It’s National Oatmeal Day! Whenever I’m forced to eat breakfast in a non-vegan-friendly restaurant at a work event or whatever, I can almost always count on the oatmeal to help me leave feeling full, if not exactly satisfied (“$7 for this? I make this at home every morning. Thank god someone else is paying…”).
But maybe it’s time we kick our oatmeal up a notch. Maybe it’s time we do steel-cut oats, and in a slow cooker, with cardamom and rose water and pears. Maybe it’s time we MAKE THIS RECIPE!
Or just get a packet of the instant stuff and eat it straight, no water, whatever you need to do to get through the day.
Let’s have a moment of silence for all the oatmeals out there. Amen.
Vegan MoFo: Pumpkin Oatmeal »
It’s motherfucking pumpkin season, folks. Every year around this time, I gorge on the sweet squash by inserting it into as many concoctions as possible. The amazing flavor and lovely color herald the fall holidays, my favorites. So when I woke up this morning with a headache brought on by far too much wine last night, I needed something sweet, bright, and comforting. Hence this pumpkin oatmeal was born:
Pumpkin Oatmeal for One
1 cup water
1/4 cup rolled oats
1/4 can pumpkin puree
1/4 tsp. vanilla
1 Tbsp. agave nectar (or maple syrup, or sugar, or whatever)
assorted pumpkin-esque spices (allspice, cloves, cinnamon, ginger, nutmeg—OR just some pumpkin pie spice)
Put water in saucepan and bring to a boil. When it’s boiling, add everything else, and reduce the heat. Cook, stirring occasionally, until it’s as runny or dry as you like. Add raisins or nuts or something if you’re nasty. Eat away your hangover.
Vegan MoFo: Rachel’s Amazing Super-Fast Oatmeal
I eat the exact same thing for breakfast about 97 percent of the time. Why? Because it’s awesome, and also because there’s nothing worse in the morning than having to make decisions. Actually, the cat peeing on your bed or a car alarm going off for hours are examples of worse things, but why make life harder, you know?
I make a non-instant, microwave version of oatmeal with awesome stuff in it. It’s super-healthy, keeps you full, and takes only five minutes, including prep!
Disclosure: the photo above is not a photo of my breakfast. It’s a photo of someone on Flickr's breakfast because a) they're a way better photographer than me (come on guys, you've seen me try to shoot food) and b) I forgot to take a photo of my breakfast.
1/3 cup rolled oats (NOT quick-cook or instant. Glue-city!)
About 2 Tbsp. chopped date pieces (to taste)
Sprinkle of salt
2/3 cup water
Sliced almonds (Or even better, those chopped and roasted ones you normally grind into almond butter that they seem to sell nowhere on Earth but the Berkeley Bowl. I’ll love you forever and even pay you back if you wanna mail me some of that, SO GOOD.)
Mix the oatmeal, salt, water, and date pieces in a microwave-safe bowl. The date pieces (or other dried fruit) are key: They break the surface tension and help keep your bowl from overflowing (science!).
Microwave for 3 minutes. Important: You may have to experiment with your power-level settings here. If your oatmeal overflows and pisses you off, then set the power level lower. I used to have a shitty microwave and it just worked, but now I have a stronger one and have to set it to Power Level 7.
Let cool for like a minute, then sprinkle with cinnamon, flax oil, and almonds to taste. I guess you could use other nuts or whatever but I’m almonds all the way, baby. Sometimes when I’m feeling really crazy I sprinkle on some chia seeds, but watch out, those like to nestle between your teeth and make you look dumb when you get to work even though you really did brush them, you swear.
Enjoy the deliciousness! Also cinnamon in the A.M. helps you be less hungry all day (Dr. Oz says so)! So do fat and protein! It’s really awesome!
You’re welcome. Now you know what to have in the house for me when I come visit.
Oatmeal, obese monkeys, and breast-milk ice cream in this week’s link-o-rama! »
First, and most important! IT’S MY BIRTHDAY! Happy birthday TO ME! You can thank my parents for their gift to the world.
[Latest documentary/cartoon from Cats Vs Human. What if I just call cartoons “documentaries” from now on? And phone calls will be “radio interviews”!]
They are selling breast-milk ice cream in London. BREAST-MILK ICE CREAM. While I’d rather die than eat breast-milk ice cream (right now I’d rather die than move, though), I’m in full support of this because it’s hilarious and brightens my world. Well Ok, I think maybe I’d try breast-milk ice cream for like $20,000. But is it going to pull in weird fetishists? Survey says: Probs.
Hey! Did you know that the SF SPCA appointed new presidents last month? Yes, more than one president! Two presidents—they’re calling it Four-Legged Leadership! One a super-savvy business man and the other a genius veterinarian.
Jerk scientists are getting poor monkeys fat and not letting them exercise, because we definitely can’t find any people like that to test on. The New York Times will tell you all about it!
PCRM is suing the federal government because the new nutrition guidelines are crap! They don’t like the “doublespeak” and “mumbo jumbo” the USDA uses when it should be calling out meat and dairy. I have a bone to pick with them too! Three servings of dairy, really? REALLY? CRAP!
UNC and Duke have picked Eating Animals as their summer reading requirement! I was supposed to read the biography of George Washington. Definitely did that.
From Mark Bittman, we have the most in-depth discussion of oatmeal I’ve ever seen! Specifically, oatmeal from McDonald’s: “Incredibly, the McDonald’s product contains more sugar than a Snickers bar and only 10 fewer calories than a McDonald’s cheeseburger or Egg McMuffin. (Even without the brown sugar it has more calories than a McDonald’s hamburger.)” Yowza!
Do you have a vegan tattoo? A tattoo with vegan subject matter? Super! Submit it to new website veganink.com and let’s get this party started!
Over at veganbaking.net, you can read an interview with Cinnaholic’s Shannon Michelle! Read all about how Cinnaholic came together and get advice for your own vegan baking biz! Can we all agree that Shannon Michelle is dead-sexy?!
The veggie internet has been a buzz about this story from Yahoo sports: Vegetarianism is all the rage in MMA! That’s ultimate fighting. It’s a sport. I guess.
There was a big earthquake in New Zealand! The Search Dog Foundation is on the case! New Zealand has its own dogs but the SDF’s training leader is going over to help with the search and rescue. We wish them the best of luck! Be safe and save people!
Lastly, don’t forget about the East Bay Vegan Bakesale tomorrow! Get treats, get pudgy!