vegansaurus!

Taste Test! What’s the Best Vegan Turkey Substitute?  »

This photo is from the WaPo.

You know what I’m pissed about? That no one invited ME to participate in this taste test the Washington Post ran, comparing six un-turkey alternatives you could be having at your table this week, or whenever else you feel the need for turkey alternatives.

Spoiler alert: Tofurky and Field Roast won. By a lot. They’re my favs, especially Field Roast products, so I’m not surprised.

What I am surprised about: There are six vegan turkey alternatives?! A major daily newspaper is covering this?! Their write-up is nuanced enough to explain why people might say no to dead flesh on the table (health, environment, animal rights) AND to point out that fake turkey has some issues of its own (highly processed, weird ingredients, questionable environmental impact)?! 

I’ve never served one of these guys before— last year I stuffed pumpkins with polenta and seitan bourgignon, the year before I made cholent from Veganomicon and a lentil stew, stay tuned for this year’s plans… But I’ve eaten them and I get the appeal. I’m glad they exist. And I’m glad the mainstream world is paying attention to them. 

Things are changing. Slowly. Yay! Something to be thankful for!

Ok here are the results (you can see them bigger here):

Agree? Disagree? Tell us below!

Lunch in Oakland is getting sexier, or at least more vegan  »

If you’re around Lake Merritt and hard up for a sandwich, Merritt Station Cafe has got your back. Situated too close to a Gold’s Gym for my liking, it’s still a pleasant place to sit down to a large $4.99 Tofurkey sandwich with all the fixings! Check out this mega-sandwich that I had for mega-cheap! Also, the guys who made it were super nice! Also, I got to stare at people in Gold’s going up on down on ellipticals, and try not to think about sex. VERY ATHLETIC AND AWKWARD SEX.

Secondly: Have you been to Brown Couch Cafe (340 14th St. at Harrison) yet? It’s right around that area with Golden Lotus (it’s a Golden Era! in Oakland!) and No Worries and Rico’s Diner and Breakroom! Man, Oakland, with all your stealthy vegan food everywhere! Anyway, Brown Couch has several vegan menu items, and most others can be made vegan if you just ask. Definitely try the ridiculously tasty vegan chicken salad, which you can have in a wrap or on top of a salad. It’s ridonk. Also, the smoothies are fresh and tasty! The service is very friendly, and overall, it’s a fantastic lunch option and another excellent alternative in the area—all these delicious places make me want to get a business-lady job in downtown Oakland (LIES).

[Thanks to Kristy and Megan for bringing these fine establishments to our attention!]

Guest post: Vegansaurus NYC: Red Bamboo is delicious!  »

Go to Red Bamboo. GO NOW!

This is what it looks like.

I’m pretty sure those two people aren’t always there so don’t consider them a landmark.

I have been fairly interested in having a big meal at this establishment ever since I’d first heard the buzz. One of my louder vegan pals had raved about one of their burgers declaring it the NYC faux-meat mecca; I raised my eyebrow.

I invited my friend, Michael, he’s a lovely vegan and also a lovely person, and we had  great time. The ambiance is pleasant and the service was excellent. Please note that I work in the restaurant business and I don’t just throw around the word “excellent” when it comes to waiter skills. I got standards! And I thought the food was super good.

They have an extensive menu with a TON of options on it. However, it is a vegetarian place, not a vegan place, but all the vegan food items are clearly marked. Yay for convenience. Boo for not being 100 percent vegan.

To be clear. This Red Bamboo food is not healthy food. It is not for the ultra-health-conscious. Do not go to Red Bamboo if you are in the mood for a salad. I know many folks like to keep their grub on the “whole food” side, and I would not recommend a Red Bamboo outing for you folks. It is for junk food lovers!

We had buffalo wings for an appetizer. (sorry, no photo, I was busy EATING) Then we had 2 entrees. Michael is nice so we shared a little.

I had the cashew “chicken.”

Yum city! Seriously some of the best “chicken” I’ve had in my young vegan life. My mouth is totally watering looking at this pic.

