OH NO: matches aren’t vegan!  »

The world is fucking ridiculous. First the Kardashians get their own television show. Then some of them get their own spin-off show. And now it has come to my attention that matches are not vegan. Yeah, that’s right. Whenever you want to light up a soy candle that you so painstakingly made sure was vegan, you best be rubbing some sticks over that shit: matches are the devil’s work.

I was watching a rerun of How It’s Made where, among other things, they discussed how matches are made. I was shocked to learn that gelatin is a part of the chemical cocktail on match heads, and was floored when the narrator introduced “animal protein” as an ingredient promoting oxidization. I had no fucking idea that something so commonplace as a match is teeming with “animal product.” Yucky yuck. It’s up on YouTube, see for yourself. A simple google search backed up How It’s Made's claim, one source citing “animal glue” as both a combustor and adhesive, and isinglass as a “conditioner.” It makes me wonder what the fuck is in everything else I own that doesn’t have an ingredients list. Oh, the bittersweet aftertaste of truth. I think I’m going to go cry in a corner now.

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