vegansaurus!

04/17/2012

Today Abby Bean tipped us to the story of a rooster who spends his days outside Gus’s Fried Chicken restaurant in Collierville, Tenn. Everyone thinks it’s so funny! “He runs this place!” exclaims the titular Gus. People have called the local Animal Care and Control out of concern that the rooster will be hit by a car. He’s like their mascot!

Why do patrons of a fried chicken restaurant love to see a live, (relatively) free rooster outside of the place where they go to devour this rooster’s fellow birds? The fine people at Suicide Food (RIP) know: When the animal you’re about to eat seems to approve, and even encourage (this rooster “greets” patrons, remember) your consumption of it, you no longer have to feel guilty about causing a living being to suffer and die for your meal.

No matter what his true intentions, this rooster has become a chicken ambassador; his presence tells people, “I’m a chicken, and if I haven’t yet burned this place that cooks my dead fellows to the goddamn ground, then it must be acceptable in my moral universe. Fried chicken for all!”

I wonder how long until someone tries to feed the rooster a piece of chicken.

02/07/2012

It’s a CHICKEN sitting on a DOG, via COK. I give up! The internet wins! I feel like the only way things could get cuter is if they were sitting on top of an elephant and if THAT happened, I honestly would kill myself because that’s IT. That is IT.

It’s a CHICKEN sitting on a DOG, via COK. I give up! The internet wins! I feel like the only way things could get cuter is if they were sitting on top of an elephant and if THAT happened, I honestly would kill myself because that’s IT. That is IT.

02/03/2012

Top 10 links of the week!: A hokey pokey through the roller rink of veganism!  »

A new video from Kizz and Cazz. They want to make you vegan. 

From our pal Tom Philpott, 80% of Chicken Growers Never Sanitize Poop-Filled Cages. And as we scary factory farm video watchers know, they aren’t just poop-filled, they are filled with hella dead chickens left to rot. That’s got to be good for you.

From Discovery, a baby pygmy elephant is rescued! WHY DIDN’T YOU TELL ME THERE ARE PYGMY ELEPHANTS? That means there’s probably one that will fit in my purse. They’re actually super endangered though so don’t go putting them in purses, guys.

Over at One Green Planet, they have an interview with skateboard baller Ed Templeton. He’s been a vegan since 1990 and my how things have changed!

After bad press over their egg farming practices, a bunch of monks in South Carolina are growing mushrooms! Totes more godly. 

The U.N. says that world food demands are going to outpace supply in the next few decades. Hmm, what to do? Maybe listen to the U.N.’s recommendation to reduce meat and dairy consumption? Of course there’s no mention of that in the first link. That would just be silly. 

So are you following Grist’s Protein Angst series? We talked about how bad the soy one was last week but there seem to be some good ones too. Like this Protein Propaganda one. We should probably read them all. Which do you like? I’ll prioritize. I’m like a machine. 

More vegan goodness from The Atlantic.

I’m hesitant to share this but it could be something really good for orcas! Some ex-Seaworld people made a site and it sounds good, it’s just that it has a countdown to Burning Man on it. I just can’t look at a site with a countdown to Burning Man on it. 

Did you hear about this nutty Nigella Lawson and Gillian McKeith thing? Awful! Choosing Raw has a great response

Finally, awkward cat sleeping positions on Buzz Feed! (via VegNews)

01/11/2012

Chickens are the 95 percent!  »

Jan. 5 was National Bird Day, for which the Food Empowerment Project posted an amazing piece on chickens, who are the vast majority of animals used for food.

It starts:

When discussing what to post on Facebook for National Bird Day on January 5, my partner and I agreed that although ducks and turkeys should be recognized, we should talk about chickens raised for meat. Why? Because of the 10 billion land animals killed for food in the U.S. each year, more than 9 billion of them are chickens. In fact, my partner said, they are the 95 percent, and that’s when the image you see was born.

Damn, that is sad. You hear so much about people giving up eating red meat for their health and you have to think, the chickens are still suffering. Now, this is a totally unresearched idea that I’m pulling straight out of my butt, but the amount of people I know who “just” eat chickens and/or fish often order the chicken and/or fish dishes when we’re out. It’s not like they get to tofu stir-fry, you know? If you eat that way, you’re not really helping animals; you’re just eating more dead chickens and fish.

Maybe giving up eating a few kinds of animals is part of your path to quitting altogether — and that’s rad! If it is, I’d think about that information up there, finish reading the Food Empowerment Project piece, and then ponder how awesome and special chickens are. Because they are SO RAD. Look how cute they are in sweaters! And how interesting and inquisitive they are, and how much they love dust baths! Then! Maybe just stop eating all the animals? There are SO MANY good vegan meats, especially ones that TASTE JUST LIKE CHICKEN—so really, there’s no reason to eat all that gross ol’ animal flesh. Do it, Rockapella!

