Giant squids are being killed by ocean noise pollution. NOT COOL »
This is so unacceptable. First of all, don’t fuck with giant squids because they will cut you. WITH THEIR AWESOMENESS. If you’re not convinced of this fact, I have a list of ways in which the giant squid rules all:
- They can measure up to 60 feet long
- They have eight arms
- Their eyes are the size of beach balls
- They’re so enormous, that sometimes they eat whales as a snack! (please see accurate dramatic representation below)
- They can change colors! What! I thought only hyper color t-shirts could do that! Also, Mom, I’m still waiting for one of those! It’s not too late for me to be one of the cool kids
- Female giant squids are bigger than male giant squids and still, they work it. Go ‘head, ladies
Annnnnnnd case closed.
Because giant squids are so wily and elusive (good job, giant squids!), humans haven’t figured out how to kill and eat them just yet. However, when humans can’t destroy ocean animals by ripping them out of the water, we just murder them via sonic waves. We are so amazing at killing everything! In related and also unrelated news, I’m gonna throw myself off a bridge later today. I kid, I’m not ready to end it all, I must stay around to torture you all via exclamation marks and CAPS LOCK!!
"The friendliest whales in the world" from the Telegraph. Apparently these gray whales will like come right up to your boat to check you out and get pets! They even got a dude kissing them! God, whales are so awesome. This whale doesn’t look that big in this picture but check out this one; he’s huge!
I can’t believe whaling exists. People are the worst.
Sea Shepherd Captain Paul Watson—he’s so totally the man. My favorite part: “We’re just insane.” Because people are TOTALLY INSANE. Except me. I’m like Princess Sane-a-lot. It’s exhausting.
Japan suspends whale-hunting, Colbert weighs in! »
That’s right! The awesome powers of Sea Shepherd have totally freaked out the Japanese government and they have suspended this year’s whale hunt. Goddamn that’s awesome! See? Sometimes super great things happen! The suspension is only temporary but still, it rules.
Here’s the Colbert clip (plus some):
[Can’t see the video? Watch it on Vegansaurus.com!]
OMJesus I’m so excited! I love the whales! I love Sea Shepherd! Let’s celebrate! I feel like we need some Sea Shepherd fan-art. Anybody?!
I’m totally jazzed about this video of David Rothenberg and crew jamming to the smooth sounds of humpback whale songs (that was my radio disk jockey impersonation! Genius idea: I could be a radio disk jockey for Halloween! That way I could stay home and send a radio to the costume party in my place)! There’s an interesting interview with Rothenberg, a professor who "explores the world of interspecies music," over on the New York Times' Dot Earth blog. When I say interesting, I mean it was short enough so even I could finish it. They talk about the different issues surrounding whaling. Rothenberg stays pretty
lame diplomatic on the subject. He makes some good points about the need to navigate cultural differences in the matter.
There was one statement that sounded particularly odd to me: “No one NEEDS to eat [whale meat], but it is possible to eat such things and also love them and want to save them. That’s part of the paradox of being a human being.” Is that really possible? It sounds less possible and more ridiculous than an alligator barbershop quartet. I’m not trying to take a hard line on this but loving something and eating it? That’s kind of a totally perverse idea and it just makes me think of cannibals and zombies.
This week certainly has been trying; thank goodness it’s time for the link-o-rama! »
This is Wilson, a bunny from Harvest Home Sanctuary. He could be your best new bunny pal, if you are in Berkeley tomorrow! HE HAS HIS OWN BUNNY TO CUDDLE!! Wilson is a meta-bunny! Read about where and when to find him below.
Your Vegansaurus loves bunnies; what about you? This week, the SFPD confiscated 23 bunnies from a pet store—it’s illegal to sell them in the city—and you can adopt them from Animal Care and Control starting tomorrow, Saturday June 19, at noon. Harvest Home Sanctuary is also holding a rabbit-adoption event in the East Bay, in conjunction with the House Rabbit Society, on Saturday! You can meet rabbits at Berkeley’s 4th Street Shopping District, at 1824 4th St., from 11 a.m. to 4 p.m.
What the FUCK: Miami is building a new stadium for the Florida Marlins, which will include two saltwater aquariums as part of the walls around home plate. “To safeguard it from impact, Lexan—the material used for bulletproof windows—will be installed in front and in back of the acrylic panels.” I’m sure that the animals living in those aquariums will totally appreciate the thickness of the material, seeing as how it has to be designed to withstand fucking BASEBALLS BEING THROWN AT IT.
