vegansaurus!

08/03/2010

Vegansaurus NYC: Muffins in Union Square!  »

Fuckyeahmuffinphotoshoot! There’s a farmers market in Union Square and I passed one stand called Body and Soul (on the west side between 16th and 17th streets) that had all kinds of vegan treats! Including chocolate muffins! And blueberry corn muffins! I got one of each! They had some other muffins, a few cookies and some empanada-looking things. The muffins I got were super good. I actually preferred the blueberry corn muffin even though the other was, you know, CHOCOLATE. I must say that both muffins were kind of dry but I don’t mind that—I kind of prefer that. But I am a soda biscuit fan so it makes sense.

Look what I noticed during the photoshoot though, sad muffin!:

Don’t be sad, Mr. muffin! Well, he’s not sad anymore. Because he’s dead! Bwahahaha! Poor sad, dead muffin.

07/23/2010

The circus fucking blows. And how you can help!  »

Today is the first day of the Ringling Brothers performances on Coney Island this summer. THAT SUCKS! I HATE RINGLING BROTHERS! I HATE CIRCUSES!

All animal abuse is awful but many of us probably have our one issue that bothers us more than others and for me, it’s circuses with “performing” animals. ESPECIALLY the elephants. I love elephants! They are amazing! They are so totally cool and sweet and I love them. Juxtapose that with how horrifically they are treated—it’s despicable! They get electric shocks, and don’t forget about the disgusting bull hook. I would bull hook the heck out of those “trainers,” I swear. As far as animal abuse videos go, this one just kills me. I won’t watch it ever again because I will cry and not leave my house for three days and then only emerge to be mean to people. It’s not of Ringling but trust me, there are plenty of Ringling videos too. I will give you permission not to watch this video because it is super-disturbing and I feel like vegans don’t have to watch that stuff since we are already vegans. Everyone who goes to the circus, however, should have to watch that video over and over.

Back to Coney Island: I already missed the big protest but we can still go out and meet with the protesters on any Wednesday through Sunday while the show is running. It’s running until fucking September. GOD! I’m about to cry! But I won’t because I’m a tough guy.

Anyway, everyone knows that Cirque du Soleil is way better than Ringling. Like, a million times better. And they don’t use any animals! Has anyone besides me seen the one that’s just in Vegas, O? It’s amaaaazing. My family and I went a few years ago and I was all like, “what’s this thing? I don’t know, I’m tired,” but then I went and it was SO AWESOME. Actually, it was so dope that I kind of can’t see any of the other ones because they are not as awesome.

Another thing I hate: how all the New Yorkers are so very enchanted by the whole elephants having to walk through Manhattan every year. OMG it’s just so totally amazing. I’m like, STFU JERKS! Why are people so selfish? Probably because it’s our world and animals are just here for entertainment and food because they can’t protect themselves from the cancer called humans. Right on!

[illustration by Megan Rascal]

[Ed.: Crappily, the circus will be coming to the SF Bay Area in August and September. If you’re interested in heading out and educating circus-goers of the crappiness behind the tents, please holler at the fine folks with Humanity Through Education.They make it really easy to show up, grab some leaflets and signs, and help the animals of the circus! And check out Ringling Abuses Animals for other stuff you can do too.]

07/19/2010

Vegansaurus NYC: S’nice!  »

After I reviewed the V Spot in Park Slope, all my commenting pals were like, “You got to go to S’nice!” Well pals, I’ve been there like 80 times now! And I’m a big fan. I do love a sandwich. Ohhhh and the banana chocolate chip muffins! S’great. S’wonderful. Let me s’top.

First I was all about the curried cauliflower and chickpea wrap. I don’t love wraps but this one is decent. I love cauliflower! I would marry cauliflower! I would make sweet love to cauliflower right in front of broccoli’s face! But I will have to get my cauliflower from somewhere else because now my thing is the vegan panini. It’s super! It has tofu slices, sun-dried tomatoes and pesto! On ciabatta! Now to be completely honest—I can be honest, can’t I?—the tofu is on the bland side. It’s trying to look like mozzarella but it just tastes like flavorless cooked tofu. But the pesto! Oh, the pesto! And sun-dried tomato! And ciabatta! It’s delicious.