Finally, this Mark Bittman piece about how American meat consumption is down is really hopeful. I wonder if that matches up with meat production at all? Or if the government is just buying off the excess and chucking it? Or you know, putting it into school lunches. So smart, our government! And it runs so well! Signed, SIR GRUMPS A LOT.

05/02/2011

Gross meat germs cost us billions in healthcare dollars annually!  »

I get a lot of questions about being vegan:

Q. Do you actually like tofu?
A: YES.

Q. Don’t you miss steak?
A: NO.

Q. How did you get to be so beautiful?
A: I’ll never tell.

One of the most irritating questions is, “Isn’t veganism crazy expensive?” and I’m all, “How much did that carton of free-range eggs cost you?” Now science can back me up: Some study ranked pathogens found in food according to how much they cost society, and more than half, including the top three, are found in meat products.

Guess what was at the very tip-top? A food contaminant called Campylobacter, which is found in the nastiest of factory-farmed products: chicken! Campy, as it shall be affectionately known henceforth, sickens 600,000 people and costs society $1.3 billion per year in terms of medical care, missed work, chronic health problems, and even death. DEATH, Y’ALL. Could this all be fixed, as the article suggests, by overhauling the USDA? Probably not—they be in the pockets of the meat and dairy industry, yo!

In conclusion, while veganism might sometimes cost me slightly more money right off the bat (assuming I choose to eat exclusively processed faux meat products) than eating burgers and chili dogs, it saves me AND society money in the long run!

04/23/2010

Killing whales, saving sharks, chickens chickens chickens and MORE in this week’s link-o-rama  »

Hello best friends! This deer comes to visit this cat every morning to cuddle and play! UGH interspecies love is the sweetest best. [Thanks to reader Dolly for the photo!]

Vegan-type events!
Don’t forget about the vegan bakesale for bone marrow tomorrow! It’s scheduled from 1 to 4 p.m. in Dolores Park; go be a good person and buy something. You’ll be outdoors anyway, the weather’s fantastic.

Do you have cable? If so, you should watch the Humane Society’s Genesis Awards this weekend! They’ll air on Animal Planet twice: tomorrow, Saturday Apr. 24 at noon, and on Sunday Apr. 25 at 1 p.m. (PDT).

Harvest Home Sanctuary will host its very first Poultry Boot Camp to teach you all about “poultry health, nutrition, and rescue opportunities.” The event happens at the Sanctuary on Saturday, May 8 from 1 to 4 p.m. and costs $25, which includes materials, snacks, and a tour. RSVP by May 1.

Let’s freak out!!! Jeremy Fox is doing a week of vegetarian—and vegan-friendly—tasting menus at some nasty meat-tastic restaurant called Animal in Los Angeles next month, VEGANSAURUS ROAD TRIP!!! The dates are May 17 through 23, and it’ll cost $70 per person to eat, but holy mother how can it possibly not be worth it?

Miscellaneous items of varying importance!
Everyone’s going nuts for Social Kitchen and Brewery—Eater SF has a tour and a menu preview, and Beer & Nosh has an interview with Brewmaster Rich Higgins. As you know, the menu should be composed of 1/3 vegan and 1/3 vegetarian items, and our Sunset correspondent Megan Allison will be on the scene as frequently as possible with the report.

Don’t like beer? Drink some tequila! Now you can get super-fantastic, super-fancy, super-local tequila, WOO and another WOO because tequila on a gorgeous spring day in the Bay Area are two of my favorite things possibly ever. And no I am not going to flash you, jerk.

Instead let’s serve a delicious vegan supper, with these recipes from the Kitchn! I swear they are doing these articles just to get on our good side. Whatever their nefarious plan is, it’s working, because here is another link, hello.

Despite agreements with food banks and the Good Samaritan Food Donation Act of 1996, supermarkets still waste literal tons of perishable food.

Let’s go to the farmers market instead! Apparently there are super-awesome ones not only in our beloved San Francisco, but in Madison, Wisc.; Little Rock, Ark.; Lincoln, Neb.; and Des Moines, Iowa. Who knew—outside of the residents of those cities, obviously?

The always-genius Bay Area Bites presents a totally relevant, not-at-all obvious list of ways to “green” our kitchens.

The International Whaling Commission is all, Hey Japan, let’s not kill so many whales! And Japan is all, OK we’ll kill fewer whales but we’re not going to stop killing the endangered species, so fuck off!