On the sea creatures tip, let’s talk about whales. Japan, what is your goddamn problem? Some groups are hardcore protesting showings of The Cove, while you’re bribing the fuck out of members of the International Whaling Commission?! Just disgusting. Apparently 95 percent of people in Japan have never eaten whale—just drop it already. EVERYONE JUST FUCKING DROP IT. Norway and Iceland, you too. Maybe Pierce Brosnan will convince you? Maybe.
Egg production is supremely fucked up; for one, “egg production” is a tidy euphemism for “forcing hens to lay eggs.” Even “free-range” is a lie: the Humane Society filed a complaint against Rose Acre Farms this week because the conditions the company’s chickens live in are fucking horrific, certainly not the “humane and happy environment” full of “happy” chickens Rose Acre is selling people.
Look, they grow vegetables at the North Pole! Yes, even iceberg lettuce (not that that’s funny, per se). Here are some tips on storing your lettuce so as to keep it fresh and crispy as long as possible. Oh and try not to feed anyone juice boxes or fruit cocktails, as even the “organic” ones are full of lead.
Matt Baume "meets the city’s most unlikey pets" in the Bold Italic; the founder of Slow Food USA wants to integrate slaughterhouses, by way of mobile units, into cities. That’s what I want on my streets—the sounds of mass-murder! Definitely the solution is more, smaller slaughterhouses in urban areas. Alternatively, we could do like U.S. Designer of the Year John Bartlett and stop participating in terrible systems of death.
Terrible system of the week: wildlife photography. It is mainly a lie; the animals are bred in captivity, rented out for pictures, and often sold on the exotic-animal black market. The feature in Audubon magazine on these horrific, depressing, disgusting practices is shocking. And gross. You absolutely must read it.
OK right, everything continues to be really awful, and I’m sorry about that. Science says that good things happen to people who do good things, though, so keep on doing your part for the animals. Be as cynical as you like; the key is not losing your empathy (I think).
What’s up with Obama lifting the ban on commercial whaling? »
There hasn’t been enough in the news lately about marine life being killed by the excesses of civilization, so what the hell, let’s talk about whaling. Food Fight Grocery alerts us to a FOX News report (via UPI) that Obama is set to “break his campaign pledge to end the slaughter of whales” by negotiating a compromise to lift the ban on commercial whaling. The International Whaling Commission next meets on June 20, when they will take up the proposal for a vote.
FOX News is trying to score cheap political points, but for once, they’re not wrong on the facts. Environmental groups are angry, and there’s a lot to not like here. The International Fund for Animals, along with Greenpeace and HSUS, released an open letter [PDF] condemning the compromise and has been urging action to flood the White House with calls.
So what’s this all about, anyway? The compromise would allow Iceland, Japan and Norway, the three remaining nations that hunt whales, to hunt whales legally for commercial purposes. In exchange, the nations would have to cap whaling below their current numbers and agree to tighter monitoring and regulation, including new efforts to help with conservation of whales and other marine life.
Iceland, Japan and Norway are going to keep hunting whales no matter what, and the number of slaughtered whales has been rising every year. Reducing this number would count a win, and by bringing outlaws under the watchful eyes of regulators, the worst abuses can be stopped—at least, that’s the logic behind the compromise. Environmentalists and other detractors say that passing the compromise would legitimize whale hunting, and that the compromise offers no long-term target to end whaling entirely.
At stake may also be the very existence of the IWC. If members can’t agree on a compromise, all signs point to the collapse of the 63-year-old organization. That would mean no standards, no monitoring, and nowhere to report illegal whaling.
No matter where you stand or which evil you feel is the lesser one, it’s clear that consensus on whale hunting will never happen without reaching the people who demand whale meat (and maybe smacking them upside the head). We’ve already gone after New Zealand for supporting this compromise, and if it passes, we’ll be really unhappy. But if it doesn’t pass? For the whales, it might be even worse.
Fishy Business »
Somehow, pescatarians always seemed innocuous to me. Someone telling me “Oh, I’m a vegetarian, but I eat fish,” didn’t really bother me. I had this false sense that our terrestrial friends always got the worst of it, and then I saw this video.
Fishy Business is an amazing (and short, only 15 minutes) documentary on the horrible practice of drift-netting that, although banned internationally, is still practiced by at least 500 boats in the Mediterranean area. The one case that struck me especially was a drift net that caught a family of five endangered whales (something like 100 in existence??). Luckily they were saved, but seeing as 90 percent of all of the catch produced by the net is unwanted, a whole lot of dead marine life get tossed back into the ocean just so places like Delmonico’s can stay in business. No thanks.