Go Max Go debuts vegan Butterfingers! »
The rumors are true: Go Max Go has added a new candy bar to its vegan line! The bar is called Thumbs Up and it’s a vegan version of a Butterfinger. I love Butterfingers, so Go Max Go sent me a free bar to try. Now I will tell you all about it.
Official opinion: AMAZING! Like, so good. I can’t remember exactly what Butterfingers taste like, but to my best recollection, these are an excellent approximation. They are crispy and best of all, peanut-buttery. As soon as I bit in I was like, “hot damn!” I’ve had a few vegan Butterfinger-type things in the past and they were all great, but they were generally a harder consistency than the real thing. Very toffee-like. These are different; they’re much lighter, which I think the real bar is like. Kind of like half-toffee, half-peanut butter wafer.
If you want to get your own Thumbs Up, Go Max Go tells me the bars are going to hit stores this month! They should be showing up in online vegan stores first, so keep an eye out. I for one can’t wait!
Top 10 links of the week! A breezy ride through veganism! »
[Your cute animal video of the week, stolen from Pawesome. Look how quiet yet excited that dog is!]
Remember hearing like all wild fish are totally going to be gone soon? Well, some scientists disagree. Some agree. I hate fishing regardless. Sounds like a party!
Good news in San Francisco: Activists end live bird sale at SF’s Farmers’ Market!
Big surprise: Tilapia farming is totally effed!
Fish oil may not prevent depression; probably kills fish.
Apparently a dog helped take out bin Laden and this is my discussion topic of the week. Did you see Sarah’s post about parachuting dogs? I just think it’s crazy! I know they form bonds with their trainers or whatever but jumping out of planes? Seems effed! Some actually get PTSD! What do you think? Is what they do so important that it’s worth the risk? I don’t know, they can’t give consent. Seems effed.
Your weekly WTF from Defenders of Wildlife: “The U.S. House of Representatives today passed the first in a series of three bills that mandates the acceleration of the offshore drilling permitting process and opens up new areas to oil and gas drilling.”
This is kind of funny! From This Dish is Veg: Seven ridiculous restaurant logos that feature happy animals selling meat. [Ed.: for many more of these, check out Suicide Food!]
Go Max Go announces peanut butter cups and new candy bar flavor! »
Coming soon: two new chocolate candies from Go Max Go, “Cleo’s” and “SNAP!”
From their site:
Romeo and Juliet. Cleopatra and Antony. Peanut Butter and Chocolate. Some romances turn out better than others. At long last, our one-and-only rice-milk chocolatey coating cuddles the creamiest, dreamiest, peanut butter filling ever! So, if this combo makes you want to walk like an Egyptian, Cleo’s™ peanut butter cups are for you!
When your taste buds are ready to raise the roof and make some noise with a whole lotta toasty, crunchy, crisped rice POW! jammed into a hunk of rice-milk chocolatey BAM!, Holy Candy Bar!, prepare to be knocked out player, SNAP!™ is the bar for you!
The peanut butter cups are obviously self-explanatory but it sounds like SNAP! is basically a Hershey’s Krackle? Sounds like it. I used to love those but for some reason I’d only eat them on Halloween. I used to trade all my Raisinets for them because Raisinets are ick. You are all about to tell me you like Raisinets, aren’t you. You’re all crazy!
Rebecca from Florida sends us a photo of her Christmas Eve dinner, her dad’s pasta aglio e olio—“whole wheat pasta with olive oil, garlic, and many herbs such as basil, mint, and parsley, topped with Daiya”—and vegan cranberry apricot stuffing. That package at the top left of the photo is a English-style Christmas cracker, made by her mother. Rebecca’s had “organic ‘cruelty-free’ lavender bath salts, a Twilight Go Max Go candy bar, and a couple of vegan-related jokes (What does a Vegan Zombie say? Grainnnssss!).”
Later, Rebecca’s six-year-old sister set out soy milk and Healthy Happy Life’s chocolate-chip walnut cookies for Santa. AWW, YOU GUYS. What family!
[send us your holiday food photos! we’re taking them through Saturday, Jan. 1!]
(Read that title in the same kind of bellow that Fred Flinstone uses to summon Wilma. Huh? Huh?)
So (sigh!) PETA is at it again. Not content with being the most annoying animal advocacy group on the planet, they’re now turning their attention towards politics (well, sort of). Introducing, Bin Laden Bites! Honestly, I don’t know what to make of these. Are they being funny? Is this supposed to be a “can’t we all just get along” gesture for the holidays - rallying all of humanity against its common enemy? Is it a cash grab (as in, they’re hoping that the Glenn Beck fans who want these won’t pay much attention to who’s selling them)? Is this a supposed to reach out (or around…) to the Real Americans PETA has heretofore been unable to attract? A demonstration of that sense of humor none of us animal-rights types are supposed to have? *shrug*
The real mystery, though, is what possible connection these “savory” (I know - huh? But that’s how they’re described on PETA’s site) treats have with animal advocacy. Yes, they are vegan, which is a good thing, but vegan activism/outreach in the form of boring-ass dark chocolate squares with Osama Bin Laden on them? YAWN! Really, this seems to be just another example of PETA’s “Any Publicity Is Good Publicity” policy in action, and again, YAWN! Boring chocolate + boring scandal = boringness x infinity. Oh, and it’s expensive ass boringness! $15 gets you five (no kidding - five) squares of dark chocolate.