Hawaii state Senator Clayton Hee, however, will not see this same bullshit happen with sharks: he is working to make possession of shark fins a misdemeanor in Hawaii.

Guys, guys, get this: the civet is a smallish mammal who lives in Indonesia, eats coffee berries, and poops out the beans that have been fermented through its digestive system and will make reportedly the tastiest—or at least, the priciest—coffee, like, ever. So instead of following civets around and picking up their droppings to find the beans, people are—you’ll never guess—catching them, caging them, and feeding them beans! God, isn’t capitalism the fucking best?

Homeless dogs in Moscow keep warm by sleeping on the subway, just like homeless people. Please pass the tissues, I am going to cry my damn eyes out. And no I don’t know why English Russia tagged this article as “Funny.” [photo from English Russia]

And while we’re sobbing, maybe it’s time to look at this World Press Photo 2010 Award-winning photo series by Tommaso Ausili called “The Slaughterhouse,” which for the sensitive among us (read: me) could be too much to actually really look at. But you are brave and bold, do please check them out.

Things that make dudes gay: soy; hormones in chicken. But what if you can buy KFC to find the cure for breast cancer! Even the Double fucking Down, you guys! Fifty entire cents from every pink bucket of “chicken” parts sold will go to the Susan G. Komen Foundation. Oh no, but fried chicken and fish increases your cancer risk, just like eating meat from basically any mammal at all? Well, shit.

Hilariously, a beef-industry-funded survey “of American beef eaters” found that cattle ranchers and farmers have “the third greenest profession” in the U.S.! Of course they’re environmentalists—they commute to work on horses! Har har har.

Significantly less disgusting, and in fact quite wonderful: Healthy Happy Life’s slideshow of amazing vegan desserts in New York City.

The geniuses at the Idaho Department of Fish and Game have decided that migratory pelicans are ruining everything—i.e., eating all the native and artificially stocked trout that people want to fish—and because the Feds won’t allow them to shoot the birds, they are going to release non-native badgers and skunks into the area to deal with the problem “naturally.” Not everyone agrees that it’s the pelicans causing the decline in the trout population, and letting non-native species out into the wild hasn’t always (ever?) gone well in the past, but fuck it, people want to fish for their motherfucking trout.

Whoops, pescatarians! Watch out for that ahi tuna from Hawaii, it’s full of salmonella! Better stick to a delicious lion and antelope burger from Sacramento. God knows what kind of “lion” it is or how the proprietors can say it’s from the U.S., but hey, this “article” is 50 percent cut-and-pasted quotes from Facebook, so who knows anything? And anyway exotic is the new cute-n-cuddly, right? 

Because we’re Vegansaurus, we’re obviously not down with congressional hopeful Sue “crazypants” Lowden’s idea to barter chickens for healthcare. If we weren’t capitalists—do note the subjunctive case there—we might be into the idea of trading vegetables, or vegan suppers, for something like ophthalmologic care (someone needs a new pair of glasses) (hint: me!) or a motherboard for a MacBook. Steve Jobs, the Apple cafeteria cannot serve all your gustatory needs, I know it. Regardless, we do like the disco remix of Crazypants Lowden’s proposal, mostly because of the happy (?) dancing chicken. [if you can’t see the video, click through to vegansaurus.com!]

03/15/2010

I heard they eat women  »

I know new words are fun, but you can’t just go around inventing them willy-nilly! “Cybersex”: very important word development; “femivore”: SOME BULLSHIT.

The New York Times offers up this new concoction as a combination of locavorism and modern housewifery and/or feminism. The writer, Peggy Orenstein from our very own Berkeley, Calif., has a few friends who grow their own food and now are all buying chickens. Then BAM! Femivores! No, it’s actually not people who eat women. It’s women who are stay-at-home moms and make all their own stuff like clothes and now I guess eggs.

To be honest, I think I’m missing a few steps. You can read for yourself and see. Or maybe it’s just that the whole literary aesthetic is too distracting because it makes me want to vom. Who can say. Check it out:

"All of these gals—these chicks with chicks—are stay-at-home moms, highly educated women who left the work force to care for kith and kin. I don’t think that’s a coincidence: the omnivore’s dilemma has provided an unexpected out from the feminist predicament, a way for women to embrace homemaking without becoming Betty Draper. ‘Prior to this, I felt like my choices were either to break the glass ceiling or to accept the gilded cage,’ says Shannon Hayes, a grass-fed-livestock farmer in upstate New York."

