a giant squid and a T. rex.
Delicious OCD caramels for a cause! »
Obsessive Confection Disorder (OCD! Adorable!) makes amazing vegan caramels (which we discovered via SFoodie last month!) and we love them. We extra love them their special “compassionate caramels,” which are infused with fresh lavender and sprinkled with lavender dust. They’re so fancy and so delicious, and they’ve got a heart of (caramel) gold.
The compassionate caramels were created to honor a close friend of Melodi, the genius behind OCD. Her friend recently lost her battle with breast cancer and Melodi wanted to do something to honor her memory. So, she’s selling the “compassionate caramels,” with every cent raised going to the Napa Valley Hospice & Adult Day Services. They’re $5 for “two honkin’ ounces” and every bite is fucking amazing. Seriously, I will give these caramels an official review but trust, RIDICULOUS. Let’s gorge! The caramels are available for pick-up in central locations in Napa or SF, or she can ship directly to your mouth. For more info, contact Melodi!
Do good while getting fat, what could be better? Don’t answer that!
[Please excuse this crazy post, I wanted to get it up because I think it’s really important and awesome, but I am currently doing 90 other things and so AHH, everything is crazy! Especially me! NOW ORDER CARAMELS! Oh, and make sure to specify that you want the vegan ones!!]