To do a thorough review, I had to try the vegan Philly cheesesteak, as you know I’m the expert. I give it 3 out of 5 Veganstaurs on the cheesesteak scale. It’s not that authentic, though it’s definitely as greasy as a cheesesteak. It comes with fried onions and peppers so they’ve got that right. The bread is not really the same as a Philly cheesesteak, but it’s good nonetheless. The main discrepancy is that the “meat” is chopped kind of thick—wrong, wrong, wrong! However the cheese is gooey and yummy.

Other things of note: there’s like a million vegan cookies but I haven’t tried any of them yet. I prefer my cookies in dough form, you see. Oh, I’ve also tried the breakfast burrito; it’s decent. It’s good for, I don’t know, breakfast. They make an excellent Arnold Palmer! Like, perfect. I hate complaining about lines but the line kind of always takes a while. I can’t tell if it’s just because they are so darn popular or if the service is just slow. It’s not the worst though. All the tables have these signs that say, “no computers at this table between 11 a.m. and 3 p.m.,” or something like that. I don’t want to work on my computer there anyway but the signs annoy me. Nobody tells Megan Rascal what to do! You can sit outside, which is nice, but it looks like you have to keep your dog tied up on the other side of the gate: LAME! Though I’m sure if they met the notorious F.I.G., they’d make an exception, considering he’s THE MAN.

I went to the Manhattan location once. It was alright. It was on the crowded side and our waiter was just plain mean. I took my omnivore friend Kevin and, boy, what a baby! He ordered the Cuban sandwich which is like fake ham, pickles and swiss cheese on bread. Fake ham, pickles and cheese. Surprise! It was gross! Alert the media! Protect the children! Crazy omnivores. It’s sad though because now he’ll never go there with me again. Boys are goddamn babies, I swear.

In summary, S’nice is nice for sweets, sandwiches and Arnold Palmers!

01/18/2010

Maoz Vegetarian NYC  »

I could go for some vegan fast food almost any time of the day or night. Don’t get me wrong, sitting in a restaurant can be really pleasant. But sometimes you just really want to devour some scrumptious shit on the fly!! Lucky for me, Maoz Vegetarian has a handy dandy location less than a block away from me. On cold, blustery, rainy nights when I am dumb enough to wear flip-flops to yoga, I know I can always stumble into this falafel joint and enjoy a scrumptious vegan meal.

For $7.95 I got a winter special: lentil soup and a Jr. Maoz sandwich. For another $3 I got a bunch of orange seeds with some orange juice. In short, the food was delicious. It was filling—oh my fucking god I can’t even breathe. While the orange concoction was tasty, I prefer my juice seedless. And $3 is a lot of money to spend on seeds.

As for the service and ambience? Well, my cashier was kind of a douche:
-Is the soup vegan?
-Yes. But it’s premade so we wouldn’t be able to change it if it weren’t.
-Oh, okay. Well I’ll have the winter special thing. Could you just make sure that everything in my order is vegan?
-The falafels are premade so we couldn’t change them anyway. It’s vegan.

Yeah. When I am sincerely asking whether or not my meal has any animal products at a vegetarian joint, I don’t want to get some patronizing bullshit as a response, kthx. I will definitely go back; I just may peek my head in to see if the same asshole is at the register.

(Psst! To my West Coast compadres, a location is coming soon on Telegraph Avenue in Berkeley!)

01/05/2010

Vegansaurus NYC: Pure Food and Wine!  »

Here I am, still on my East Coast holiday. I went up to New York to visit my big brother and while I was there my sister, my sister-in-law, my sister-in-law’s sister (what do you call your sister-in-law’s sister? She’s my brother’s sister-in-law but I don’t think she’s mine. There’s no word for it! Wacky English language!) and I went to Pure Food and Wine in Manhattan. It’s a pretty swank raw vegan (some items have honey but they’re marked) restaurant in Union Square. OMG the last time my sister-in-law was at Pure Food and Wine, Gisele was there! The model! OMG! You starfucker.


