Review: El Metate!  »

El Metate is a solid choice for a vegan burrito or taco. They don’t make me walk into light poles so hard I’m knocked nearly unconscious because I’m so preoccupied with their deliciousness (like an El Farolito burrito MAY or MAY have made me do once) but they’re very good. One thing they have going for them is the best Mexican rice in town. It’s just magical deliciousness…tomatoes and bay leaves and onions—perfect. The veggie burrito has actual pan-fried broccoli, carrots, and zucchini in it. It’s kinda like a Chinese stir-fry burrito. If Amy Tan had a baby with Juan Valdez, this is what it would taste like.* It’s really good but you have to be in the mood to eat a whole community garden worth of roughage. Which, to you, might sound either amazing or kinda gross. For me, it’s a place I have to be in the mood for. See, El Farolito, like with sex/drugs/rockn’roll/whining/bitching/eatingcookies/complaining/blamingmyparentsforallofthemisfortunesofmyexistence, I’m always in the mood for it.

Some things to note: El Metate is open from 10 a.m. to 10 p.m. every day of the week. The watermelon fresca is fucking delicious, refreshing and light! Stay away from the corn chips and go with the flour ones instead. The owner couldn’t be more friendly and adorable. He’ll most likely tell you that you look like some ridiculous celebrity. Depending on the day, it might be Lindsay Lohan or Danny Devito. Whatevs, I’ll take it!

*like Amy Tan would do it with a dude who wasn’t white?! If there’s one thing I learned from The Joy Luck Club it’s that Chinese women be marrying white men. And that Chinese men are mean and/or weak. And also, the importance of understanding one’s heritage. That’s why I’m taking a trip to HomeTown Buffet today. It’s important to remember your roots.

[photo via yelp]

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