Glass ceiling or gilded cage? I know that’s a quote, but bleeeeeh! I need a shower! And what about men who grow their own food? Or women who grow their own food and have a job outside the home? Or what about words that already exist and aren’t ridiculous? I also doubt that this is anything new. Isn’t this just kind of a farmer? What makes them femivores? That they have chickens or that they are middle class?

01/08/2010

Weekend events, miracle stories, bacon-hate, breast injections, a passel of crazies and more in this week’s massive post-holiday link-o-rama!!!  »

Opening tonight at the Roxie: Mine, a documentary about New Orleans residents searching for their lost pets after Hurricane Katrina. Tickets are still available for tonight’s shows at 7 and 9, and it plays through Thursday, Jan. 14. The Roxie is at 3117 16th St., between Valencia and Guerrero Streets.

The long-awaited first-ever East Bay Vegan Bakesale is happening tomorrow, Saturday Jan. 9 from 11 a.m. to 4 p.m. at Issues, at 20 Glen Ave. at Piedmont Avenue in Oakland!! This will be super-exciting, don’t be a jerk and miss out!!

After Saturday’s bakesale, head over to the Rocket Dog Rescue and Muttville fundraiser beer bust at Mix Bar, at 4086 18th St. at Castro Street. There’ll be snacks, entertainment, and a raffle; the fun is scheduled for 3 to 7 p.m.

On Sunday, Jan. 10 from 3 to 7 p.m. is the Food Not Bombs Vegan Chili Showdown! It’s at 3030B 16th St. at Mission Street, across from the 16th Street BART station. The entry fee is $7, and FNB will provide music and cornbread. MUSIC AND CORNBREAD ALL RIGHT.

In other weekend happenings, SFist reports that Mission Minis opens today. They have vegan options and it’s but two blocks from Vegansaurus HQ. You do the math.

Have you heard of Green Coriander? It’s a new take-out-only Indian place in San Francisco that’s offering a 20 percent discount to anyone who mentions they read about it on Mission Mission (you could say you were directed to them through MM via Vegansaurus, too, if you wanted). This week’s menu is nearly all vegan, too!

The Kitchn lists its top 25 meatless recipes from 2009, 19 of which are vegan!

A (borrrrrrring) Q & A with Food, Inc. director Robert Kenner, in which he says he is “not setting out to be a vegetarian,” which, duh and shut up, although he does say something about “chang[ing] the argument” of a libertarian, so that’s not so bad.

And then the LA Times comes back with a sound op-ed on food and farming, and not yelling so much about all of it because civility.

YES YES YES times 1 billion: the first page of the first chapter of Nicolette Hahn Niman’s new book, Righteous Porkchop: Finding a Life and Good Food Beyond Factory Farms is available online now!!! Hypocrisy has a new handbook, AWESOME!

Even Foster Farms is grossed out by the “water, salt, lemon juice solids, natural lemon flavor, cane juice, corn syrup and other natural flavorings” injected into chickens post-slaughter to make them more appetizing to consumers.

Did you catch the Bob Barker interview about the Sea Shepherd on Rachel Maddow’s show on Tuesday night? It was great, as is nearly everything to do with the great Bob Barker.

Marion Nestle predicts that the meat industry will “push back hard” this year after the beatings it took in 2009. As do we!

Finally, Grub Street proves that we are not the only ones totally grossed out by bacon on goddamn everything.

Vegan feminist hero Jill at I Blame the Patriarchy alerts us to the repulsive practices of the Bravo Meat Packing slaughterhouse in New Jersey.

It’s an epiphany miracle: a frozen kitty comes back to life!

"This guy is really afraid of cats and his friend is trying to help him with his fears! That is so helpful and nice." We really, really love The Awl.

We really, really do not love crazy people who get their cats tattooed. Also, who the fuck tattooed the cat? All of you are insane assholes.

FREE STUFF: Say the secret word—as of press time, it’s “twitter”—at Gracias Madre and get a free Eel River IPA. Tip via SFoodie.

Francis Lam rebuts that ultra-obnoxious “plants have feelings, so get off your high (figurative) horses, vegetarians” New York Times op-ed; unfortunately, he ends with precious little “just say grace for everything you’re eating” attempt to absolve the eater of culpability for everything on his/her plate, including animal products, and in doing so resolves nothing. Nice going, smarty.

The Huffington Post thinks it’s clever: a fake meat slideshow! Look, without Tofurky deli slices, Soyrizo, or shrimp crafted from root vegetables, it is incomplete to me.

What’s going on with soybean cultivation? Oh, only that growing so much of it to feed all those animals you omnivores eat is the main contributor to the destruction of South American rainforest. No big.

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