Review: Hard Knox Cafe!  »

I’m all super-bummed that Souley Vegan is closed. Like, really fucking bummed. It was the only place in the Bay Area where a vegan could go for some delicious Soul Food. In observance of their closing, I will review a lesser Soul Food restaurant that can fill your need for Southern fried goodness—KINDA SORTA. Hard Knox Cafe is a meaty-meat Soul Food restaurant with two locations, one in Dog Patch and the other in the Outer Richmond. They have a few vegan items on the menu: the red beans and rice, black-eyed peas and rice, French fries, string beans, and the side salad are all vegan and all very tasty. They have an outstanding veggie burger that they make there with fresh veggies and it’s vegan. I mean, it has nothing on the mac n’ cheese or mashed potatoes of Souley Vegan. OR THE YAMS. The yams. I’d write those yams a sonnet. They tasted like Christmas. Or what I imagine Christmas tastes like in a family whose mother didn’t cancel Christmas every other year because she was having a psychotic breakdown. Alas, some things are better meant for therapy than they are for Vegansaurus. Lucky you, I don’t distinguish between the two so hey: I had a difficult childhood.


If you are a vegetarian or vegan or prefer to not die of animal-fat heart attack then you can get a big-ass plate of three vegan sides for only $7! Combine that with a jug of fruit punch (I usually have Diet Coke but whatever, I am not from the dirty dirty) and maybe some white sandwich bread and you, sir, have yourself a meal deal cheaper than Mickey D’s! And you’re not supporting the devil, you are supporting an adorable Vietnamese-owned Soul Food restaurant! That is not as good as Souley Vegan but it’s ALL WE HAVE. Ugh. So depressed.

ONE SUGGESTION FOR HOW THEY COULD BE MORE AWESOME: add a vegan po’ boy to the menu. Yes. Excellent idea.

[photos via yelp]


Review: Great India!  »

Great India is hot damn delicious! It’s currently my first choice for Northern Indian food in San Francisco. This is because not only is it hot damn delicious, there are many vegan selections (try the Vegetable Sabzi and the Aloo Gobi! Both are exceptional!) and they don’t use ghee (butter) in any of the food! SCORE! The Aloo Paratha (most delectable wheat potato-filled bread) was the best I’ve ever had, vegan or not. It’s pretty cheap too; $8.95 gets you one LARGE dish that includes rice or naan. Lots of places do not give you rice or nan with the dish, making you pay extra because they know us assholes will pay for it! But the glorious Great India does not play us like that! I love them! The delivery is slow as fuck so order about an hour and a half before you think you’re gonna be hungry. Bonus because they deliver to the entire city.

Eating in is an awesome experience. First, you gotta find the place. It’s in outer BFE on Geary Boulevard at 25th Avenue Make sure to eat a lot because you will need the fuel to get the fuck out of the Richmond. Second, the lunch buffet is ONLY $6.45! Super cheap and almost everything is vegan! Woo! Third, the waitstaff actually knows what the word vegan means and so there is never any worry about eating something that will make you and your stomach very sad. Fourth, if you eat here once, they will remember you forever. Especially if you’re a girl. Ladies, if you’re ever feeling unattractive, I suggest you get yourself to Great India where you will be treated as the twin sister of Catherine Deneuve! And I’m talking her Belle de Jour days! Although, current-day Catherine Deneuve is still about 100 times hotter than most of the uglies you see showing their ugly mugs in public. For shame, uglies. Anyway, they will lavish you with compliments, free drinks and free snacks and generally do everything short of going downtown. It’s delightful. Once, I ate here with my friend, Mark. When Mark went to go get fifths from the buffet, one of the guys asked me if he was my boyfriend and told me that if he ever mistreated me that they would take him out. Listen, Mark is The Super Gay. But he does mistreat me. Conflict. So I told the guy that I would let him know and then I WARNED MARK THAT HE BETTER TREAT ME RIGHT OR THE INDIAN MAFIA WOULD BE ON HIS ASS.

Man, that was a great day.

[Udaipur City Palace and Lake Pichola by pov_steve. Great India didn’t have many pictures on its website so that will have to do.]

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