Review: the Parkway Speakeasy Theater! »
For being delightfully in the heart of Oakland, the Parkway Speakeasy Theater place sure sees a lot of Skinny White Bitches.* In fact, I can count the number of black people I’ve seen here on one hand AND I ONLY HAVE TWO FINGERS. That’s a lie about the two fingers but wouldn’t that be cool? And by cool, I mean horrible. Other than the not-so-delightful gentrification (wait sorry, revitalization) of Oakland, I do enjoy sinking my fat white ass into one of the comfy (yet probably highly unsanitary) couches to enjoy a second generation first-run movie or art house feature. They also have special nights with horror films, kids’ films (you can bring your gross baby that night) and tons of other special events. But the coolest thing about the parkway is that you can GET ALCOHOLIC BEVERAGES DURING THE MOVIE. OK, not all alcohol, it’s only beer and wine but there are decent selections in both categories. The second most awesome thing about The Parkway is that you can enjoy your movie while snacking on VEGAN PIZZA (they make their own vegan cheese, kinda like a fake ricotta but it works, and tons of vegan toppings!) They also make a few vegan sandwiches and salads and various other vegan-friendly snacks (and often vegan cookies!!)! It is a very satisfying experience. The vegan stuff is clearly marked on their menu and they’re open to suggestions so you can email them or leave a comment card when you’re there and they’ll try to accommodate. It was loud-mouthed vegans who got the vegan stuff onto the menu to begin with it so it pays to speak up and FIGHT THE POWER! Or NICELY MAKE A SUGGESTION!
Two more things: It’s only $5 admission price and it’s two-for-one on Wednesdays! Love that as I’m hella cheap. Also, they have a second location in El Cerrito if you want to enjoy a movie out in the sticks. El Cerrito is totally far away.
*Oh and calm the fuck down, Skinny White Bitches of the world. I don’t need any hate mail because I used such an offensive slur against your people. If being called a Skinny White Bitch is the worst thing that has ever happened to you well then, LIFE IS GOOD.