New Quorn Vegan Burgers: Yummy!  »

Quorn’s got a new vegan offering and I got to taste it! I like it a lot! Yay for new foods! The company sent me a free package of the new frozen patties via flying monkeys, a.k.a. FedEx, which made me feel like a rock star. 

The directions say you can microwave, grill, bake, or pan-cook them. Since I was at work and am impatient and lazy, I nuked the thing in order to taste it right away. 

Naked Quorn 

If you’ve ever had the non-vegan Quorn chicken patty, just go ahead and erase that memory forever; these ain’t nothing like that. They’re thinner and not breaded and have more of a smokey, baconesque flavor profile. The microwave made the thing really tough and chewy, kind of like a jerky patty which sounds gross but which I dug in a salty-MSG-yum kind of way.

A few days later I did the Quorns up right as part of a sandwich with coleslaw (BBQ sauce woulda been swell too, someone should buy me some of that). 
This time I cooked them on the stovetop and they were much moister and softer. Husband said the texture reminded him of fish sticks, kinda flaky. The smoky flavor is pretty strong, so don’t expect these to meld or fade into your meal like a slab of tofu or whatevs.

Bottom line: This Boca Burger hater has found a new sandwich filler of choice. Yay fungus! But I’d be even happier if the company offered a few flavors to mix it up. May Quorn come to a store near you!


I grew mushrooms, and you can too!  »

Look what I made! It’s oyster mushrooms, growing out of a box, and heading straight for my belly! 

The box, as you may or may not be able to tell from my crappy, grainy photo (sorry) is a kit from Back to the Roots. The kit is pretty rad and makes growing fungus on top of your refrigerator a miraculous joy instead of just a gross accident, like it normally would be.

The whole thing started right at U.C. Berkeley in 2009, when a pair of students figured out they could become rich and famous by selling people kits to grow mushrooms on coffee grounds. 

I first encountered these kits in an earlier iteration for sale at Berkeley Hort in mid-2010. I bought one for my man for his birthday, but you had to collect your own coffee grounds and we only drink a little coffee, so that took forever. By the time we had enough, the mushroom spore/coffee mixture had molded; it was a messy disaster.

Fast-forward to this year’s VegFest Colorado in Boulder, which I will remind you is 1,250 miles from Berkeley. Lo and behold, there was a Back to the Roots booth! This stuff had gone global (or at least regional)! I told the lady at the table about my sad, gloppy failure, and she was totally puzzled. See, now the kits come pre-loaded with coffee grounds (they come from Peet’s), and is much fancier and easier. She gave me a free one so I could try again and write this review.

Well, VegFest lady, it took me forever but I have tried, and I have conquered, and I say to the pink dinosaur-loving masses, go grow thee some mushrooms!

Step 1 involves slitting open the bag of mushroom spores (white) and coffee grounds (black) and soaking them in water for 24 hours. The water turned all dark like coffee; it was kind of gross, but not really that bad.

Next, you put the bag back in the box, put the box in a spot with indirect light, and keep the whole thing moist by misting it twice a day. For nearly a week, it looked like NOTHING was happening. Then BAM, it was like super-speed.

See all those little shroomies poking out on the right of the opening? I’d leave for a few hours, and when I came back, they would be noticeably bigger. Every time! It was like The Peanut Butter Solution. SO COOL!

I harvested a batch and they were tasty. I’m going to see if more grow, then I’m going to flip the kit over and open the other side and do it again. I’ll update if there’s more news. Home-grown mushrooms. Love ‘em.

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