Hello, friends! It’s WTF Wednesday (on Thursday)! »
You guys, with all the stress of this thesis and nerve-wracking interviews (I have had about a million and am still waiting, so cross your fingers for me), and turning 27 (which begins with me questioning whether I’ve done enough with my life and ends with me insisting that the only way that I can make this year the best of my life is by wearing bright red shoes to work), I have been at my wit’s end. So you know what I did this weekend? I bought a knitting machine. Why?
Because I have decided that my hobby, which I enjoy and is supposed to make me less stressed, actually makes me somewhat more anxious (what with all the dropped stitches and the tangling) so I needed to find a way to make it less stressful. The bad news is that the machine is going to take about a week to get here. The good news is that I’ve spent the past few days watching this woman, Cheryl Brunette, teach me how to make sweaters by machine. What I like best is that all of these sweaters, and her patterns, are straight out of the ’80s and will make gift-making a complete joy.
You know what else stresses me out? Charities that don’t do what they’re supposed to. I’m not even talking about Madonna’s or Oprah’s charities, because you expect those to be disasters, but my good friend Adrienne sent me a link to this super-sad article about ex-racehorses that are starving to death because the charity tasked with their upkeep has not made good on their mission. WTF, Thoroughbred Retirement Foundation? You’re supposed to be feeding and caring for these horses, chilling with them and making them feel loved! Instead, you’re starving them to death? What is wrong with you? I get that donations are down (this is a horrible economy, I empathize) but you knew this was happening and were all, We’ll just stop paying farms for upkeep and hope for the best. “The best,” as it turns out, is euthanizing a horse suffering from malnutrition. This leads me to another point: If you’re supposed to provide upkeep for a retired horse who has already been through a lot, don’t be pulling a Ms. Hannigan and letting horses die under your care. Like I said above, I get it, the economy is horrible, but get it the fuck together. Some ideas: Contact the g-d media. If the horses have been neglected for a while now, why is this the first we’re hearing of it? Horses ain’t done nothing to you except be hella majestic. Treat them with respect!
Our next link comes from my boyfriend Allen. Oh, before I get into this, I have to tell you about how we went to Dash Cafe tonight and heard the most obnoxious book club (why is this not done at someone’s house?) discussing The Art of Racing in The Rain, which actually sounds pretty awesome, and is about a family drama told from the point of view of a dog named Enzo Ferrari. However, the people discussing the book were being super loud and laying out incredible gems such as, “I mean, this book was OK, but I wouldn’t see it if it were made into a movie. The movie ruined Twilight for me, and now I can’t think of Edward as anyone but Robert Pattinson!” (Note: Stephenie Meyer ruined Twilight with her plot and writing. The movie just made it worse.) And, “DOGS ARE VERY EMPATHIC! ANYONE WHO DOES NOT LIKE DOGS IS A COMPLETE FUCK-UP AT LIFE! I’M SORRY, BUT IT’S TRUE!” The last of these actually offended me because Allen, while OK with animals, does not particularly like them, and I resent that some dude was loudly proclaiming that anyone who is not into dogs is a fuck-up. People are fuck-ups for very different reasons (one of them being inclined to loudly make proclamations and blanket statements in a tiny cafe where everyone is trying to enjoy their expensive sandwiches).
If there’s one thing this dude had right it’s that dogs are very empathic. A good example of that is this amazing dog who stayed with his sick friend in the aftermath of the tragedy in Japan. That’s some empathy and loyalty for you. Tragedy is all around and this dog is all “This is my friend, yo. I’m not going without him!” Luckily, it has been reported that the dogs have both been rescued and should be okay. Come on, though, that is awesome. How many of us have a friend that would do that for us? I can only think of two people. One of them is my mother, who would stand there and tell me exactly what I did wrong to get into the position that I needed her to risk her personal safety in order to deal with me. The other is not Allen, because he would be gone like a shot as soon as Prison Wives returned from its commercial break. He just loves to watch people make bad decisions on cable television.
That’s a real bird, you guys! No Photoshopping! How is this amount of cuteness even possible? Also, is it bad that I want this bird to be my friend? Man, you know what would be awesome? Hanging out with Cheryl Brunette AND this bird, knitting and eating birdseed and wearing giant clip-on earrings. That would be amazing!
That’s it for this week. Send me links for next week and have a happy
[bird photo by Gerard Girling for the Telegraph]