The food was pretty damn good. Raw isn’t always my favorite because while I’m not a meat-and-potatoes kind of girl, I am a bread-and-potatoes kind of girl. There’s not much of that at a raw place. But the menu here was pretty impressive; it was hard to decide what to order. For starters, my sis-in-law got a papaya salad that she loved. I got a super-delicious frisee salad that had some tasty pears and stuff in it, and I’m not that into salads. I’m a picky eater! Don’t you hate when you don’t want to eat something and people are like, “but it’s vegan…” like you’ll eat anything that’s meat- and dairy-free! Jeez louise. I guess this is kind of an aside. Back to our regularly scheduled program!

For the entree I had this pretty crazy pickled-beet ravioli thing pictured above, officially titled “Sweet Pickled Beet and Rosemary Cashew Chèvre Ravioli.” It was good. I wasn’t in love with it…but it was good. The chèvre was very tasty but I wasn’t that into the pickled beets. My sister got this enchilada thing that was just some mush but SO GOOD. She’s not vegan at all but she was totally into it.

With dinner, I had a sake mohito and it was the sheezy. All their cocktails were sake-based. Does anyone know what that’s about? I didn’t ask our waiter. He had a ponytail. Those are unrelated thoughts.

The desserts were really good. There was a lot of ice cream and sorbet, as well as a few cake-like items. My sis-in-law got the assorted sorbet dessert. It was very pretty and very yummy and we all shared it with her (AND got our own desserts. You know how we do!). That’d be a good dessert to share if you didn’t all want to get your own thing. I got the mint chocolate sundae. It was AWESOME. It had three kinds of ice cream, all very delicious. My sister got that too and she liked it a lot.

All in all, banging! If you couldn’t guess, it was very expensive. If you can afford it, it’s definitely worth checking out. It would be a great date place, it’s got kind of a romantic atmosphere—reds, dark woods, romantical lighting—but still relaxed.

[photos by Megan Rascal]

01/04/2010

Road Trip: Wild Ginger in NYC  »

I went to Wild Ginger last night with my omnivore friend Franke. it was amazing! It’s a pan-asian nearly vegan (a few items have whey—wtf? Whey is not vegan! But they are marked clearly) restaurant with a location in Manhattan and another one in the Cobble Hill neighborhood of Brooklyn—that’s the one we were at.

To start, we had the spring rolls. BEST SPRING ROLLS EVER. They tasted different than usual and I can’t put my finger on exactly what was different but they were gooood. There was definitely more of a ginger flavor to them than other spring rolls. THEY WERE SO GOOD MMM I WANT SOME NOW.

We also got soup—miso soup comes with the entree but I opted for the pumpkin soup instead. I highly recommend it! It wasn’t a cream soup; it had chunks of pumpkin and sweet potatoes as well as white beans.

For the entree, I got an eggplant and string bean dish. It comes with brown rice! The rice wasn’t sticky rice so I ended up using a fork instead of chopsticks BUT DON’T TELL ANYBODY. I love string bean dishes but I don’t always get down with eggplant so I was a little worried but then it was so great! It had a garlic sauce that was a little sweet and not super garlicky —very good. My issue with eggplant is usually that it’s not cooked enough but this was perfect; the eggplant chunks were nice and soft and had no bitter undercooked eggplant flavor.

For dessert, I had the chocolate peanut butter bomb. KA-BOOM! It was super good too! The peanut butter cream was not overpowering and the chocolate cake part was excellent. Franke got mango sorbet that he liked a lot.

This place is definitely worth a visit. I really loved everything. It’d be a great place for a date; they have lots of booth tables that are private-like and it has nice dim lighting. Oh! And they were playing the best jazz while we were there. It’s the kind of jazz that makes you feel like, “hey, maybe I don’t hate jazz!”

[Pictures from Wild Ginger’s website]

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