Vegan Eggnog, ho! My former boss and current pal Phil asked me for a vegan nog recommendation. I suggested Isa’s recipe. He modified it and look how pretty it came out!!! He said it was very good and even garnered compliments from the omnivores. Here’s his version:
1.5 16-oz packages Nasoya Silken Tofu
1.5 13-oz cans organic, unsweetened coconut milk
3 cups hazelnut milk
1/2 cup maple syrup
1/4 cup agave nectar
2 teaspoons cardamom
3 teaspoons pure vanilla extract
1 tablespoon fresh lemon juice
2 tablespoons freshly grated nutmeg
3 tablespoons ground cinnamon
1 cup Kentucky bourbon
Pour it all into a blender and blend the fuck out of it. Then put it in the fridge for a while to settle. Then drink it.
Yay! Thanks, Phil! Good job.
Make this banana nog! »
A couple of weeks ago, Laura taunted you with a skeleton of a nog recipe I was working on. Well, I am proud to say that it is complete and delicious! This nog doesn’t necessarily taste like the store bought stuff, but is delightful nonetheless. Even better, it’s vegan (duh), raw, soy-free, and gluten-free. G’damn!
2 cups soaked cashews (heaping 2/3 cup raw, unsalted cashews, soaked for at least six hours, overnight is best)*
3 cups water
5 dates, pitted
1/3 cup agave nectar
1 Tbsp. lucuma (optional, but will give it a buttery taste and is a super food!)
1 tsp. nutmeg
1/2 tsp. allspice
1 tsp. cinnamon
1/4 tsp. salt
1 tsp. vanilla powder (extract would be fine too, just add a little more)
If you have it, Maca would be a wonderful addition as well!
Rinse your soaked cashews. In a blender (Vita-Mix is best!) pulverize cashews and water until completely smooth. If this is not possible to obtain with your blender, you may need to use a nut milk bag, or come to terms with the fact your nog will be a little chunky. Add the rest of your ingredients and blend together! Because this recipe has banana in it, the longer it sits, the more unappealing the color becomes. It’s best to make this the day of consuming it; however, if beige beverages don’t gross you out, it tastes awesome the next day!
Virgin banana nog, second day. Dusted with cinnamon.
Add brandy or dark rum and have at it!
*Short on time? Not caring if the nog is raw? Just boil the cashews.
Those adorable godless harpies at the hairpin had a vegan nog-off and we are flagellating* ourselves for not thinking of it first GODDAMMIT VEGANSAURUS! All we do is eat all the food and drink all the alcohol and WE FUCKING LOVE NOG!** There is no excuse for our behavior. NO EXCUSE!
I am disgusted with and by and for us.
While we’re flagellating* ourselves in the vegan fatty shame corner, please check out the nog-off; it looks like the nogs all faired pretty well, except for that shit made with tofu but no doy.
Added bonus! Our Jenny, a vegan chef of extreme talent, created a nog recipe just for you that’ll blow the socks off all those other bullshit nog recipes. And it goes like-uh this:
4 cups cashew cream
Some lucuma powder (raw foodists love this shit, it will give it a buttery taste)
Some cinnamon (teaspoon? experiment, get loose!)
Some nutmeg (teaspoon? experiment, get loose!)
1/4 cup agave nectar
HELLA RUM (get real loose!)
Blend all that up in a VitaMix (accept no substitutions!)
Please make and report back!
You guys! It’s not too late to throw together a vegan nog for the nog-in contest at Fabric8 this Saturday! They only have one vegan entry so far and they want more!!
If you’re interested, email Fabric8 and let them know you’re coming! And you plan to win! Oh, and did you see Isa’s new nog recipe? Looks INSANE, are you insane enough to enter it!? DO IT ENTER DO IT!!! And here’s more vegan egg nogs if you need even more ideas! Yes, it’s just a google search but still, VERY HELPFUL.
That sign above is from our entry last year. We did not win but we think it was rigged because we are poor losers!
Holiday Nog-in! Vegans need to enter! »
There is a Nog-In (which is more of a holiday nog-off because there will be a winner! with prizes! I think!) on Sunday, Dec. 27 from 5 to 7 p.m. at Fabric8 in SF. We want a vegan to win this piece! If you think your nog has what it takes to reign supreme, email them to enter! Remember, the secret to any delicious nog is just a shitload of booze. Also maybe a couple of twenties. And it might help if you’re attractive and willing to sleep with the judges. You are, right?