Vegansaurus NYC: S’nice!  »

After I reviewed the V Spot in Park Slope, all my commenting pals were like, “You got to go to S’nice!” Well pals, I’ve been there like 80 times now! And I’m a big fan. I do love a sandwich. Ohhhh and the banana chocolate chip muffins! S’great. S’wonderful. Let me s’top.

First I was all about the curried cauliflower and chickpea wrap. I don’t love wraps but this one is decent. I love cauliflower! I would marry cauliflower! I would make sweet love to cauliflower right in front of broccoli’s face! But I will have to get my cauliflower from somewhere else because now my thing is the vegan panini. It’s super! It has tofu slices, sun-dried tomatoes and pesto! On ciabatta! Now to be completely honest—I can be honest, can’t I?—the tofu is on the bland side. It’s trying to look like mozzarella but it just tastes like flavorless cooked tofu. But the pesto! Oh, the pesto! And sun-dried tomato! And ciabatta! It’s delicious.

To do a thorough review, I had to try the vegan Philly cheesesteak, as you know I’m the expert. I give it 3 out of 5 Veganstaurs on the cheesesteak scale. It’s not that authentic, though it’s definitely as greasy as a cheesesteak. It comes with fried onions and peppers so they’ve got that right. The bread is not really the same as a Philly cheesesteak, but it’s good nonetheless. The main discrepancy is that the “meat” is chopped kind of thick—wrong, wrong, wrong! However the cheese is gooey and yummy.

Other things of note: there’s like a million vegan cookies but I haven’t tried any of them yet. I prefer my cookies in dough form, you see. Oh, I’ve also tried the breakfast burrito; it’s decent. It’s good for, I don’t know, breakfast. They make an excellent Arnold Palmer! Like, perfect. I hate complaining about lines but the line kind of always takes a while. I can’t tell if it’s just because they are so darn popular or if the service is just slow. It’s not the worst though. All the tables have these signs that say, “no computers at this table between 11 a.m. and 3 p.m.,” or something like that. I don’t want to work on my computer there anyway but the signs annoy me. Nobody tells Megan Rascal what to do! You can sit outside, which is nice, but it looks like you have to keep your dog tied up on the other side of the gate: LAME! Though I’m sure if they met the notorious F.I.G., they’d make an exception, considering he’s THE MAN.

I went to the Manhattan location once. It was alright. It was on the crowded side and our waiter was just plain mean. I took my omnivore friend Kevin and, boy, what a baby! He ordered the Cuban sandwich which is like fake ham, pickles and swiss cheese on bread. Fake ham, pickles and cheese. Surprise! It was gross! Alert the media! Protect the children! Crazy omnivores. It’s sad though because now he’ll never go there with me again. Boys are goddamn babies, I swear.

In summary, S’nice is nice for sweets, sandwiches and Arnold Palmers!

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