Great job, humanity: Global warming forces ocean fish to new waters  »


Global warming is fucking with the fish, and the fish-catching economy is finally catching on. From All Things Considered:

The new study in Nature shows these anecdotes aren’t simply a fluke. Data from fish catches from around the world show it’s happening everywhere the ocean is warming—which is just about everywhere.

So they’re seeing swordfish in Denmark, Mexico-based Humboldt squid in British Columbia, and Atlantic mackerel in Iceland. I wonder what it’ll be like when we’ve made the oceans so hot fish can’t live there anymore. What’ll become of the pescatarians?

"This is suddenly a wake-up call," [Mark Payne at the National Institute for Aquatic Resources in Denmark] says. “It’s a strong suggestion that climate change is here. It’s real, and it’s really starting to affect what we catch and, therefore, what we eat.”

Bye, environment! Nice polluting you!

[Narrow-barred Spanish mackerel photo by Klaus Stiefel via Flickr]


Industrial farming is killing the oceans  »

Remember how the ocean’s fucked? It’s still fucked, especially in France, where the beaches are unfit for human presence because of “Up-stream releases of manure from intensive farming that overload the near-shore waters with nitrates.” It causes growth of a seaweed that releases a toxic gas!

Farm effluent is so amazing. It creates dead zones in places like the Gulf of Mexico and the Chesapeake Bay, which now covers 83 miles of that body of water. Back in December of 2010, the Environmental Protection Agency proposed a plan “to dramatically reduce the levels of nitrogen, phosphorus and sediment that states can allow in the bay from municipalities and farms,” but guess whose opposition is blocking the EPA from implementing it: the American Farm Bureau Federation’s! Of course! Because dead zones are caused by runoff from those giant places food comes from, farms and feedlots.

In Brittany, 31 wild boars were found dead last week; the animals “‘were not [otherwise] sick and they did not drown.’” People can’t visit the beaches there because they could release pockets of the toxic gas the algae produces and die. How would this happen? By, you know, slipping and falling in the algae, or running, or walking. Not that anyone wants to play on a beach covered in horrible slime.

Industrial farming! It feeds most of the world while it kills the oceans! The best part of history is always when you realize no one’s planned more than like 10 minutes into the future.


A scary PSA about plastic and marine life courtesy of the Surfrider foundation as part of their Rise Above Plastics campaign. Warning: DOWNER.

Scientists are morbid freaks  »

Forensic scientists are sinking dead pigs into the ocean to see how human bodies might decompose in the water—way to be FREAKS. And then marine biologists are collaborating with them to study dead zones and the animals that can inhabit them. I say collaborating, every online article says, “piggybacking.” WTF is up with puns when people are writing about gross animal stuff? They are relentless. But regardless, two studies for one pig!

All I can say is at least they are dead before they put them in the ocean. I couldn’t tell at first. Apparently they get the pigs from the butcher. What about all the children? Where will they get their saturated fat?!

The best part is that according to this article from 2008, America’s meat habit is a huge contributing factor to the dead zones. So when they get these pigs, are they contributing to the very problem they wish to solve? Survey says: YES!

[Megan Rascal cartoon]

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