Fish oil sucks, makes your burps smell gross  »

Hey guys, turns out those fish oil capsules everyone and their damn brother have been taking aren’t so beneficial after all.

In a new study by the American Journal of Epidemiology involving 3,461 male participants, results showed that men with the most DHA (the omega-3 fatty acid found in fish oil) in their bloodstreams were two-and-a-half-times more likely to have a particularly aggressive form of prostate cancer.  Similar studies in Europe discovered the very same results. In case that doesn’t scare your cojones back up into your body, further studies from bigwigs like Harvard and the American Medical Association reveal that fish oil is linked to type-2 diabetes and may actually increase risk of cardiac arrhythmias in some patients.

I’m sure the capsule-fanatics are thinking to themselves, “But what about my heart and brain function? Surely all those marketing claims about reducing the risk of heart failure and aiding Alzheimer’s patients must be true?!”

Sorry, y’all, researchers have found that elderly adults showed absolutely NO benefit at all in tests for reaction time, spatial memory, and processing speed measurements.  Reports showed that the supplements did not slow mental decline in these patients, and nor did they benefit babies’ cognitive development in vitro when taken by pregnant mothers. What’s more, the British Medical Journal reported way back in 2006 (and again in 2009) that omega-3 fatty acids have ZERO heart-health benefit. The New England Journal of Medicine had the same results in 2010.

Looks like we have even more reasons to leave our fine-finned friends at home in the water.

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