Lady Gaga didn’t make anyone kill a cat, but this shit is still hella sad! »
A 20-year old girl, getting ready for a bangin’ night out, goes through her normal beauty regimen. Glitter: check. Water bra: check. Whiskey flask: double check. Outfit splattered in neighbor’s cat’s blood: Ch-wait, what?
I guess pre-gaming is a little different these days. Angelina Barnes from good ol’ Oklahoma has been charged with animal cruelty, and being a fucking creep, after a series of events leading up to a Lady Gaga concert. Gaga, no offense, but this kiiind of trumps your meat dress.
A news report states a relative of Barnes came home, presumably to unwind with a nice Colt 45 and a little Idol, only to see a “completely dark house, with duct tape covering light switches.” [Ed.: creepy!] And there Barnes was, just hanging out in “a long coat with streaks of what ended up being cat blood on her face.” It puts the lotion in the basket.
Poor Whiskers. It’s clear this woman is very mentally unstable. Ready for some more of investigators’ findings? Purple hair dye/blood all over the bathroom; a drowned kitty-kins, belly cut open and “eyes mutilated; the cat’s liver was found in a makeup case on counter.” So Barnes was taken to a hospital, where she went all Girl, Interrupted and tried to slice a nurse with some glass. Her family claims she has previously suffered from depression, but this behavior was completely out of character. Not that anyone ever says, “Oh, yeah, I taught my kids how to appease the gods by offering up the blood of innocent critters. I also like them to use scented candles for ambiance.”
Of course, the media loves to blame famous persons. Especially famous liberal persons. If it’s not Josh Groban, it must be the devil. Fox was quick to correlate a young student’s suicide to an Obama speech on the same campus. So, like Marilyn Manson’s plight of the ’90s, Gaga must now pick up the burden on the fucked up happenings of her fans. You monsters. Barnes, I hope you have a nice recovery, and mental illness is a rough biz, but the cat didn’t do anything to you.
[Ed.: Now let’s all look at cute adoptable cats because 1. You know you’re already looking at kitty porn! and 2) I need to focus on something that’s not super fucked up so I can get out of bed tomorrow morning!]
It’s Anya! She’s up for adoption in Alameda (MY ISLAND HOME FROM WHENCE I CAME) and she’s adorable and you want to spoil her with awesome love and not drown her and smear her blood on your body. I know that normally goes without saying but as it turns out, you can never be too careful! Ugh!
This guest post was brought to us by Jessi Stafford! Jessi is originally from St. Louis…ish. She’s now squandering her fortune while freelancing in Baton Rouge, LA. A University of Missouri Journalism grad, Jessi uses her degree for cocktail-drinking. She loves hyperbole and whoring around thrift stores. Jessi’s becoming a regular (guest poster) on Vegansaurus and we love it!
Save the wolves! Keep them protected! »
This whole budget business is messy as my room. All these goddamn riders! One such rider is the de-listing of wolves as an endangered species in Idaho and Montana. This is utter bullshit and really sad. From Earthjustice via the LA Times: “For the first time in history, Congress is removing a species…from the Endangered Species Act based on political, rather than biological, judgments.” Like I explained last week, wolves are being attacked for eating livestock and competing for “game” with hunters.
I don’t really sympathize with livestock farmers but that’s a better reason than that of the hunters; at least it’s like about their livelihood (as animal abusers). It’s like I’m sorry the wolves are making it more difficult for you guys to hunt but isn’t that part of the point? If you want easy, go to the damn grocery store. De-listing an endangered species so you have an easier time hunting is just depraved thinking and sneaking it into the budget agreement is so slimy.
From Friends of Animals, here’s how you can help:
Listed below are the phone numbers and contact info for the Senate. Please call not only your own senators, but every Senate Democrat as many times as you can. Please also pass this information along to other animal advocates. Wolves need every voice possible.
Capital Switchboard Numbers: give the name of the senator and you will be transferred to their office. You will then either speak to a staff member, or to voice mail on the weekend.
When possible ask to speak to each senator’s environmental aide. This will give you a better chance to get your message across because you will be talking to someone who is familiar with the issue.
The delisting language must be stripped out of the final bill:
Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid
522 Hart Senate Office Bldg
Washington, DC 20510
Phone: (202) 224.3542
Toll-free for Nevadans: (866) 736.7343
INDIVIDUAL LIST OF SENATORS:
Barbara Boxer (D-Calif.)
Thomas R. Carper (D-Del.)
Frank R. Lautenberg (D-N.J.)
Benjamin L. Cardin (D-Md.)
Bernie Sanders (D-Vt.)
Kirsten E. Gillibrand (D-N.Y.)
Tom Udall (D-N.M.)
Jeff Merkley (D-Ore.)
Sheldon Whitehouse (D-R.I.)
Comments: (202) 456.1111
Switchboard: (202) 456.1414
Another important thing to note is that this isn’t just about wolves: “as [Josh Mogerman, spokesman for the Natural Resources Defense Council in Washington, D.C.] said the rider could mean threats to additional species in the future. ‘There’s a process in place for dealing with these issues in the courts. But by Congress acting, it’s just a completely different animal,’ he said. ‘You look down the [Endangered Species Act], you see critter after critter and plant after plant that are probably inconvenient to special interests all over the country. And what [they] have done is opened the door to removing plants and animals from the ESA by whim, rather than science.’”
[Cartoon by me, photo from Living With Wolves]