vegansaurus!

Banh Mi by Mai!

The Mission, already a magical neighborhood where vegans can eat like royalty, has become even better. How can this be so, in the land of soy milk and agave nectar? Fresh, delicious, vegan banh mi made to order and delivered to your door, is how.

Mai of Fashioni.st just launched Banh Mai, a one-woman Vietnamese sandwich operation based in the Mission. She has a vegan, a vegetarian, and a meat version; of course, Vegansaurus sampled the cruelty-free sandwich, delivered to our hot little hands on a Friday evening by Mai on her bicycle. The vegan sandwich contains standard banh mi ingredients—pickled carrot and daikon radish, julienned; jalapenos; and cilantro—on a rice and wheat baguette, but the magic is in the vegan paté, a combination of shitake mushrooms, baked tofu, walnuts, garlic, and green bell pepper. The tofu is baked with sriracha, soy sauce, and garlic. I’ve never had a Vietnamese sandwich like it before, it’s incredible. Mai packed the pickled vegetables separately, to prevent mushiness, and I recommend cramming them all into your sandwich and letting it sit for a few minutes before eating, to allow the good, crusty roll to soak up some of the sweet and tangy pickling juices. You will die of happiness.

It may not be the spiciest, for spicy food connoisseurs; I found it a touch hotter than I would’ve asked for and I’m a huge wimp, so let’s call the heat level medium and exactly right. Everything was so fresh; the vegetables were crispy, the roll was chewy, the tofu paté added this great texture plus moisture so that, unlike your standard banh mi, it didn’t want for lack of mayonnaise. Finally, it sticks with you, but not in a stone-in-your-stomach kind of way; I ate an entire sandwich before going out for the night, spent four hours dancing, and didn’t get hungry at all. Everyone needs to eat a banh mi by Mai, like, yesterday, I haven’t had a better sandwich this year. Real Talk.

Special Interview Section!
Vegansaurus: Why did you start Banh Mai?
Mai: [To be] part of the San Francisco street food movement; [I] wanted to do Vietnamese sandwiches because I miss this aspect of life in Ho Chi Minh City/Saigon—a place where I lived last year. also, I used my mom’s recipes for elements of the sandwiches, so these are the type of sandwiches I grew up eating: loads of meat filling/vegan filling, great daikon/carrot pickling, homemade mayo. “Banh Mai” is a a play on the name of the type of bread used/what we in the states call Vietnamese sandwiches, and my first name.

What are the service details?
I started delivering in the Mission last week. Wednesdays and Thursdays [are delivery days], 10-sandwich minimum, might be able to cluster orders for smaller offices. [I require a] two-day preorder (since I cook specifically for orders), or early morning pre-order if you want to pick-up with small orders (6 or less) or for vegan sandwiches.

Follow me on twitter and send me a message I’ll get in touch via direct message. Lunch deliveries will happen between 11:30 a.m. and 1:30p.m.; pick-ups can happen in the Mission, before 11:15 a.m. or after 1:30 p.m. My housemate might help me, so we could extend days/ times for pick-up delivery. We might add Mondays; follow @banhmai for changes.

Where are your ingredients from?
The bread is from Bui Phong, a Vietnamese bakery in San Jose that makes as close to the Vietnamese-style baguette of rice/wheat mixture that we have in the West. the wheat/rice baguettes in HCMC have a lot more rice and so it tastes slightly different, but it’s as close as we get in the U.S. Also, it’s the type I grew up eating (in Los Angeles) for Banh Mi sandwiches. I buy most ingredients from Duc Loi supermarket or other markets in the Mission. Whenever I can buy organic, I do, but I’m trying to keep costs relatively low while still making a quality product.

How did you invent the recipe for the vegetarian paté?
It’s a remodeled recipe from a restaurant I used to work for. I used shitake instead of those white mushrooms, put in more garlic, [and] left out the parmesan [cheese]. The baked tofu recipe is my mom’s.