I guess that’s the really crappy thing about this whole deal - it’s just so fucking condescending. Assuming PETA really is concerned about the troops over in Afghanistan, is this really the best thing they can think of? Do the PETA staffers sitting in their offices honestly think that biting into a little square of dark chocolate bearing the image of Osama Bin Laden is going to make the men and women who are sweating it out over there feel any better? Do they really think that plain dark chocolate is a good way to let non-vegans know that, hey, veganism can be fun too? Maybe instead of plain dark chocolate squares with a terrorist figurehead on them, they could try, well, sending the troops vegan chocolate that is actually awesome?! How stoked would most soldiers be to get a frozen crate of Go Max Go bars? I think the satisfaction of biting into chocolate that isn’t described as “savory” (again, huh?) and actually is awesome is way better for both the animals (because then more people get to know that veganism is delicious and fattening not joyless and lame) and the soldiers (because they get real satisfaction and good chocolate instead of just pretending that biting a piece of chocolate with Bin Laden’s image on it is somehow satisfying - “ha ha - take that, you bastard! I’m sure showing you!”).
Given that PETA spends more than $8 million annually on public outreach and education and over $1 million specifically on its cruelty-free merchandise program, I’m pretty disappointed that this is the best they could do on their big support-the-troops/support-animals crossover special. I like the idea of PETA finally connecting animal issues with human issues in a way that makes sense to people (or at least in a way that doesn’t make at least some segment of the population hate PETA, and by extension all animal activists, even more than they already do), but this little tidbit is just confusing and off target. I would love to see PETA introducing some kind of vegan item that people could buy and send to the troops in Afghanistan, the proceeds of which could maybe go toward animal rescue in places affected by conflict (like, say, Afghanistan), but I guess that’s too much to ask this year.
Product review: Go Max Go Candy Bars! »
Go Max Go has released a line of vegan candy bars that are the Designer Imposters of the sweet treat world! And much like PRIMO smelled exactly like Giorgio, these candy bars are pretty g-d close to the originals. They have the Buccaneer (vegan 3 Musketeers), Twilight (vegan Milky Way), Mahalo (vegan Almond Joy) and Jokerz (vegan Snickers)! We conducted a taste test at Vegansaurus HQ with three of the bars, and here are our results:
Buccaneer Bar (vegan 3 Musketeers)
Joel: A little gummy, denser than I remember the original but delicately sweet. Chocolate shell is convincingly milky, that is, tastes like nothing much.
Meave: Darker nougat, a little grainy, though of near-equal fluffiness—high quality. Exterior missing signature diamond pattern. Chocolate is very milky and sweet—quite accurate. Overall, excellent. Have very pleasant memories of devouring original; would attempt to repeat with this one.
Jonas: Tastes right. nougat stuff is perfect. outside maybe flakier?
Twilight Bar (vegan Milky Way)
Joel: Surprisingly accurate to how I remember it. Least visually appealing but it has just the same unctuousness that causes the entire gob to slide down your throat involuntarily when you try to swallow a little bit [Ed. note: I almost puked typing that]. That sounds pretty bad [Ed. note: at least he realizes it] but it’s just how Milky Ways are.
Meave: Initial exterior is ugly. The 50/50 caramel/nougat ratio seems heavy—was Milky Way more 30/70? Caramel tastes oddly of vanilla; needs salt. Nougat still excellent.
Jonas: Caramel taste is too strong. Too much caramel. Too gooey.
Mahalo (vegan Almond Joy)
Joel: So good. Not as overstuffed with coconut as it should be but the filling? JUST RIGHT. Honestly, in Almond Joy vs. Mounds, the nut just distract. But the coconut is all that I want and more.
Meave: I admit prejudice against Almond Joy, which I always hated. Same prejudice applies—can only assume is accurate replica. Again “milk” chocolate is good but I can’t stand the sickening-sweet coconut filling. Blech.
Jonas: Really good! Really sweet!
Laura: DELICIOUS!!! This tastes so much like Almond Joy (aka THE BEST CANDY BAR EVER), it’s ridiculous.
The bars average $2.50 on the these sites and it’s well worth keeping a stash in your candy drawer*. What I think is pretty impressive about the bars is how they got that cheap candy bar flavor down. Most of the vegan chocolate that’s available is dark and I gotta be honest, it just doesn’t do it for me. Before I was vegan, I liked CHEAP chocolate, I’m talking Russell Stover CLASSAY—the more waxy and not-quite-a-real-food-tasting the better. These candy bars fill that spot quite nicely. It’s worth the extra money to eat something that is pretty right on AND supports a vegan-owned business. I’m into it.
*Does anyone still have a candy drawer? And if you do, isn’t it just filled with sex toys? Well, time to Take Back the Candy Drawer and fill it with chocolate. Or chocolate and sex toys. Peg Bundy-style, y’all.
All photos courtesy of the awesome Joel!