vegansaurus!

05/03/2011

The most eco-friendly meat is bugs. Go crazy, locavores!  »


Here’s another idea for the Vegan Omnivore Alliance Against Factory Farms (CAN WE GET A BETTER NAME FOR THAT PLEASE): You want sustainable meat? Eat bugs, bitches

Don’t bugs outnumber humans something like 200 million to one*? What supply! Now, where’s the demand? If these locavores were really into creating a sustainable meat-eating future, they’d be looking at alternate sources of meat, and I’m not talking foie gras. I bet Philpott (the leader of the VOAFF revolution**) could just go digging in his backyard right now and come up with a feast for a king! Imagine how many billions of cockroaches he could raise on his farm! What was only room for hundreds of cows, pigs, or chickens, is now space for BILLIONS of locusts. The amount of sustainable nutrition that could be gotten out of limited amounts of space is truly mind-blowing.

If these conscientious omnivores are truly interested in environmentally-conscious meals, while eating locally and getting their meat on, they need to DO IT UP. Put your money where your mouth is (read: get in the kitchen and start baking up a delicious locust and wild rice terrine). Plus, I’ve heard it said that you’re never more than six feet from a spider. Can’t get much more local than that!

* On THIS earth. OMG, I bet there’s some planets where it’s the opposite and also bugs are hella big and humans are bug servants. I CALL DIBS ON THAT SCRIPT IDEA!
**Of which there has been one post on Grist about. Philpotamus, what’s up? When’s our first meet up? Is this happening or not, homeboy?! 

04/05/2011

The Humane Society of the United States: animal welfare group, or TERRORISTS?  »

[Can’t see the video? Watch it on Vegansaurus.com]

Major lolz but also: Major WTF OMG!

The best part is that this ridiculous video was made by some group called Missouri Farmers Care, which looks suspiciously like A FRONT for big meat and dairy and the industries that support them, like corn and soy. Prime example: they’re funded by one Mr. Dale Ludwig,* the executive director/CEO of the Missouri Soybean Association and the Missouri Soybean Merchandising Council. Hmm, I wonder who has money to lose if animal agriculture slows down in Missouri? Could it be the asshole who is providing all the GMO soy feed?? And get this, “Before coming to the soybean office, Mr. Ludwig worked in the agribusiness marketing and communications industry with Monsanto and Cargill.” Man, this guy is THE WORST. I LOVE that Missouri Farmers Care is ostensibly about protecting and nurturing farmers when this fucker could give two shits about them. He worked for Monsanto! You know, those seed patenting psychos who go after the small-scale, indie farmer on the regular. Oh, and I like how the Twitter feed for Missouri Farmers Care is just a mouthpiece for big beef and dairy. Way to represent the real farmers, you d-bags.

I’m thinking this looks like something that the Vegan Omnivore Alliance should go after, right? Yo, Tom Philpott! What up, homeboy?

In conclusion, if you want to support the Humane Society of the United States because they’re rad and you’re not a psycho, you can buy The Bond, the brand-new book by HSUS President Wayne Pacelle. It’s all about the human-animal bond and all that magical shit. You’ll love it.

*This link wasn’t working on Firefox earlier (Firefox, you’re killing me, bro) so here’s a cached version.

Much additional reporting and many foul words added by Laura!

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