I’d like people to know that the recipes for my sandwiches come from my Mom. I’m not sure how this will pan out for the long haul, but right now I’m happy sharing my Mom’s awesome cooking with San Francisco. (And as my friend Alicia has pointed out, I don’t skimp with amounts; moms never skimp with amounts to keep prices low.) Also, I’m biking as fast as I can, but that isn’t very fast right now.

Thanks, Mai! Go eat a sandwich, everyone.

Le Colonial: a place for compromise!

Unless you live in a magical family of non-meat-eaters, who raised you meat-free (it happens! I know one such family, eating at their house is THE BEST), you are probably related to omnivores. And unless you are a horrible person who never learned to grow up and stop having a fit every time a family member ate something that offended your vegan sensibilities (which, come on guys, are we still 18?), then you are going, from time to time, have to choose a restaurant that allows your family to eat animals and that provides enough vegan food that you won’t have to be little lord/lady picky-picky vegan, all asking for the whatever dish without half its ingredients and can the salad come with extra nuts maybe please? Because that can get embarrassing, too, when you’re just trying to have a nice, quiet family dinner, maybe celebrate a nice occasion, show your parents you’re a grown-up person who can conduct herself like an adult now, and you have to demand that the chef rearrange half the whole menu so your parents can pay too much for what will undoubtedly be three courses of vegetables with sauce.

Lucky for us, there is Le Colonial, a glorious mix of unabashed orientalism—the cuisine is “French Vietnamese”—and (mostly) unpretentious food. We were there the other night (note: open Mondays! Family-friendly!) for Joel’s parents anniversary; it is a very nice restaurant for an anniversary or similar, grown-up celebrations. I noted a fairly high number of older-dude/younger-lady couples, though maybe it wasn’t so high considering we were in a nice restaurant in the Theater District. As I am not involved with a peer of my father’s, I cannot tell you just where such couples spend time, but I believe Le Colonial is one such place.

There are a few explicitly vegetarian items on the menu [pdf], which by dint of their Vietnamese inspiration are vegan. Joel and I split four of them: the Cha Gio Chay and Bo Bia Chay appetizers, Dau Hu Chay entree, and Cai Bi Trang side. This proved to be plenty of food, and also taught me some Vietnamese, in that I believe that Chay means “roll” or perhaps “rolls,” plural. Yes we ate a lot of rolled food last night.

First, and best, were the Cha Gio Chay, fried “buddha rolls” made of taro, tofu, jicama, and shiitake mushrooms. They’re served with some big leaves of lettuce, and some sprigs of mint and cilantro. You roll up the little hot crispy rolls in the big lettuce leaves, with some mint and cilantro, and dip the whole package in some ponzu sauce, and then you eat it and die of happiness. Tragically, only five come on a plate and they cost $11.

Next we ate the Bo Bia Chay, cold spring rolls filled with tofu, portobello, cucumber, basil, crushed peanuts, and chayote. The best thing about these rolls were the peanut sauce that came with them; it was more savory than the average peanut sauce, and was a little spicy, too, which gave the rolls a teeny kick that they quite needed. I also found the wrappers much chewier than they should’ve been, like, unpleasantly rubbery and chewy, though Joel did not.

Le Colonial is a “nice” restaurant, so after our first courses we had a nice break before they brought our entree and vegetable. Dau Hu Chay was “pan-roasted” tofu rolls made layers of seaweed (nori), shiitake, and tofu skin, served over kale and mushrooms in a thick, sweet “soy sauce.” I put “soy sauce” in “quotation marks” because the sauce did not, as far as I could tell, taste anything like shoyu. It had the consistency of tonkatsu sauce, really thick, though significantly sweeter. It was good, just not the most delicious thing I’ve ever had. Paradoxically, while the rolls could’ve used a ladleful less sauce, their vegetable bed majorly benefitted from it all. Oh, they were delicious, better than the rolls, and they rolls were pretty tasty.