Michael had a dish whose name I can’t remember. I think it was Dante’s Cuisine? I scanned the online menu and that was the only thing that sounded familiar. Whatevs. It was good.

I’m way too hungry to be writing this right now.

I say yay Red Bamboo. Deliciousness! Not too expensive either and huge portions; I took some home and ate it for lunch the next day.

We also had a peanut butter chocolate something cake? It was awesome. I LIKE EATING! I especially liked eating at Red Bamboo and will definitely go again. Yum yum. Apparently they had another location in Brooklyn and it used to be yummier but they revamped it and serve dead things now? Two thoughts on this: 1) TOTAL HATE; 2) The West Village one is plenty yummy. Still eat there. Don’t let that Brooklyn incident keep you away from the drumsticks. You’re worth it.

Laura Yasinitsky is a writer, comic, waitress, and animal-lover based in New York City. She has appeared on Comedy Central’s Open-Mic Fight and writes for US Weekly’s Fashion Police. You can follow her silliness on Twitter @LaraYaz and read about her animal friendly adventures here.

Vegan travels: eating Mexican food in the South Caucasus!  »

I’ve been living in the Kakheti region of (the country of) Georgia since late February of this year, and though there’s plenty to eat, it’s rarely “foreign” and it’s never explicitly vegan. Well, once I walked by a gelato place in Tbilisi whose sign said (in English) “Coming soon, vegan ice cream!” but that was in March and I haven’t been able to check it out since.

Some of my friends had spoken of a Mexican restaurant in Sighnaghi (სიღნაღი)* called Pancho Villa, saying that not only was it good, it had vegetarian options, as in “fake meat in your burrito” vegetarian options, so of course I had to go. For Vegansaurus, and for myself.

Sighnaghi is the City of Love, for reasons unexplained by the country of Georgia. It is also really small and cute and on a bunch of hills with terrible cobblestone-esque streets that trip you like they were designed to cause maximum ankle damage.

I was not feeling much like beans when we went, so I ordered the “fajitas,” and also a margarita despite its being super-expensive because you know who loves tequila? ME.

Here, “fajitas.”

It came with a basket of fresh warm tortillas! And tasted a little bit like really Americanized Chinese food! Which was weird! Like, there was no cumin or chili powder or anything in the spice mix, mostly a lot of hot pepper flakes, and the nationally mandated gallon of oil. But you know what? Still good. I wanted it to be better, but after four months without a single soy product, it made me happy.

The restaurant is pretty adorable, too; painted up all “Mexican” with blankets and sombreros and (prints of) photos of Pancho Villa on the walls. The view was typically spectacular. Maybe my experience was soured by the 90 minutes I spent smashed into the back of a taxi to get there. Georgia is a small country, but because the public transportation is almost all minibuses and taxis, getting places can be a serious hassle and take a really long time. It’s smaller in theory. I miss home.

My gorgeous, delicious, lemony margarita. The rim of the glass was salted and spiced!

If you ever find yourself in Georgia—let me know if you’d like to! I’m helpful!—and you’re tired of potatoes and bread and vegetables called like tchintchris (nettles) or jonjoli (pickled elderberry leaves? I will eat any vegetable)—because every vegetable wears out its welcome, let me tell you—maybe go to Pancho Villa and eat some vegan Georgian Mexican. Sighnaghi is adorable, anyway.

*I know another alphabet! Those “gh”s are pronounced like “rh.”

Seven best Bay Area veggie burgers & Mission Burger’s vegan burger recipe! BURGERS!  »

Obviously I’m trying to optimize SEO for anyone searching for “burger” and when I do things, I go big or go home! So usually I just go home but today: GOOGLE BETTER WATCH ITS BACK.

