vegansaurus!

08/25/2009

MILK: “nature’s wellness drink!” or, How propaganda becomes fact   »

We are superfans of Sociological Images blog, and today they call our attention to more deviousness by every vegan’s favorite single-entendre ad campaign, good old Got Milk? Apparently 2009 marks 12 years of famous people hawking the “benefits” of milk, as though anyone needed reminding that cows milk is the nectar of the gods, and abstaining from it condemns you to a brief, miserable life of being short and weak, ending in a painful, osteoporosis-related death. Not to mention how happy producing all that milk makes the cows, and their little male calves, lifelong members of the Future Veal of America club. Cows milk is SO FUCKING AWESOME, why aren’t you drinking some (from the carton, like a real man) RIGHT NOW?

Chicago’s ABC affiliate would certainly like to know! After all, according to the Got Milk Campaign representative (a.k.a., an employee of the California Milk Processor Board), cows milk is “nature’s wellness drink!” It helps you grow, it helps you play, it helps you be the best goddamn human you can be! Eschew it, and you’ll be fat, weak, and morally decrepit before some apple-cheeked seven-year-old can fish his Oreo-brand cookie out of the big glass of icy cold vitamin-D-enriched milk he dropped it in. Don’t believe her? It’s on the news, for heaven’s sake! If it weren’t true, they wouldn’t air it on the news, would they? Enjoy these informative three-and-a-half minutes:

When was the last time you heard soy milk presented in such a positive light on the local news? Never, right? The most recent nonsense I can recall was all that braying about “too much soy” causing little heterosexual boys to become homosexual, because of the evil hormones in soybeans or something. As though anyone supporting the consumption of cows milk products can talk about the dangers of hormone ingestion.

The treatment this news anchor provides this dairy industry spokesperson is something we’d expect from a morning show host interviewing some actor about a film about happy puppies—no real questions, no discussion of issues, just, “Tell me what’s great about your product!” and three minutes of shilling. I can’t say I’m surprised, being of the “all TV news is a bunch of bullshit” school of civic cynicism, but that doesn’t mean I’m not disappointed. Twelve years later and they’re still demanding that we Get more torture-Milk, and still no one is questioning them except loopy health nuts and vegans. Ugh.

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