Cai Bi Trang, our extra side dish, was also good. When given the choice I do not generally choose baby bok choi, especially when one of the other options is asparagus, but these little bastards were surprisingly appetizing. They were really lightly cooked in soy sauce, with some sliced oyster mushrooms thrown in for extra flavor. They were absolutely the best baby bok choi I’ve ever eaten.

Of course I wanted dessert, but Le Colonial’s dessert menu was not at all vegan-friendly. Joel’s parents enjoyed their flourless chocolate cake, brought by our waiter for their anniversary. His parents also very much liked their meals, though I will not describe them because who cares about meaty meat dishes we are never going to eat? The point is, you can have a nice dinner here with your family, and everyone can order something, and you can eat without starving or requesting special treatment. It is not the most adventurous cuisine, but it is good, and given the chance I would eat two plates of the buddha rolls all by myself, so if you go, order enough so that you don’t have to share with your family; you know they’re going to want the obviously delicious dishes you’re eating, and oops! they can’t share theirs with you, HA HA. Besides, they are paying for it.

Loving Hut!

Loving Hut. Yes, it has the grossest name around. Loving Hut. It reminds me of somewhere a girl would go to lose her virginity to an elder. And I mean ELDERLY elder. I’m Gonna Puke Hut.

Other than that, this place is delightful. I am reviewing the SF location today but there are two others that just opened in Palo Alto and Milpitas. It’s apparently part of a huge chain that’s all over Taiwan, Vietnam and Hong Kong. It’s a Ching Hai Enterprise and so is filled with cult like awesomeness, including a large TV that plays Supreme Master TV on loop. I don’t get to watch much TV and I love it/hate it/want to marry it so when I’m in a room with one, my eyes immediately wander towards it. However, since SMTV is basically unwatchable insanity, it was both a blessing (to my friends who enjoy my company SO MUCH) and a curse (to ME, can we get some Gossip Girl up in here?!).

The menu is available to download on their website (and you would be silly not to take the delightful food tour on the same page) but don’t expect to find the exact same menu at the restaurant you go to. The prices are also totally different. But the weird thing is, they’re cheaper at the restaurant than on the site. I don’t know what that’s about, some sort of reverse bait and switch?! Mama like! Most of the food is Chinese with some Vietnamese influences and a slight touch of crazy town. They also have a section of the menu titled, “Western Food” which is basically burgers, club sandwiches and spaghetti. See above about crazy town. So far, the standouts have been the Triple Happiness (pictured below, it’s like these deep fried layers of gluten, taro and bread. Kinda like a savory gluten baklava. I think. Just try it. I think. Basically, you’ll either love it or think it’s kinda funky. Russian Roulette!), Ocean Platter (basically a big platter of delicious fried foods and yummy dipping sauces, a huge hit with everyone), Spicy Cha Cha (yam crescents that are deep fried to look and taste like shrimp HOW DO THEY DO IT) and the Won Ton Noodle Soup (with fake pork! SO GOOD!). The Guru’s Curry and Veggie Stew are also delicious, basically just big pots filled with potatoes, carrots, and soy protein chunks (beef-esque. also, that’s a great fake word) in a yellow curry/gravy mixture. They have white and brown rice available and lots of drinks (NO ALCOHOL! Ching Hai does NOT imbibe!), ranging from the tasty (vegan Thai iced tea!) to the insanely foul to adults/insanely delicious to kids (some sort of tropical drink mixture with vegan gelatin in it. I don’t know, I think I’m 10 sometimes and so I ordered it and then it came out and it was like drinking warm liquefied jello. Raunchy.)