Anyway! I wrote some stuff up for SFoodie, first being (WHAT I BELIEVE TO BE) the seven best veggie burgers in the Bay Area. Next: a cobbled-together recipe for the dearly departed Mission Vegan Burger. I got the recipe from the nice dudes at Mission Street Food, and then tried to scale it down because that shit was originally for 70 patties and lord knows I can EAT but 70? Touché, Mission Street Food dudes. Touché. Oooh, perhaps we sell them at the next SF Vegan Bakesale?? We just need an industrial deep fryer. You got one? Wanna be my boyfriend?* Please note: if you have one and bring it to the sale, I WILL steal it. OMG, I’ll be deep-frying errrthang in site. You’ll be like, “Laura, where did you go?” and I’ll be all, “Oh sorry, I was just deep-frying my face!” Except I’ll probably be deep-frying a candy bar because ew, health code violation!

Please forgive me, it’s been a rough day. Take us away, picture of the Plant Burger (which may or may be on the list)!
photo from Ed U. on Yelp via SFoodie!

*Sorry, Jonas! I’m sure you understand, you’d do the same to me. It’s either leave or be left, baby!

Vegan meats galore: Veggie Brothers review!  »

Veggie Brothers is a mail-order restaurant that I had always wanted to try (I especially like anything mail-order: Restaurants! Wine! Brides!) but had never had the time to wait for the food nor the money to fulfill their $60-plus-shipping minimum order (because despite what you may be led to believe by television, graduate students are neither rich nor glamorous). That’s why I about had an aneurysm when Veggie Brothers reached out to Vegansaurus and asked us to review the gourmet offerings on their site. I was also excited because Veggie Brothers reposted something I wrote about Lady Gaga’s meat dress on Facebook a couple months ago, and I’m a sucker for the approval that I never received from my parents.

I tried to rope my mother into doing this with me because she will not eat anything unless it is covered in meat and then fried in meat and cheese because “is healthy, Mark! Russians very healthy! You be anemic soon and you die and you feel bad because Mommy warn you!” Unfortunately, my mother was away on another one of her cruises (she goes on at least three a year) so I had to resign myself to forcing Allen to eat with me while we watched Oprah (Allen’s unreasonable demand) by romantic candlelight.

Our first adventure began when it was time to receive the food. One of the downsides to the mail-order restaurant model is that you have to be home in order to receive the food, which is sent packed in dry ice in a special cooler. This may be a problem if you are terrible at planning/don’t have a place for UPS to leave the package/aren’t at home very much. We had to play tag with UPS which actually included me running after a truck and insisting there was a package for me. Unfortunately, there was not. The package was in another truck that I did not have to chase down! As soon as we got the package inside the house, Allen and I immediately proceeded to have the best time pretending we were Dr. Frankenstein while unpacking the food and putting it in our freezer. If shipping is a downside, then the way that these products are shipped are a major plus for me! Dry ice in a styrofoam cooler? Food in reusable plastic bags? I’m there!

Let me be honest with you: I was not expecting much. The directions on each of the bags (and we had six) was to plop the individual entrees (still in their packaging) into boiling water or to microwave them for a few minutes. I’ve had frozen dinners before. They may look good on the box, but once you’ve heated them, they’re just not that great. If you know what I’m talking about, you understand why I was expecting to be disappointed. However, Allen and I bravely soldiered on, putting the food onto decorative plates (I cannot believe we own such a thing) and discussing its merit as we watched Oprah interview someone who had overcome one life-threatening condition or another.

What follows is a detailed review of exactly what Allen and I ate and how we felt about it. We tried to order the most exotic/hard-to-make dishes we could, our assumption being that if the harder dishes were good, then the simple ones must be fantastic. I do not know if this is a fair assumption, but it got me to try vegan Mahi-Mahi, which for me is good enough.

Read More

Loving Hut in Inner Sunset to open THIS SATURDAY!  »

Hey guys! We reported on it going in and now we have word that it’s opening on Saturday, Dec. 18! As in, TOMORROW! Er, or it might be Sunday. EITHER WAY, it’s this weekend. 

Who’s going?? Drumsticks for all!

That’s Ching Hai, calling in an order of drumsticks to go for me. 

[thanks for the heads-up, Hugh!]