A team of Spanish and Moroccan scientists analyzed 20 samples of cow’s milk using the most highly sensitive test of its kind, and discovered they contained 20 different painkillers, antibiotics and growth hormones. WTF?! You heard right: The results, which were published in the Journal of Agricultural and Food Chemistry, showed that cow’s milk contained traces of anti-inflammatory drugs commonly used as painkillers in animals and humans. Check the totally terrifying graphic below:
Dr. Evaristo Ballesteros of the University of Jaen in Spain, who led the study, told the Daily Mail that “We believe this new technique will help provide a more effective way of determining the presence of these kinds of contaminants in milk or other products.” Using the same tests, Ballesteros and his team also found traces of painkillers ibuprofen and naproxen, hormones, and the antibiotic triclosan present in human breast milk. If these findings are true in Spanish and Morrocan milks—human and animal alike—they are likely true for milk produced in the USA and all over the world.

Scary stuff, kids—get off the udder!

[infographic via the Daily Mail]


Asparagus: the new gateway drug  »

in England have invented a dish called Colombian Asparagus. You snort it; the powder smells just like cooked asparagus, which makes sense because it’s made of cooked asparagus (plus some other secret magical stuff).  It costs $2,240 an ounce (or £50 GB a gram[me]—that took some MATH, people). I want my money back if it doesn’t make my pee smell funny.

This new dish has some obvious problems, primarily that it’s stupid. Why would I want to snort my food? That’s not going to get me full at all.

British anti-drug advocates are freaking out about the “message” this stupid food-product for the wealthy sends. Lucy Dawe of Cannabis Skunk Sense (WTF’s up with that name? I’m not even touching that) tells the Daily Mail

'Personally, I think it's very irresponsible. People might think it's a huge joke but to me it's a very dangerous precedent to set.

'It's extremely provocative, I can see no reason to turn this into something you can sniff—I'm sure there's lots of other ways they could have turned it into something you can eat.*

'It does risk bring more and more people into contact with drugs, a world where there's nothing but misery waiting for them.'”

Um, seriously? I snorted Pixy Stix back when I was 12 and all I learned was that it hurts to get stuff up your nose; I never moved on to snorting actually intoxicating substances. Does this person think popping Advil is a gateway to ecstasy—same delivery method!

I think you should do what you want with your own money and asparagus. I guess that makes me an asparagus-libertarian. Asparatarian! This isn’t even the worst use of asparagus I’ve ever seen; that prize goes to the Asparagus Juice I tried in Taiwan back in 2006:


I recommend roasting your asparagus at about 450 F until the smoke alarm goes off/it’s tasty and crispy, then drizzling it with a little balsamic vinegar. That’s how it’s done in America, biatches.

*Like by just EATING it? It started as a food, lady.

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