They have desserts too, stay away from the cakes (sub-par Black China) and go for the fried bananas and ice cream! Soon they’re supposed to have fried ice cream (!!!) but they haven’t perfected it at the SF location and so we wait. Eagerly. I want that g-d fried ice cream. It’s available in Palo Alto currently so strongly considering making the drive in 5 minutes, JOB BE DAMNED! WHAT HAVE YOU EVER DONE FOR ME! BESIDES GIVE ME MONEY AND A SENSE OF PURPOSE! I say, nuts to THAT! I need fried ice cream like I’ve never needed anything! Actually, to be real, I need fried ice cream like I need a hole in the head. I just really want it. Really, really, very badly. I mean doesn’t that sound amazing? Also, I almost accidentally typed “friend” instead of “fried” ninety times in the above paragraph. What that says about me, I do not want to know. Probably that I’m really cute and fun.

Okay, also, two more quick awesome things. According to Loving Hut, SF is located in Canada. I feel like if this election doesn’t go well, this map will be called foreshadowing as half of SF is likely to move there. SNAP! Kind of! Also, the interior of the SF Loving Hut is like eating in the Taiwanese future. It’s all super bright and clean with floating hearts and shit. You sort of expect your waitress to be one of the Jetsons. Love it. This place is good for dinner with a few friends but not going to be great for large groups and not at all romantical. Unless you think Clockwork Orange is sexy and then, eat here and after that, check yourself into the psych ward, you sick fuck! Alternately, CALL ME!

Golden Era Vegetarian Restaurant

Golden Era is the original Supreme Master Ching Hai enterprise restaurant in San Francisco. nearly every item on the menu is vegan, the mock meats are the delicious, mysterious kinds made of fungus and gluten and some such, and the menu is longer than a tabloid. That said, I will try to be brief.

Lettuce wraps = ¡muy delicioso!
House rice clay pot = ¡muy delicioso!
Wonton soup = ¡muy delicioso!
Red bean vegan milkshake = ¡muy, muy delicioso!
Flan = eh.
Mocha cake = ¡muy delicioso!

If eating here required membership in the cult of Supreme Master Ching Hai, I would not have much trouble renouncing whatever vestiges of Christianity* I yet vaguely retain.

I love this place. I love the waitstaff, how they leave you alone for a very long time and never insist you have rice when you don’t want it, I love the patrons for eating here instead of a terrible meaty restaurant of death, I love Supreme Master’s plan to save the world from global warming through veganism. If only they delivered.

Tip: If you have leftovers from different dishes, cook them up together in a pan the next day and make your own Golden Era at home.

*except for Christmas. Who doesn’t love a virgin birth?

Central Vegetarian!

Central Vegetarian is a new vegetarian/vegan restaurant on Park Street, the main drag in Alameda, a tropical isle of dreams, located on the idyllic SF Bay, a.k.a. The Biggest Little City on Earth. I grew up on The Island and finding ONE restaurant with even ONE vegan item on it is like trying to figure out how Star Jones gets out of bed in the morning instead of just killing herself. It’s like Labyrinth, bitches. Next to impossible. However, with the opening of Central Vegetarian, we have a player in the game, folks! With a menu that is nearly identical to Golden Era in San Francisco and Golden Lotus in Oakland, you can’t help but believe this is a Supreme Master Ching Hai Enterprise.* And it is: the chef/owner used to work in the kitchen at Golden Lotus but then realized she was hell of in a cult and jumped ship, taking the recipes with her! You go, girl!

The menu is mainly Vietnamese but there are some Chinese and Thai dishes. If you’re not a moron, you will order any of the clay pots, CARAMELIZED CHICKEN (!!!), Spicy Gourmet Chicken (!!!) and the Veggie Chow Fun. It’s cheap, filling and delicious. A VERY VERY VERY welcome addition to the prestigious Alameda eating scene. It takes its place alongside Subway and Applebees to complete the trifecta of Alameda Power Eating (APE). Watch your back, Gary Danko; APE is coming to get you and what we lack in deliciousness, we make up for in knife fights.

*God, I love that crazy bitch. She doesn’t believe in alcohol, drugs, sex, meat or happiness. Obviously, I’m down. With most of it. I mean one thing of it.